When broken down according to age and gender, among South Koreans, those within the age groups of 30’s to 50’s and women replied ‘no’ at a higher rate than average, and the same went for North Korean defectors in the age groups of 30’s and 40’s, and women.

<Table 9> Do you think children should support their parents?: North Korean defectors

For South Koreans, those who replied ‘yes’ was slightly higher at 52.7% than ‘no’ at 46.7%. For North Korean defectors, ‘yes’ was 82.6% and ‘no’ 16.5%, showing a stronger tendency toward supporting one’s parents. When broken down according to age and gender, among South Koreans, those within the age groups of 30’s to 50’s and women replied ‘no’ at a higher rate than average, and the same went for North Korean defectors in the age groups of 30’s and 40’s, and women. They are the ones who bear the actual responsibility of having to support their parents. It can be deduced that those who shoulder the actual burden of sustaining their parents – namely, South Koreans in the age groups of 30’s to 50’s and women, and North Korean defectors in the age groups of 30’s and 40’s and women – tend to think the state and society, and not just the children, should also take on the responsibility of taking care of the elderly.

These results need to be particularly noted by both Koreas, which consider filial piety to be a virtue of a different level compared to other nations. In order to sustain and preserve filial piety as a traditional virtue, the responsibility of supporting one’s parents should not be shifted only to the individual and his or her family

28 S/N Korean Humanities, Volume 2 Issue 1

A Comparative Study on Everyday Life of South Koreans and North Korean Defectors

in the name of morals, but the state and local communities should be able to take on some of the burden and actively put in place a socialized caregiving service, so that a physical basis that can actually uphold the traditional virtue of filial piety can be established (Lee 2011, 41). Traditions are handed down to future generations not simply through morals of individuals. They are maintained and further developed through the state system and the societal system befitting to the modern era.

Although the idea that parents have to be supported by their children is weakening, both South Koreans and North Korean defectors showed a stronger awareness toward the need to celebrate the birthdays of their parents and other family milestones. In a request for the respondents to choose which events all family members must attend, apart from weddings and funerals, 75.4% of South Koreans chose ‘parent’s birthday’, 72.1% ‘Ch’usŏk’, 70.3% ‘Lunar New Year’, and 66.5% ‘other special family events’. 61.5% of North Korean defectors answered ‘parent’s birthday’, 46.8% ‘Lunar New Year’, 42.2% ‘Ch’usŏk’, and 23.9% ‘other special family events’. It seems that parent’s birthdays had priority over traditional holidays, showing that familism is still quite strong in both societies. However, in the case of North Korean defectors, because they were already separated from their families and could not come together, the overall percentage was lower compared to South Koreans.

In a question asking which gender they prefer for newborns, South Koreans overwhelmingly answered ‘does not matter’ and, in fact, showed a preference for girls over boys.10) This preference for girls, who in general tend to be more caring and sensitive toward her parents, reflects the fact that there has been a transition from the pre-modern child-parent relationship based on rules and obligations of having to continue the family name, perform ancestral memorial rituals and support aging parents, to a more modern relationship based on affection and caregiving (Chung and Kang 2012, 52). Other recent research also show that the sense of fulfillment parents feel in regard to their children has shifted from socio-economic success to emotional benefits of childrearing (Nam and Chung 2012, 114).

10) According to Korea Institute of Childcare and Education’s Panel Study on Korean Children 2008 , both parents were found to prefer daughters. The strong preference for sons has started to disappear in Korean society since the 2000’s.