What stood out to you in this week’s readings or classroom discussion?

What Is It? 

Reflective Journal Entries (RJ) provide you the opportunity to reflect upon what you have been learning in classroom discussions, the course textbook, and your personal life. RJs are also an opportunity to examine what you may want to change or what you have become more aware about your own nonverbal behavior. These short journal entries may be used in class to facilitate discussions.

What Do I Have To Do? 

Each RJ should be typed and a minimum of 2 pages (max 4). RJs are opinion based and no citations are necessary UNLESS you are using a direct quote from the text (include page #) or using an outside source.

Using concepts we have learned over the past two weeks, reflect on your own nonverbal trends and behaviors addressing these (or similar) questions:

What stood out to you in this week’s readings or classroom discussion? 

Was there anything in this week’s readings which did not make sense or confused you? 

What have you noticed about your own behavior or become more aware of? 

How did you relate to the information in this week’s discussions and activities? 

Has the classroom discussion or readings caused you to change any of your behaviors? 

The questions listed above are a brief sample of the type of information you should be covering in your RJ. You have the freedom and flexibility to write about anything that we are currently learning in the course which is related to your personal life.

How Am I Graded? 

Grading for these journal reflections is very simplistic and based on the quality of content. In other words. Did you complete the assignment meeting the outlined requirements of papers including font size, grammatical, spelling, and length requirements? Did you discuss appropriate and class related content and practically apply it to your life? If your answer is yes to both of these questions, then you will do just fine on the assignment.

The First 12 Minutes of Flirting Using Nonverbal Communication – Study Reveals 26 Body Language Cues of Attraction

*In Heterosexual Partners

By: C. Philip

Retrieved From: http://bodylanguageproject.com/articles/first-12-minutes-flirting-using-nonverbal-communication-study-reveals-26-body-language-cues-attraction/

Adapted From: Hall, Jeffrey A. and Chong Xing. The Verbal and Nonverbal Correlates of the Five Flirting Styles. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior. 2015. 39:41–68. DOI 10.1007/s10919-014-0199-8

 

According to researchers, you can tell if someone likes you based on their nonverbal signals and these unfold in a more or less ritualized fashion. By breaking down the 26 signals analyzed by Jeffrey Hall author of The Five Flirting Styles: Use the Science of Flirting to Attract the Love You Really Want” and Chong Xing in their research it was possible to outline the specific way that couples indicate attraction to one another.

The study had heterosexual pairs sit down next to one another in a get-to-know you session which evolved over 12 minutes. Not only did the researchers discover that people tailor their nonverbal communication to their own flirting style, but the cues they used matched the level of physical attraction they had for their conversational pair.

The First 1-3 Minutes

In the first few minutes it’s important, says the research, to watch for nonverbal cues such as flirtatious glances. These are normally quick bursts of eye contact followed by looking away coyly. You should also watch for negative cues including leg crossing and arm crossing as this says that a person is not interested and is closing themselves off. Disinterested women will also tend to ask fewer questions and shrug their shoulders more often.

Minutes 4-6

The next several minutes will be used to create more rapport and also permit more affirmative nonverbal cues. This is where “palming” will take place where the palms of the hands are turned upward as if offering themselves. This is where people may make verbal compliments, even though, by any measure, being so verbally overt is rare.

Minutes 7-9

This is where compliments are done away with. This is however, where women will begin to open up a little more and express some personal details. Men will use their gaze more to show interest.

Minutes 10-12

Women will open up and show happiness and a joyful demeanor while palming, but only if they are still interested. Women will also open up more and continue to share personal details. Men will show their attraction by lowering the voice pitch which is distinguishable from the onset.

 

Overall Observations

The most salient message of attraction was being happy and joyful. This includes being agreeable and saying “yes” and nodding more often. Next was offering flirtatious glances and laughing or smiling. The rarest was offering compliments or teasing. Perhaps this might be due to the fact that they are more risky and high stakes nonverbal courtship rituals. The negative cues signaling dislike included leg crossing. If the legs were crossed at any point, then it was a clear signal that someone was not attracted to the other person. If men were seen crossing their arms, this was a solid signal of disinterest. Self-touching of the arm, chest or hair was also a signal of disinterest. Women who shrug a lot and don’t encourage conversation by asking questions was also a signal of dislike.

 

 

The Five Flirtatious Styles

 

The study also outlined five main ways that people tend to flirt with another person based on their personality.

Flirting styles are broken down into five main categories:1) Physical, 2) Traditional, 3) Sincere, 4) Polite and 5) Playful. 1) Physical Flirts: Tend to use touch more often and nonverbal communication generally. These did not do as well in a face-to-face sitting style get-to-meet-you. They excel in more open environments.

2) Traditional Flirts: Traditional male flirts tend to believe that they should take the first step. “Traditional” female flirts were more demure. They tended to show their wrists and hands by “palming” or turning their hands upward. These women also tended to gently tease their partners.

 

3) Sincere Flirts: “Female sincere flirts laughed and smiled more, and more frequently showed a telltale sign of interest — the coy gaze,” Hall said. However, those having a “sincere style” tended to be more open to communication through self-disclosure and focused attention. They, were also less likely to self-touch or be fidgety. This was even more evident in the men.

 

4) Polite Flirts: The “polite” flirts were more complex and difficult to read, according to the researchers.

“A polite flirt tends to be very hands-off and respectful, but as you can imagine, this type of flirting isn’t obvious to the people they’re attracted to,” Hall said. “They lean back, create even more space and are more even in verbal tone. For most people, it signals a lack of closeness, but polite flirts do it more the more attracted they become.”

When attraction was present, the polite flirts engaged in less self-touching overall and had a lower pitched voice. They also tended to ask fewer questions in the first half which was especially so in females in first part of the interaction. When men were attracted to their partner they nodded and said “yes” more often but were less likely to move closer. Men also teased their partner less even if they were physically attracted to her.

The polite flirt tends to create more space as a way to encourage trust, however, this means that it is more difficult for them to demonstrate their interest.

 

5) Playful Flirts: Playful flirts who were attracted to their partner tended to protrude their chest especially in the 7-9 minute interval during the conversation. As well, the playful flirts tended to use more compliments especially in the first 3 minutes. When attraction was present, self-touch was also less common. Women, also tended to ask fewer questions when attracted to their male partner, but use more flirtatious gazes in the 4-6 minute interval and shrug more often. The playful male flirts tended to cross their legs less, especially in the beginning minutes.

 

Nonverbal and Verbal Flirtatious Cues From Most to Least Frequent

 

1. Being joyful (smiling and laughing) 2. Affirmation (nodding, saying yes) 3. Keeping the conversation going 4. Opening your arms 5. Disclosing personal details 6. Being expressive 7. Gazing at your partner 8. Being vocally animated 9. Speaking with a higher pitch 10. Self-touching (hair, face, body) 11. Playing with cards* 12. Leaning forward 13. Biting or licking lips 14. Asking questions 15. Shaking your head 16. Playing with objects (clothes, etc) 17. ‘Presenting’ breasts 18. Self-deprecating comment 19. Moving closer 20. Crossing legs 21. Shrugging shoulders 22. Open-palm gestures (palming) 23. Falling into your chair 24. Flirtatious glances 25. Compliments 26. Teasing