Conflict Resolution Style

Conflict can be detrimental when it is intense and frequent. However, when conflict is resolved or managed well, it can promote growth in relationships. It can provide opportunities for re/negotiating boundaries, explore alternative thoughts, take new perspectives and as a result, bring people closer together.

This questionnaire strives to identify conflict resolution/management styles. Read the questionnaire, then respond to each item as best you can. If you are not be able to print it, record your answers on a sheet of paper while you go through the questionnaire. (which i already answered and paste the scores below.) Compute your score per directions, then determine what your predominant conflict resolution style is.  Then complete Discussion .

Score for “complacent” conflict strategy: 30

2

Score for “competing” conflict strategy:25

3

Score for “compliant” conflict strategy:25

4

Score for “compromising” conflict strategy:25

5

Score for “collaborating” conflict strategy:30

 

Please complete the reading, Conflict Resolution Questionnaire  before preparing Discussion  which i already answered to those questions and above are my scores. please answer the questions A, B or C base on all i attached.

Discussions must be 625 words minimum in length (minus copied questions, direct quote, must have at least 2 quotes ), contain specific details and demonstrate an understanding of the readings and activities through application of theories, concepts and terms.

1. I would like to emphasize that if the question requires that you discuss 2 concepts from a perspective, then 2 concepts from a single perspective must be discussed . Discussing a concept each from 2 or more different perspectives will result in a loss of points because discussions may not be as in-depth a they should be.

2. All thoughts and ideas that are not your own, must be cited (in-text, as well as referenced). This is of utmost importance because failure to do so will constitute plagiarism, with consequences such as failing the assignment or the entire course. It is impossible to discuss theories and concepts without citing sources because they are not our own ideas. Text citations or references must be according to APA -style.

3. When discussing concepts, they must be clearly identified, then defined (with in-text citation, and referenced at the end) , and explained in your own words, then applied to life examples if the questions asks for it.  Personal stories alone without including concepts/theories, will not earn high points for discussions.

4. Proofread for spelling and grammatical errors.

Discuss only  A, B, or C.

A. 1. What is your predominant conflict resolution strategy? 2. How effective has it been in resolving/managing conflict? 3. Do you think your conflict strategies are situational? (Do you employ different strategies in different situations, or are they stable across situations?) 4. What is one thing you would like to change or reinforce pertaining to your strategy? 5. Was there any instance in your life when conflict actually brought you closer to the other person? What do you think contributed to that outcome? Share only what you feel comfortable sharing. https://moodle.csun.edu/theme/mPower/pix/s/smiley.gif

B.

Discuss at least 5 considerations that couples, or individuals make before deciding on parenthood. State if these considerations are important, and why.

C.

Think about how your parents brought you up, and how you are parenting your children now, or, if you do not have children, what you observe in the parenting of children in your family by relatives. What differences do you see? Are these micro-, or macro-level variables that have led to those differences?

Conflict Resolution Styles Questionnaire

and

Interpretive Notes

Introduction

Conflict is a fact of life. Of itself conflict is neutral – it is neither good or bad. However the interpretation people place on conflict and conflict situations results in a behavioural response of their choosing.

They may think it wise to avoid the conflict altogether – to walk away from it.

They may think of it as threatening a relationship which they value.

They may think of it as a competitive situation in which they want to be the winner.

They may think that give and take is the best way out of a conflict.

They may think that a conflict is a problem to be solved in a sensible way for the benefit of both parties.

Whatever their chosen response it will have an impact on the other party and that impact could be seen as neutral, positive or negative.

By identifying your preferred conflict resolution style, and identifying the preferred styles of others, you can manage and influence conflicts to a conclusion which should result in a win/win for both parties – the best outcome of a conflict.

This document contains a Conflict Resolution Styles Questionnaire plus explanatory notes.

Complete the questionnaire on yourself and then analyse your preferred styles using the explanatory notes which follow.

Then think about how you can improve your approach to conflict resolution.

Conflict Resolution Questionnaire

The statements listed below can be thought of as descriptions of some of the different strategies for resolving conflicts.

Read each of the statements carefully. Using the following scale, indicate how typical each statement is of your thoughts and/or actions in a conflict situation. Put your score in the box to the left of the statement.

5 = Very typical of the way I think and/or act in a conflict

4 = Frequently typical of the way I think and/or act in a conflict

3 = Sometimes typical of the way I think and/or act in a conflict

2 = Seldom typical of the way I think and/or act in a conflict

1 = Never typical of the way I think and/or act in a conflict

1. I do not like conflict and will avoid it whenever I can.

2. I strive to get my own way in conflict situations.

3. I generally let others get what they want if it means that the relationship remains positive.

4. Compromise in conflict situations is always a good thing.

5. Achieving a win/win outcome is best in conflict situations.

6. If someone wants to get into an argument with me I would rather walk away.

7. As long as I get what I want in a conflict then I am happy.

8. I do not resist the demands of others particularly if forcefully put.

9. I resolve conflicts by meeting the other party half-way.

10. Collaborating in conflicts produces the best results

11. I see conflicts as negative and to be avoided at all costs.

12. I believe that giving in to the demands of others shows weakness.

13. I value positive relationships with others more than getting my own way.

14. A little bit of give and take goes a long way in resolving conflicts

15. I use creativity to solve seemingly impassable problems in conflict situations.

16. In a group conflict situation I stay quiet and do not contribute.

17. Conflicts have winners and losers and I make sure that I am the winner.

18. To stay popular with others I like to give them what they want.

19. I regard conflicts as negotiations where both parties do not get all that they want.

Consulting with others and really understanding their needs gets the best results in conflict situations

20. I see no point in getting involved in conflict situations.

21. I use personal willpower to get my way in conflicts.

22. In a conflict I use humour and a soft touch to prevent escalation of the conflict.

23. Accommodating the other person makes for the best outcome in conflict situations.

24. It is possible for both parties to a conflict to get 100% of what they want if they are creative enough.

25. If I think that a situation will turn into a conflict I avoid it.

26. I do not mind not telling the truth in conflicts if it means that I get my way.

27. I can ‘blow with the wind’ in conflict situations.

28. I normally aim to get half of what I want in a conflict situation.

29. I value the result as much as the relationship with the other party in a conflict situation.

30. If someone wants to draw me into a conflict I tell them I don’t want to get involved.

31. I think flexibility in conflict situations is a sign of weakness therefore I stick to my demands until they are met.

32. I do not put my needs above the needs of others in a conflict situation.

33. For an easy life why not just compromise.

34. Open and honest communication in a conflict leads to the discovery of unexpected and positive outcomes.

Results

Complacent	Competing	Compliant	Compromising	Collaborating
—————1	—————2	—————3	—————4	—————5
—————6	—————7	—————8	—————9	—————10
—————11	—————12	—————13	—————14	—————15
—————16	—————17	—————18	—————19	—————20
—————21	—————22	—————23	—————24	—————25
—————26	—————27	—————28	—————29	—————30
—————31	—————32	—————33	—————34	—————35
————–Total	—————Total	—————Total	—————Total	—————Total

The higher the score for each conflict strategy, the more frequently you tend to use the strategy. The lower the total score for each conflict strategy, the less frequently you tend to use the strategy.

1. Complacents

They prefer to avoid conflicts or they cannot be bothered to get into conflicts. They give up their personal goals and relationships. They stay away from the issues over which the conflict is taking place and from the persons they are in conflict with. Complacents believe it is hopeless to get involved in conflicts. They do not feel the need to act. They believe it is easier to withdraw from conflict than to face it. They find conflicts simply not worth the effort to address.

2. Competers

They try to overpower the other party by forcing them to accept their solution to the conflict. Their goals are highly important to them, and relationships are of minor importance. They seek to achieve their goals at all costs. They are not concerned with the needs of others. They do not care if others like or accept them. They assume that conflicts are settled by one person winning and one person losing. They want to be the winner. Winning gives them a sense of pride and achievement. Losing gives them a sense of weakness, inadequacy, and failure. They try to win by attacking, overpowering, overwhelming, and intimidating others.

3. Compliants

To them the relationship is of great importance, while their own goals are of little importance. They want to be accepted and liked by others. They think that conflict should be avoided in favour of harmony and that people should discuss conflicts without damaging relationships. They are afraid that if the conflict continues, someone will get hurt, and that would ruin the relationship. They give up their goals to preserve the relationship.

4. Compromisers

They are moderately concerned with their goals and their relationships with others. They seek a compromise; they give up part of their goals and persuade the other person in a conflict to give up part of their goals. They seek a conflict solution in which both sides gain something the middle ground between two extreme positions. They are willing to sacrifice part of their goals and relationships in order to find agreement for the common good.

5. Collaborators

They highly value their own goals and relationships. They view conflicts as problems to be solved and seek a solution that achieves both their goals and the goals of the other person. They see conflicts as a means of improving relationships by reducing tension between two persons. They try to begin the discussion that identifies the conflict as a problem. By seeking solutions that satisfying both themselves and the other person, they maintain the relationship. They are not satisfied until the tensions and negative feelings have been fully resolved.

The collaborative style has been shown to be strongly associated with constructive resolution of conflicts, whereas the forcing approach is associated with ineffective conflict management.

The Five Different Styles

Below you will see a summary overview of the five styles. Each style is the result of two concerns:

· A concern for Results

· A concern for Relationships

Each style creates a different outcome.

· Competers may ‘win’ but at the expense of the relationship (I win/you lose).

· Compliants may retain the relationship but fail to get what they want (I lose, you win).

· Compromisers settle for second best (I get half of what I want and so do you).

· Complacents do not get involved and the result is lose/lose (I lose, you lose).

· Collaborators aim for win/win outcomes in which they use creativity to ensure that both parties get all that they want.

Responding to the Different Styles

To manage and influence the five different styles follow the guidelines below.

Competers

· Be assertive (lower your tone of voice, speak more slowly, engage with direct eye contact).

· State your needs clearly (Use “I” language):

· “I need……”

· “What I need from you is …..”

· “I must have …..”

· Repeat your needs

· “I understand your needs at the same time I need…”

· Summarise/paraphrase for understanding:

· “So what you are saying is…”

· Question to stay in control and to build understanding.

· Walk away from the conflict if the person is being unreasonable.

Compromisers

· Resist their request to ‘split the difference’:

· “I cannot agree to that…”

· “That’s not the outcome I need”

· “Before we look at that let’s look at other solutions…”

· Explore a variety of solutions which will result in both parties getting all their needs met.

· Be creative; reframe the problem.

· Use facts and figures to change the other person’s perspective.

· Take your time. Do not be rushed into quick fix solutions.

· Move the other person into a more collaborative mind set:

· “Let’s look a fresh at this together…”

Compliants

· Be aware that they will not be assertive or challenge you so invite them to do so.

· Reassure them that the relationship will not suffer in the longer term.

· Send lots of “you” signals:

· “Could you tell me more…”

· “What do you think…”

· “You seem uncertain. Why?”

· “How can I reassure you….”

· “Let’s revisit what you need to get out of this…”

· Speak calmly; do not be too assertive.

· Use questions to draw the person out.

· Smile, nod and build agreement as you go along; value the person and their views.

Complacents

· Challenge them to engage in the conflict.

· Question them for their reason for not doing so.

· Build them up; reinforce the value of their contribution.

· Reassure them that it is a worthwhile situation for them to get involved in.

· Spell out benefits of their involvement.

· Request them to get involved. Use silence to reinforce the power of your request.

Collaborators

· Refer to the conflict as a problem to solve.

· Use a lot of “we” language:

· “Perhaps we could look at this together…”

· “How could we view the problem from a different angle?”

· “How can we get a win/win outcome out of this…”

· Use a variety of creative problem solving techniques.

· Encourage the other person when progress is being made on solving the problem.

· Use positive, open body language.

· Be open to being challenged and to new ideas.

· Work with the other person as an equal, a “partner”.

Reflective Exercise

List down the names of people with whom you find it difficult to resolve conflicts. What is their preferred style? What can you do to manage them more effectively.

Name	Their Conflict Resolution Style	Actions I need to take

Concern for Results

 

COMPETERS

 

COLLABORATORS

 

COMPLACENTS

 

COMPLIANTS

 

COMPROMISERS

 

Concern for Relationships

 

High

 

Low

 

Low

 

High