Draft And Final Essay On Western Culture

/in /by

separate both the draft and the essay

Learning Activity 3 Instructions

Background to the assignment: In Chapter 17 you read about the development of the university and its various intellectual expressions of entertainment, such as in literature and several styles of visual and performing arts. These forms of expression included the literary, visual and performative representation of values and ideas of the culture in Europe at the time. The university provided Western Culture with newly expanded views of Science and Liberal Arts, including philosophy and theology. These developments had an influence on the direction that the culture was headed.

Literary– could be spoken or written account of connected events; story.

Visual– (paintings, sculptures, textiles, architecture)

Performing Arts– (dance, film, music, theatre, performance art).

Description of the assignment: In America and Western Culture today, how do the areas of education (university) and our forms of arts and entertainment (literary, visual, performing arts) affect the development of values and ideas of Western Culture. Please give examples and specific areas as well as how they affect Western Culture.

Your discourse must indicate that you have an understanding of this influence. If you include sources, you must cite your sources in current APA format. This assignment must be 250–300 words and must include the word count in parentheses. Submit a draft of your Learning Activity to SafeAssign for feedback a few days before the assignment is due.

https://online.vitalsource.com/#/books/9781307304176/cfi/303!/4/2@100:0.00

The Adventures Of Eddie Fung ESSAY PROMPT

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THE ADVENTURES OF EDDIE FUNG

 

 

 

THE ADVENTURES OF EDDIE FUNG

C H I N A T O W N K I D · T E XA S C O W B OY · P R I SO N E R O F W A R

EDITED BY JUDY YUNG

U N I V E R S I T Y O F W A S H I N G T O N P R E S S · S E A T T L E & L O N D O N

 

 

The Adventures of Eddie Fung is published with the assistance of a grant from the

naomi b. pascal editor’s endowment, supported through the generosity of

Janet and John Creighton, Patti Knowles, Mary McLellan Williams, and other donors.

Copyright © 2007 by Judy Yung

Printed in the United States of America

Designed by Pamela Canell

13 12 11 10 09 08 5 4 3 2

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any

form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopy, recording, or any

information storage or retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.

University of Washington Press

P.O. Box 50096, Seattle, WA 98145, U.S.A.

www.washington.edu/uwpress

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Fung, Eddie, 1922–

The adventures of Eddie Fung : Chinatown kid, Texas cowboy, prisoner of war

/ edited by Judy Yung.

p. cm.

Includes bibliographical references and index.

isbn 978-0-295-98754-5 (pbk. : alk. paper)

1. Fung, Eddie, 1922– 2. Chinese Americans—Biography. 3. Chinatown (San Francisco,

Calif.)—Biography. 4. San Francisco (Calif.)—Biography. 5. Cowboys—Texas—Biography.

6. World War, 1939–1945—Participation, Chinese American. 7. World War, 1939–1945—

Prisoners and prisons, Japanese. 8. Soldiers—United States—Biography. 9. Prisoners of war

—United States—Biography. 10. Prisoners of war—Burma—Biography.

I. Yung, Judy. II. Title.

e184.c5f86 2007 940.54’7252092—dc22 [B] 2007019488

The paper used in this publication is acid-free and 90 percent recycled from at least 50 percent

post-consumer waste. It meets the minimum requirements of American National Standard

for Information Sciences—Permanence of Paper for Printed Library Materials, ansi z39.48–

1984.8A

Cover photo: Eddie lighting a firecracker in Chinatown during the New Year celebration,

1935. Courtesy San Francisco History Center, San Francisco Public Library.

 

 

FOR LOI S AND ALL MY BUDDIES IN THE LOST BATTALION

 

 

 

C O N T E N T S

P R E F A C E · I X

A C K N O W L E D G M E N T S · X V

I N T R O D U C T I O N · X V I I

O N E · G R O W I N G U P I N C H I N A T O W N · 3

T W O · A C H I N E S E C O W B O Y I N T E X A S · 4 5

T H R E E · A G O O D S O L D I E R · 6 8

F O U R · A P R I S O N E R O F T H E J A P A N E S E · 9 6

F I V E · A P O W S U R V I V O R · 1 3 9

S I X · L E A R N I N G T O L I V E W I T H M Y S E L F · 1 6 3

C H R O N O L O G Y · 2 0 9

N O T E S · 2 1 1

B I B L I O G R A P H Y · 2 1 9

I N D E X · 2 2 3

 

 

 

P R E F A C E

I first met Eddie Fung in the summer of 2002. I was working on my fifthbook, Chinese American Voices: From the Gold Rush to the Present, andI needed a World War II story, preferably one told from the perspec- tive of a Chinese American veteran. I asked Colonel Bill Strobridge, a mil-

itary historian who had conducted a study of Chinese Americans in World

War II, if he could find me someone to interview. He came up with two

possibilities. The first person had fought heroically in the front lines at Nor-

mandy, but he turned out to be a poor storyteller, one who gave short

answers and stuck to the facts. Even though I conducted the interview in

Chinese and did my best to make him feel comfortable, I could not get him

to elaborate on the story or share his feelings on the matter. So I made

arrangements to meet the second possibility, Eddie Fung, hoping that he

would prove to be a more engaging storyteller.

We agreed to do the interview at Colonel Strobridge’s home in San Fran-

cisco. Prior to the interview, I did some background checking on Eddie Fung.

I found out that he was an American-born Chinese who had grown up in

San Francisco Chinatown like me, only he had preceded me by two

decades. I was fifty-six years old, and he had just turned eighty. Colonel

Strobridge also told me that Eddie had the dubious distinction of being

the only Chinese American soldier to be captured by the Japanese during

World War II and that he had worked on the Burma-Siam railroad made

IX

 

 

famous by the film Bridge on the River Kwai. Not knowing much about that

history, I made a point of seeing the film before the interview. I was horrified

by the brutal treatment of the prisoners under the Japanese and impressed

by the courage and heroic actions of the POWs in the film. I hoped that

Eddie would be forthcoming with details about how he as a Chinese Amer-

ican had fared and survived under such circumstances. The other inter-

esting thing that I found out about Eddie was that he had run away from

home to become a cowboy when he was sixteen. I was intrigued—a Chi-

nese American cowboy? Although it was the World War II story I needed,

I decided I would start at the beginning with his family history in order to

get a fuller picture of his life and to put his World War II experience into

a larger context.

Having conducted over 400 interviews with Chinese Americans for var-

ious book projects by then, I thought I had allowed plenty of time for his

story—three whole hours. This interview, however, turned out differently.

A solidly built man of short stature—5 feet 3 inches, and 120 pounds, to be

exact—Eddie proved to be a natural storyteller with a fantastic memory

for details, a precise way of expressing himself, a wonderful sense of

humor, and a strong determination to tell the story right. In essence, he is

every oral historian’s dream come true. He also proved to be an unusual

interviewee in that he was both introspective and analytical in his responses.

I soon found out that he had an indirect way of answering my questions,

often recreating conversations and connecting specific incidents from the

past to make his point. Regardless of how long-winded he got, Eddie was

never boring. In fact, he held me spellbound at our first meeting, and before

I knew it, three hours had passed and we had not even gotten to World

War II! Somehow, I got the rest of the story out of him in the next two

hours before I had to leave for my next appointment. He gave me a pile of

books to read about POWs and the Burma-Siam railroad, and I promised

to send him the transcript and edited story for his approval.

It was not until I transcribed his interview that I realized what a gold

mine I had found. I thought, this had to be how historian Theodore Rosen-

garten must have felt when he happened upon Nate Shaw, an illiterate black

sharecropper in Alabama with a story to tell, or how Alex Haley felt when

he was asked to write Malcolm X’s autobiography. They both spent hun-

X · P R E F A C E

 

 

dreds of hours interviewing their subjects and countless more writing their

classic oral histories, All God’s Dangers: The Life of Nate Shaw and The Auto-

biography of Malcolm X. I knew instinctively that there was a larger book

to be written, although I did not think at the time that I was the right per-

son to write it. Six months later, after I had completed a draft of his World

War II story for Chinese American Voices, I contacted Eddie and hand-deliv-

ered the transcript and story to him for his approval. At the same time, I

urged him to consider writing his memoirs, but he said with modesty that

his story was not that unique or interesting. “Besides,” he said, “I’m not a

writer.” I continued, however, to press him, and suggested that we do a

longer interview. “If nothing else,” I said, “we could deposit the tapes and

transcript in an archive for the historical record and for the use of other

researchers.” He reluctantly agreed. Retired and a recent widower, he had

the time. For me, the time was right as well, because for the next nine months

I was on sabbatical from my job as professor of American Studies at the

University of California, Santa Cruz. Until then, my research and writing

had primarily focused on Chinese American women. I never thought that

I would be working on a book about a man’s life, but the opportunity was

too good to pass up.

We began meeting on Saturdays in the kitchen of his North Beach flat.

I would set up the tape recorder and come prepared with questions about

a certain period or aspect of his life. The agreement was that we would see

how far we could take his story and that he would be completely open and

honest with me. Although I kept reminding him that he had the right to

refuse to answer any questions that made him feel uncomfortable, he never

did—not even when I asked him about how he lost his virginity. At one

point in our interviews, Eddie said, “You’re the only one who knows the

intimate details of my life. I’ve never even told my wife Lois.” I felt hon-

ored by his complete trust in me and pleased by his willingness to cooper-

ate with me fully. Each session ran for about four hours. I became enthralled

by his story and by his voice. In between our sessions, I would transcribe

the entire interview and come up with follow-up questions for our next

session. One thing for sure, I felt very comfortable with him and looked

forward to each of our weekend sessions.

Into our fifth session together, the unthinkable happened. We were sit-

P R E F A C E · XI

 

 

ting on opposite sides of the kitchen table, as usual, and were on the topic

of post-traumatic stress disorder and how Eddie had found a way to deal

with the anger he felt after the war. “The first thing to do is to admit you

have a problem and then what are you going to do about it?” Then he slipped

in, “Just like I would like to come on to you, except that I know that our

age difference—I mean, there’s just no percentage for it. So the only thing

I can do is enjoy your company while you’re here, and that’s it. You under-

stand?” Then, almost in the same breath, he moved on to an incident in

his childhood when his father taught him how to quell his flash temper.

Later, when I listened to the tape and heard what he had tried to tell me, I

felt flattered and troubled at the same time. I did not want to jeopardize

or compromise our professional relationship and the book that was mate-

rializing so well. And there was the age difference—he was old enough to

be my father. After some lengthy telephone conversations in the next few

days, we decided to give in to Cupid’s arrow but continue on with the book

project. Fifty more hours of interviews later, we were married on April Fool’s

Day 2003. We deliberately chose that date because we did not think any of

our family or friends would believe us.

In retrospect, our marriage helped rather than hindered the interview

process and my understanding of how Eddie’s character has been shaped

by his family background and upbringing, his life as a cowboy in Texas,

and his POW experience during World War II. His life story confirms the

wise sayings “We are the sum total of our experiences” and “What does

not break us makes us stronger.” As his wife and (as he calls me) “his

Boswell,” I had immediate access to him and his extensive library collec-

tion on World War II, and I was able to ask him many personal questions

as well as conduct follow-up interviews whenever I wanted. Indeed, I learned

to keep the tape recorder ready and close by in case he came up with any-

thing important and relevant in our daily conversations. In this way, we

completed another twenty-five hours of recorded testimony. I also had

access to his family and relatives, and his POW buddies, all of whom I met

after we were married. However, as I soon discovered, no one really knows

Eddie Fung very well, since he is a very private person. He has been espe-

cially reluctant about speaking of his POW experiences except to other

POWs who share a similar past. As he said, “There is a common bond

XI I · P R E F A C E

 

 

between survivors that you cannot get membership into unless you have

paid the initiation fee. This is true of all survivors—they can talk between

and among themselves, but with great reluctance and difficulty to anyone

else.”

As my husband and the subject of the book, Eddie entrusted me with

the writing of his story, but he had the final say over every word in the telling

of that story. I gave him every chapter to review and correct as I wrote it,

and we went over the final revisions together with a fine-tooth comb. Admit-

tedly, I have influenced the outcome of the interview in my choice of ques-

tions and emphasis of focus because of my interest in Chinese American

and women’s history, but I have tried to provide Eddie with ample oppor-

tunities to add subjects or delete anything he did not want included. After

transcribing all the interviews, which amounted to over 1,000 pages of text,

I edited and rearranged selections from his interviews for a smoother read,

while trying to remain faithful to his actual words and way of speaking. At

times I relied on other published accounts and oral history interviews (see

the bibliography) in order to add details or corroborate Eddie’s version of

the story. Ultimately, The Adventures of Eddie Fung is very much a collab-

orative life history project and autobiography of a Chinatown kid, Texas

cowboy, and POW survivor, as told from his memories and in his own

words. Using Rosengarten and Haley as my models and marshalling all my

knowledge, sensitivities, and skills as a Chinese American historian and

writer for this monumental task, my goal has been to do justice to Eddie’s

story as a survivor and to share with readers the many lessons in life that

his story has to offer.

P R E F A C E · XI I I

 

 

 

A C K N O W L E D G M E N T S

Our deepest gratitude goes to the late Colonel Bill Strobridge, for intro-ducing us to each other, and to Ruthanne Lum McCunn, the Fungfamily, and the Yung family, for their unflagging support and encour- agement from the beginning of our relationship through the end of this

book project.

We wish to also acknowledge the following people for assisting us with

our research. Members of the Lost Battalion and the Fung family who shared

their memories of Eddie’s past with us include the late B. D. Fillmore, Willie

Hoover, George Lawley, the late Paul Leatherwood, Luther Prunty, the late

Otto Schwarz, Jessie Jing, and Raymond and Fair Fung. Ronald Marcello,

director of the Oral History Program at the University of North Texas, pro-

vided us with transcripts of interviews he had conducted with Eddie’s war

buddies and guided us to other important sources of information. Harry

Ogg, librarian at the Midland County Public Library, kindly ran down

answers to our questions regarding the history and culture of Texas. Him

Mark Lai and Hiroshi Fukurai helped us with the Chinese place names and

Japanese phrases. And the interlibrary loan staff at McHenry Library, Uni-

versity of California, Santa Cruz, tracked down every book we asked for.

Our difficult search for photographs to go with Eddie’s story was greatly

facilitated by the resourceful staff at the Bancroft Library, California His-

torical Society, San Francisco Public Library, Southwest Collection Library

XV

 

 

of Texas Tech University, and Australian War Memorial. Assistance and

photographs were also provided by Robert Dana Charles, Philip Choy, Bill

Fung, Grace Fung, Raymond and Fair Fung, Rosalie Griggs, Fred Haring,

Herbert and Esther Ho, Ken and Yoshiko Ho, Montgomery Hom, Otto

Kreeft, Amanda Lee, Joy Rasbury McLaughlin, Luther Prunty, and Vivian

Thompson. The maps were drawn by cartographer Ellen McElhinny.

Our heartfelt thanks go to Gavan Daws, for his advice and inspiration;

to the following reviewers, who gave us critical feedback on the manuscript:

Valerie Matsumoto, Ruthanne Lum McCunn, Franklin Ng, Irene Reti, Juli-

ana Rousseau, and Helen Zia for their critical feedback on the manuscript;

and to Naomi Pascal, Kerrie Maynes, and the staff at the University of Wash-

ington Press, for their expertise and assistance in bringing The Adventures

of Eddie Fung to light.

XVI · A C K N O W L E D G E M E N T S

 

 

I N T R O D UC T I O N

T he way Eddie Fung tells his life story, it has been one adventure afteranother, beginning with the time he ran away from home to be a cow-boy to the time he joined the army and became a prisoner of war. At one level, The Adventures of Eddie Fung is a coming-of-age story, of a young

man’s quest to explore life to its fullest and in the process grow into man-

hood. At another level, Eddie’s story offers us valuable insights into China-

town life in the 1920s, the myth and reality of the American cowboy, and

the survival tactics of a POW.

Very little has been written about the experiences of American-born Chi-

nese in the early twentieth century. Only two autobiographies exist: Pardee

Lowe’s Father and Glorious Descendant and Jade Snow Wong’s Fifth Chi-

nese Daughter. Both books were published by major publishing houses at

a time when U.S.-China relations were at their best and little was known

about Chinese Americans.1 The authors go to great lengths to explain Chi-

nese family life and customs to an American audience and at the same time

recount their problems dealing with intergenerational conflict at home and

assimilation into mainstream society. Ultimately, Pardee Lowe and Jade

Snow Wong demonstrate to readers how it is possible to “blend the

conflicting streams of Chinese and American thought” and transcend racial

prejudice without feeling embittered or immobilized. As Wong wrote in

XVI I

 

 

the 1989 edition of her book, “Despite prejudice, I was never discouraged

from carrying out my creed; because of prejudice, the effort is ongoing.”2

Eddie Fung tells a distinctly different story of Chinese American life in

the 1920s and 1930s. He does not speak in the voice of a cultural ambassa-

dor, to satisfy the curiosity or assuage the guilt of white America, but from

the retrospective perspective of a wayward son who has come to terms with

his ethnic identity. Eddie has fond memories of his childhood, bathed in

the love and protection of his family and the old bachelor society of China-

town. He recalls how the family and neighbors pulled together during the

Depression and how his immigrant parents taught him to be frugal, self-

reliant, resourceful, and a responsible member of society.

There is, however, also a dark side to living in Chinatown that Eddie

shares with us. Growing up in the shadows of Chinese Exclusion, when

anti-Chinese laws prohibited Chinese immigration and severely restricted

Chinese American life, he resented the ghetto conditions and mentality of

Chinatown. Many of the Chinese were illegal immigrants who had come

to this country posed as “paper sons” of a merchant or U.S. citizen in order

to circumvent the Chinese Exclusion Act of 1882, which barred the further

immigration of Chinese laborers to this country.3 Eddie’s own father

crossed the Canadian border surreptitiously as the “manservant of a Cau-

casian gentleman.” He later found a way to bring his wife and two adopted

sons from China as a “paper wife” and as “paper sons.” Always fearful of

being discovered and deported, his father never explained to him why

Eddie’s older brothers had different surnames from the rest of the family

or why he could not return to Canada or China for a visit. At the time, Eddie

thought this duplicity and secrecy was just the way it was for people in Chi-

natown. Just about everyone lived in overcrowded tenement apartments

and seemed afraid of venturing outside the boundaries of Chinatown. It

was not until Eddie left home for summer camp and work as a live-in house-

boy that he realized other people did not live the same way. They had spa-

cious houses with front yards and backyards. “Okay, people don’t have to

live in Chinatown in cold-water flats,” he reasoned. Certainly, he did not

want to continue living that way, so he began to plan his escape.

Eddie had another reason for wanting to leave home—he resented his

strict upbringing. Like many other second-generation Chinese Americans,

XVI I I · I N T R O D U C T I O N

 

 

he was expected to do well in American school and Chinese school, to help

out at home, to be obedient and respectful to his elders, to follow Chinese

customs, and to never bring shame to the family by misbehaving. Yet at

American school, through books and movies, and in his contacts with the

outside world, he was encouraged to be a rugged individualist, to speak

his mind, and to pursue any line of work or lifestyle he pleased. Many Chi-

nese Americans at this time were torn between following the Chinese ways

of their parents and following the American ways of mainstream society.4

Eddie learned to accommodate cultural conflicts as they arose. “You might

say that our generation had split personalities,” he explained. “When we

were inside the house, we were completely Chinese. When we were out-

side the house, we could be either all Chinese or all American or half and

half.” Being the curious and rambunctious kid he was, Eddie could not

always meet his parents’ expectations, nor be satisfied with the restrictions

of Chinatown life. Yearning to explore the wider world and to pursue the

romantic life of a cowboy on horseback, he decided to strike out on his

own and try his luck in Texas. This decision would set Eddie apart from

his Chinese American peers, most of whom remained stuck in Chinatown

until World War II, when racial discrimination lessened and opportuni-

ties opened up for them.

By the time Eddie arrived in Texas in 1938, the Depression was drawing

to a close and the cowboy days of cattle drives and open ranges that he had

dreamed of were long gone. After the railroads came to Texas, getting the

cattle to market became easier. Fewer men were needed to drive the smaller

herds of cattle to the shipping points. Fenced ranching allowed ranchers

to keep track of their cattle and to improve on their breed, but it meant

that cowboys could no longer roam the open range with the cattle. Most

work became seasonal, when cowhands were needed for the spring and fall

roundups and branding. The rest of the year they were put to work main-

taining windmills, repairing fences, and doing farm chores. Instead of the

idyllic life Eddie had imagined, where “all you have to do is ride a horse

and maybe herd a few cows,” it turned out to be nothing but hard work.

Any experienced cowpuncher could have told him, “He [would be] poorly

fed, underpaid, overworked, deprived of sleep, and prone to boredom and

loneliness.”5

I N T R O D U C T I O N · XIX

 

 

Considering how small in stature and how inexperienced Eddie was, it

is amazing that anyone hired him. Eddie credits his success in landing a

job to his eagerness to learn and his willingness to accept the low wage of

ten dollars a month. His success also attests to the openness and friendli-

ness of ranchers who were willing to give a young man an opportunity to

prove himself. As Eddie found out, there was less racial discrimination on

the ranch than in town. In 1940, African Americans and Mexicans made

up 15 percent and 12 percent of the population in Texas, respectively. They

each formed about 14 percent of the cowboy population. Although Jim Crow

codes were still strictly enforced, cowboys of color were tolerated on the

ranch as long as they had the skills to do the job.6 In contrast, there were

only 1,785 Asians (Chinese and Japanese Americans) in Texas in 1940,

accounting for less than 1 percent of the population. Most of the Japanese

were rice farmers in the Houston area, while the Chinese operated laun-

dries, cafés, and grocery stores, and lived in segregated communities in El

Paso and San Antonio. Small in number and not considered an economic

threat to the Anglo population, the Chinese occupied a “gray area” in the

black-white racial hierarchy in Texas. They were tolerated and better

treated than African Americans and Mexicans, although in 1937 Anglo com-

petitors did try to get an anti-alien land law passed that would have driven

Chinese grocers out of business. The measure failed, however, due to oppo-

sition from the Chinese community.7

Eddie Fung may well have been the only Chinese cowboy in West Texas

at the time, and as such he was treated more as a novelty than a threat. As

he said, “I was only five feet tall and nonthreatening, so most people took

me to be nothing more than a young adventurer.” The one Chinese stereo-

type that stuck to him, however, was that of the proverbial cook or house-

boy. Eddie was offered that job more than once, but each time he refused,

even though it meant higher wages and easier work. He had come to Texas

to be a cowboy, and by the end of his second year he had proven to him-

self and to others that regardless of ethnicity or size he could do any job

assigned to him.

From the vantage point of a Chinatown kid, Eddie shares with us what

it was like to be a Texas cowboy in the 1930s. His first job at the Scarborough

ranch taught him that cowboys worked hard from sunup to sunset. He had

XX · I N T R O D U C T I O N

 

 

to be a jack-of-all-trades—part mechanic, part vet, and part carpenter—

in order to do all the tasks required of him. At his first roundup, Eddie

learned how to flank a calf that was three times his weight. He also came

to appreciate the code of conduct that most Texas cowboys still abide by—

a mixture of rugged individualism, neighborly cooperation, and a strong

sense of honor. “If a man gave you his word, there would be no need for

a contract,” Eddie said. “And if you wanted to be formal about it, you shook

hands—that was ironclad.” Contrary to the image of the uncouth and une-

ducated cowboy he had seen on the movie screen, most of the cowboys he

came to know were gentle, courteous, and knowledgeable, and they were

more than willing to show this greenhorn the tricks of the trade.8 By the

time Eddie was ready to move on to his next adventure, he realized how

much he had grown under their tutelage. What he did not know then was

how this education would help him become a good soldier and survivor

in prison camp.

Most young Texans who joined the National Guard in the 1930s did it

for the pay. Some did it for adventure or to make military service their career.

But as far as Eddie was concerned, “Here’s another place where I can be

around horses—I can join the cavalry!” By the time he got to Lubbock,

Texas, to inquire about joining the army in May of 1940, Italy had seized

Ethiopia, Japan had invaded China, and Germany had swept through most

of Europe. Unbeknownst to Eddie, the United States was heading for war,

and plans were being made to call for the draft and to mobilize the National

Guard. Too young to be admitted into the army without parental consent,

Eddie signed up with the Texas National Guard instead. Although he was

the only Chinese American in his military unit, he never felt out of place

and recalls that he got along fine with all the other men. His size posed more

of a problem than his race or ethnicity. But once he proved that he could

pull his share of the weight and pass basic training, he earned the respect

of his officers and fellow soldiers.

Approximately one million African Americans, 33,000 Japanese Amer-

icans, and 15,000 Chinese Americans served in the U.S. armed forces dur-

ing World War II. Until desegregation in the military was banned by

executive order in 1948, African Americans were segregated into separate

barracks and units and generally assigned menial duties. Because Japanese

I N T R O D U C T I O N · XXI

 

 

Americans were considered “enemy aliens” after Japan attacked Pearl Har-

bor, they were only allowed to serve in the Military Intelligence Service

in the Pacific theater or in the all-Japanese 100th Battalion and 442nd Reg-

imental Combat Team in the European theater. In contrast, Chinese Amer-

icans were integrated into all branches of the military, with the exception

of 1,200 men who were assigned to two all-Chinese units in the China-

Burma-India theater.9 With China and the United States at war against

Japan, many Chinese Americans joined out of a strong sense of Chinese

nationalism and American patriotism. Like Eddie, they experienced no

blatant discrimination, and many would agree with Private Charles Leong,

who wrote in 1944, “To G.I. Joe Wong in the army, a ‘Chinaman’s Chance’

means a fair chance, not based on race or creed, but on the stuff of the

man who wears the uniform of the U.S. Army.”10 In truth, Chinese Amer-

icans were caught between the white-over-black paradigm of race rela-

tions in the army. They did not suffer the same bigotry directed at African

Americans, but neither were they fully accepted as equals by their white

counterparts.11

While Eddie was training to be a machine gunner at Camp Bowie, Texas,

war escalated on the two continents. Germany attacked the Balkans and

Russia, and Japan, now a part of the Axis powers, took the French colonies

of Indochina. As negotiations with Japan deteriorated, President Franklin D.

Roosevelt froze all Japanese assets in America, stopped oil supplies to Japan,

and made General Douglas MacArthur commander of the U.S. Army in

the Far East. Paralyzed financially and starved for the raw materials needed

to keep its war machine going, Japan activated its plans to take over Asia.

In November of 1941, Eddie’s battalion was sent to the Philippines as

reinforcements. En route to the Philippines, he recalls, Pearl Harbor was

attacked, and his convoy was diverted to Australia. From there, the 2nd

battalion was sent to Java to help the Netherlands defend its colonial out-

post. They were no match for the Japanese army. Within a few days, the

battle for Java was over, and Eddie became one of 140,000 Allied soldiers

to be captured by the Japanese in the Pacific theater.12 Along with 61,000

American, British, Australian, and Dutch prisoners, Eddie was sent to work

on the Burma-Siam railroad—the largest use of POWs in any single

project in the Pacific war. For the next forty-two months of captivity, the

XXI I · I N T R O D U C T I O N

 

 

men would suffer unimaginable brutality, diseases, and starvation in the

POW camps. Those who survived the harrowing ordeal would bear the

physical and mental scars of incarceration for the rest of their lives. Thus

the refrain that is familiar to all of them, “We can forgive, but we can never

forget.”

Many books have been published and films made about the Pacific war,

the experiences of POWs, and the building of the Burma-Siam railroad—

the most well known being Bridge on the River Kwai. The 1957 Oscar-win-

ning movie, however, gives a misleading account of how the bridge was

built and destroyed as well as an erroneous impression of the relationships

between the Japanese military, British commander, and prison labor

force.13 More accurate accounts can be found in Gavan Daws’s Prisoners of

the Japanese: POWs of World War II in the Pacific and Clifford Kinvig’s River

Kwai Railway: The Story of the Burma-Siam Railroad.14 By now, there are

also numerous oral histories and memoirs by POW survivors, many of

whom worked on the “Death Railroad.”15 They each tell a different story

about the life of a POW because no one was alike in their reaction to and

interaction with their captors, nor in the way that they perceived and remem-

bered the same events. Gavan Daws points out in his book, “Nationality

determined the way POWs lived and died, and often whether they lived or

died.”16 As Eddie’s story bears out, personality and ethnicity were deter-

mining factors in the matter. What makes The Adventures of Eddie Fung

different from other first-person accounts is Eddie’s unique perspective and

experiences as the only Chinese American to be captured by the Japanese.

According to Eddie, the first thing that crossed his mind after Allied forces

capitulated to the Japanese on March 8, 1942, was, “My God, what are they

going to do to Foo and me?” Eddie Fung and Frank “Foo” Fujita were the

only two Asian American soldiers to be captured by the Japanese in what

has been termed a war between the “yellow” race and the “white” race.17

The assumption was that both would be immediately spotted by the Japa-

nese, then tortured and killed for betraying the “yellow” race. Foo, whose

father was Japanese and whose mother was a white American, was able to

hide his racial background until his Japanese surname betrayed him in

Nagasaki, where he was sent to work in the shipyards while Eddie was sent

to Burma to work on the railroad. Foo steadfastly refused to denounce the

I N T R O D U C T I O N · XXI I I

 

 

United States and participate in propaganda work in Japan, and as a result

he was brutally beaten and assigned to latrine duty.18 As for Eddie, although

he was sometimes beaten because he was Chinese, he was never tortured.

Instead, he found that his Chinese upbringing made it easier for him to

adjust to the meager rice-and-vegetable diet, and to find ways to supple-

ment it with throwaways such as animal organs and fish heads. Even his

limited command of the Chinese language came in handy. It allowed him

to trade with the local Chinese and to help his commanding officer com-

municate in writing with the Japanese engineers. Moreover, the domestic

and scrounging skills he had acquired as a Chinatown kid proved useful in

the camps. For example, Eddie was able to show the cooks how to use a

wok, and the food and medicine he scrounged helped him and others to

survive. In fact, it was while a prisoner of the Japanese that Eddie learned

to appreciate his Chinese background, “I had finally come to terms with

my past, and I was looking forward to going home and telling my mother,

‘Okay, Mom, I understand what you and Pop have been trying to get

through to me—about what it means to be Chinese—and I’m going to try

and live up to it.’”

Ultimately, what kept Eddie alive and what makes his story so unique

and interesting were his curiosity and desire to learn from his adventures

and encounters in life. Even the details of railroad work come alive when

seen through Eddie’s curious eyes—how the Japanese organized the work

crews, how jungles were cleared for the right-of-way, how bridges were built,

how the tracks were laid, and how the men were practically worked to death

during the “speedo” period. To Eddie, “any job is interesting as long as I’m

learning something new.” At the lowest point of his captivity, when he was

hit with dysentery and malaria and down to sixty pounds, Eddie convinced

himself to stay alive for no other reason than to satisfy his curiosity: “I

wanted to see what the next day would bring; whether it was good, bad, or

indifferent, I just wanted to know.”

After the war was over, how did Eddie deal with the scars from his excru-

ciating POW experience? In the final chapter of the book, he talks about

going on eating binges, hoarding twenty pounds of coffee at a time, having

nightmares, going without sleep for a whole year, and losing his temper

over trifling matters. Some of his buddies became alcoholics. A few com-

XXIV · I N T R O D U C T I O N

 

 

mitted suicide. The V.A. Hospital was of no help, because at the time no

one understood what we now know to be posttraumatic stress disorder and

survivor’s guilt. Even so, Eddie found a way to deal with the problem, and

he managed to turn the negative experience into a positive learning expe-

rience. By the time we get to the end of Eddie’s story, we can discern that

he is finally at peace with himself. Upon reflection he said, “I’ve never regret-

ted the war or the hardships I’ve suffered, because it made me a better man.”

The Adventures of Eddie Fung is an important contribution to our under-

standing of Chinese American life, cowboy culture, and the experiences of

American POWs in World War II. It is also a remarkable chronicle of a

Chinatown boy’s journey to manhood that will leave a lasting impression

on our hearts and minds.

—judy yung

I N T R O D U C T I O N · XXV

 

 

 

THE ADVENTURES OF EDDIE FUNG

 

 

 

O N E · G R O W I N G U P I N C H I N A T O W N

Pop named me Man Quong, which means “intellectually bright,” so my father had

high expectations of me. Years later, when I visited our ancestral village in China for

the first time, they knew right away who I was, because Pop had sent money back to

celebrate my birth and I was written in the village genealogy book. From all of this,

I suspect that he must have been very disappointed in me as I was growing up. But

unfortunately, I cannot change my nature. I don’t know why I had itchy feet, why I

was born curious, so curious that I had to see what was on the other side of the hill.

M Y F A T H E R , F U N G C H O N G P O O

M y father, Fung Chong Poo, was a wetback—he sneaked in fromCanada. According to people I talked to later, at one time he livedin Chinatown and worked as a kitchen helper in a downtown hotel in Nanaimo. He crossed the border posing as the manservant of a Caucasian

gentleman—that was how he got into the U.S. My guess is that it was in

the late 1890s, when he was in his early twenties. Dad was from Lei Yuen

(Pearl Garden) village in Enping District, Guangdong Province (near Hong

Kong). My mother, Ng Shee, was from Si Ji Yim (Lion’s Loin) village, also

in Enping District. The funny thing about the Enping people, if you meet

a married woman with the surname Fung, the chances are she used to be

a Ng from somewhere around Si Ji Yim. And if you meet a married woman

with the surname Ng, the chances are she was a Fung. You see, most vil-

3

 

 

lages in China at this time were inhabited by people with the same surname,

and young people in one village were often arranged in marriage to pros-

pective spouses in nearby villages. We’re so intermarried within that area,

it’s almost incestuous!

I had two older adopted brothers who were born in China, and four older

sisters and a younger brother who were born at home like me. My father,

being a progressive man, chose to use a lady doctor instead of a midwife.

The reason we had two adopted brothers was because after my parents got

married in China and before Pop came over to America, it was thought

that Mom was barren. So since he was going to find his fortune in the West,

he decided to adopt two sons to keep her company in China. But when he

finally got her over here in 1914, one year later, my older sister Mary was

born! How did Pop get his wife and two sons over here when he was ille-

gal? He had a brother in San Francisco who had a wife and three sons in

China. As a merchant, he could have brought them to America, but he never

intended to do so. Instead, he sold the papers to my father. Mom came over

legally as my uncle’s wife, and my oldest adopted brother, Al, came as my

uncle’s ten-year-old son, Ho Li Quong.1 Somehow, Pop knew the Chinese

consul general, and in 1939 the consul fixed it so that Mom and Uncle were

divorced, and Mom and Pop got married. As to my second adopted brother,

Francis, or Pee Wee as we called him, Pop was able to buy immigration papers

for him to come in 1920 as Hom Sin Kay, the nine-year-old son of a native-

born citizen. Both Al and Pee Wee retained their paper names because it

would get too complicated. The consul general could only do so much.

This would create all kinds of problems for us later, like when I went over-

seas in November of 1941 and my mother said, “You stop in Honolulu and

find out how Pee Wee is doing.” At the time he was a seaman on the Matson

lines. We had one day in Honolulu, so I went to the Seamans Union. I was

in uniform, and I said, “I want to find out if my brother is in port.” “What’s

your brother’s name?” I said, “Hom Sin Kay.” He said, “What ship is he on?”

I said, “Lurline.” And he said, “Lurline is not in.” So he said, “Who are you?”

I said, “I’m his brother.” So I pulled out my dog tag. He said, “You’re Fung,

Edward. How can he be your brother when his surname is Hom?” I said, “I

don’t know, but he’s always been my brother.” This “paper son” business—

I just never thought anything of it because it was so common in Chinatown.

4 · C H A P T E R O N E

 

 

According to hearsay, Pop was a hell-raiser. When he was a young man,

he wore a pigtail, which was required of all Chinese subjects during the

reign of the Manchus (1644–1911). One day he was running an errand for

his boss and he was impatient. He jumped off the cable car before it stopped

and his queue wound around the stanchion. Basically, he fell under the cable

car—that was how he lost his leg. He learned to be a jeweler and watch-

maker because he had to find some job he could do sitting down. I remem-

ber when I was about eight, he gave me an alarm clock and showed me how

to get started taking it apart. I took it all apart. He said, “Now put it back

together.” I couldn’t do it, and he tried to show me. He said, “It’s perfectly

logical. This has to go in first, then this goes on top of this, and this goes

alongside of it.” It all made sense, but I couldn’t do it. And, theoretically,

the alarm clock is the easiest to repair!

My father was not the kind of man you asked personal questions about.

G R O W I N G U P I N C H I N A T O W N · 5

FIG. 1 . Studio portrait of the Fung family, 1924. Left to right, front row: Grace, Min-

erva, mother Ng Shee (holding William), father Fung Chong Poo (holding Eddie), Mary,

and Jessie; back row: cousin Tom Fung, Albert, cousin Harry Fung, and cousin Fung

Woi Quong.

 

 

If he wanted you to know something, he would let you know. But I could

tell through our little sessions—like the time he taught me how to make a

bow and arrow—that he had many experiences to draw from. One time

in 1937, when we had the coldest winter in many years, he said, “Do you

think this is cold? In Montana I was at a ranch house, and when we threw

a basin of water out the back porch, it would freeze before it hit the ground.

Now that’s cold.” In retrospect, then, you can kind of backtrack and say,

“How did he get into the United States from Canada?” It wasn’t straight

down through Washington and Oregon; he must have taken a roundabout

way, going down through Montana. Another time when I saw the movie

San Francisco, with Clark Gable, Spencer Tracy, and Jeanette MacDonald,

I came home and he asked, “What movie did you see?” And I told him. He

started reminiscing about the 1906 earthquake in San Francisco, and how

he had to stay at an encampment in the army presidio designated for Chi-

nese people. He recalled how as soon as the bugler sounded retreat, which

is the time to lower the flag, the horses would know exactly what they were

supposed to do—pull caissons in formation. He said, “Just like the fire

horses when they hear the fire alarm, they know that they have to go. All

they need is the direction from the driver as to where.” So he was telling

me about the army life that he saw as a refugee from the earthquake. Of

course, I later found out that it was an advantage for the Chinese that the

earthquake happened, because with all the birth records destroyed, they

could then claim U.S. citizenship and help bring in a number of fictitious

sons from China.

My father spoke fairly good English and he was a Christian, so I gather

the reason I was named Edward was because of Reverend Edwards, a

Methodist minister who had taught him English. When we were kids, every

Thanksgiving my father would roast a turkey with all the trimmings, and

he would also bake pumpkin pies. Then the whole family would take the

streetcar and troop out to Sixth Avenue, where the Edwards sisters lived

after the minister died. We always had Thanksgiving dinner with the spin-

ster sisters until they went to live in a retirement home. We knew from that

that Pop felt an obligation to Reverend Edwards. And when Chinese incur

an obligation, it’s lifelong—it’s never paid off.

I also learned later from old-timers about how my father made his first

6 · C H A P T E R O N E

 

 

$10,000. They said that during World War I, he was buying and salvaging

gunnysacks used for bagging potatoes. If they were in good shape, he would

pay a penny for it. If not, people would give it to him and he would spend

his nights patching them. Everyone thought he was crazy because he

rented a warehouse to store all these bags. He foresaw the scarcity of gun-

nysacks (used for bagging potatoes) after the war—that’s how he made his

first bundle of money, selling gunnysacks. Pop was one of these guys who

in the 1920s could see “strip cities,” all the way from San Francisco to San

Jose. He was always traveling to Vallejo, Walnut Creek, and all sorts of places

outside San Francisco, scouting out business opportunities. But if he made

any money, he would use it to help people, not hoard it.

I think Pop helped at least four kinsmen come to the United States. I

used to ask him why, because we could have used the money ourselves. He

said, “No matter how rough you think you have it here, it’s much worse

than you can imagine in China. So anytime I have a chance to help bring

someone over, I will.” And he said, “I will not deprive you of any food,

shelter, or clothing—you have the basics. All I want to do is give someone

else the opportunity to have the same things.” He used to buy land in China

from my uncle, who wanted the money more than the land, since he had

no intention of ever going back to China. Pop was always helping out his

village. I think they had some bandit problems one time. I remember so

distinctly—Pop and Al were wrapping cartridges of .38–caliber bullets in

toilet paper. Then they hid them in a grindstone before shipping it to China.

I asked Al years later what that was all about, and he said, “We had to smug-

gle these cartridges to the villagers who had guns but could not buy any

ammunition. Bandits were extorting money from the villagers for so-called

protection.” So that was why they needed the bullets—to try and fend off

the bandits.

My father kept a book of the monies that he had lent or expended to

help bring people over from China. Theoretically, there was an agreement

that the person’s family would pay him back if and when they could afford

it. In other words, the debt was on the book. When my father passed away

in 1940, Mom asked Al to try and collect some of the money. It turned out

that people were not as ethical as Pop had thought. Many of them said,

“We’ve already paid the debt back and your father must have forgotten to

G R O W I N G U P I N C H I N A T O W N · 7

 

 

mark it down.” Other people would deny that they were even indebted to

my father. So after a couple of weeks of that, Mom told Al, “Put a notice

in the Chinese papers that the Fungs do not owe anyone, nor are the Fungs

owed by anyone else.” In other words, the slate’s wiped clean. She figured

if anyone was going to honor his debt after the notice, he would still pay

it. And it was at that point that the Fungs got a reputation for being choi

gee lo (wealthy people), because they could afford to write off the debts.

But that wasn’t true—Mom just didn’t want the aggravation.

You might say that my father was progressive in the way that he treated

the girls in the family. Whenever his friends kidded him about having so

many girls, he would say, “My girls are better than any of the sons you have.”

Back in those times, that was high praise because girls didn’t really count

for much. But he was that kind of a person. He didn’t care whether you

were male or female. If you brought pride to him, you were bringing joy

to him. When my sisters graduated from the prestigious Lowell High School

and they wanted to go on to college, my father encouraged them to do so.

All his peers laughed at him, “Why are you letting your girls go to college?

They’re just going to get married and raise families.” He told them that

education was something no one could take away from you. It didn’t mat-

ter if his daughters got married and had families, they could still be edu-

cated. All the girls went to the University of California, Berkeley. Mary went

for optometry in 1938, and upon graduating she opened her own office

at the corner of Sacramento and Grant. Jessie majored in anthropology

and worked as a bookkeeper for Sherwin–Williams Paint Company before

marrying Bill, an electrical engineer, and moving to Bakersfield. Number

three, Minerva—we called her Mints—studied literature at Cal. She met

and married Jim, a Caucasian guy who later became a psychologist. My

parents did not approve; neither did his mother. Back then, they could not

get married in California, so they got married in the state of Washington,

where it was allowed.2 My fourth sister, Grace, never attended college

because she had asthma. Early on, when she was twelve or thirteen, she was

sent to live with a family in Fresno, which would hopefully help her asth-

matic condition.

Although my father was gentle and supportive of his daughters, he was

hard on his sons. Have you ever heard the term sa heng? It’s a rattan whip.

8 · C H A P T E R O N E

 

 

That was what Pop used on my younger brother Bill and me whenever we

did something bad—the usual kid stuff, like fighting or sneaking into the-

aters without paying or shoplifting at the dime store. We didn’t have any

toys, so naturally when we were in a variety store and saw all these things,

we would shoplift. Whenever Pop found out about it, he would whip us in

no uncertain terms, saying that he didn’t want this sort of thing happening

again. Anytime he whipped us, we had given him a reason—there was no

question about that. It wasn’t child abuse. He was just trying to get a point

across: there was proper behavior and there was improper behavior.

I would not go so far as to say that my father was a dictator. He often

tried reasoning with me. One time after I had been reported fighting again,

he took me aside and said, “Men reason, animals fight.” Another time he

admonished me by saying that my behavior reflected poorly upon him as

the father, and, by extension, the family name and the clan. He never went

any further than that. He probably decided, if nothing else—even if I were

puzzled by what he had said—maybe I would start thinking about it. I

remember I used to have a flash temper and I would go around slamming

doors in the house. One day my father was home and he saw that I was

mad about something. After about four doors, he said, “Do you feel bet-

ter now?” And I said, “What?” He said, “All that door slamming, what are

you mad about?” And he said, “After you’re done slamming all those doors,

do you feel any better? Has your problem gone away? Whatever you were

angry about, it’s still there, right?” And I knew he was right.

M Y M O T H E R , N G S H E E

If Pop was the head of the household, Mom was the heart of the house. If

we had a scrapped knee or a skinned elbow, we would go to Mom, and she

would kiss it and make it well. If we had a problem that needed solving,

we would go to Pop, although he just basically handed out edicts. Mom

came from a fairly poor background, judging by the fact that she did not

have bound feet.3 As far as I know, Mom’s father was an itinerant herb dealer,

and her brother was physically handicapped, so she had to take care of him

all the time.4 She never talked about herself except in a very peripheral way.

For instance, when Bill and I would come in hot from play and we would

G R O W I N G U P I N C H I N A T O W N · 9

 

 

stick our heads under the faucet to drink cold water, Mom would be hor-

rified, because she had seen cholera in her village. Of course, we told her,

“Mom, this is America. Things like that don’t happen.” Every morning,

she boiled a pot of water, put it in the tea caddy, and that was the water

she drank. It was only when I saw the effects of cholera in the POW camps

that I realized why it had made such a deep impression on her. When the

girls started working and had a little money set aside, they asked my mom,

“Would you like to go back to China for a visit?” She said, “Me go back

there, where there’s no running water and flush toilets? Absolutely not!”

So Mom didn’t have any romantic notions about what she had left. She

was perfectly content, even though we didn’t have much. One of the things

I remember she always said when people were having problems adjusting

to a new environment, she would always say jun sui, meaning “change of

water.” In other words, they had gone to an area where the water was dif-

ferent. I will never forget that, especially later in the camps, where every

drop of water that passed our lips had to be boiled.

My mother was a housewife and she worked as a seamstress at home. She

did very fine hand sewing of tailored suits, where she put in the linings in

the suit coat, the vest, and the pants. And she hand made the buttonholes

and sewed on the buttons. All she got was twenty-five cents a suit. It was con-

sidered a favor by the tailor to even give her that kind of work, because there

were lots of people who would have been glad to have the work. She also

made all our clothes—pants and shirts—on a Singer foot-treadle machine.

When she found out from the sewing ladies that there were such things as

hemmers and buttonhole attachments, she expressed one time that she wished

she could have these attachments. So Pop went down to the Singer sewing

machine display room and looked to see how these things were made. Then

he came back to his shop and with scrap pieces of tin and copper, he tried

to make what Mom wanted. Now these things were for electrical machines,

so he would make it, try it out on Mom’s machine, and if it didn’t work exactly

the way it was supposed to, he would take it back and modify it until he got

it just right. So Mom got all these attachments meant for electrical machines

for her foot-treadle machine, and that made her job a lot easier.

My dad never went to school, but he was self-educated. My mom, on

the other hand, was illiterate in both Chinese and English. I guess with all

10 · C H A P T E R O N E

 

 

those kids, she never had time to learn English, even if Pop were willing to

teach her. So when we started learning to speak English, Pop said, “Inside

the house you will speak Cantonese, because it would be disrespectful to

your mother. She would not understand a word you’re saying.” He also

told us that in the company of strangers we should not speak Chinese

because, regardless of what we were saying, they might take it the wrong

way. When Mom wanted to go shopping, like at the Emporium, she would

come to Commodore Stockton School and ask for me. The principal would

know why she was coming. I would take her wherever she wanted to go

and help her carry the packages. Then, of course, she always bargained.

My sisters would tell her, “If the Emporium says it’s nineteen cents a yard,

you can’t bargain.” She might buy ten yards and she would say, “Ask the

salesgirl if it would be cheaper.” So I said, “Mom, they won’t.” She said,

“Ask them anyway.” I loved my mom dearly, so I would always ask. And

the salesgirl would inevitably say, “No, it’s not our policy.” I would tell Mom.

Then she was happy that I had asked. She couldn’t make change, so she

would hold out the money in her hand. She was never cheated, as far as I

could see. We were never embarrassed by what my mom did because we

realized that there was something in her background that made bargain-

ing a part of her character. I remember her saying that in China she saw

meat for sure once a year, and that was at New Year’s, and maybe on her

birthday. None of us, even living as we did in Chinatown, could quite pic-

ture that, because we always had food on the table.

My fondest memory of my mom has nothing to do with her working

and slaving her fingers to the bone. My oldest brother’s wife and Mom both

had long hair, and we’re talking about as far down as to the waist if it’s hang-

ing free. I remember Ah So (Auntie) and Mom would sit sort of side by

side and they would groom each other’s hair. Then, of course, they would

braid it and wear it in a gai (bun). Mom had enough hair that she had to

have two buns. Back in those days, we didn’t even have shampoo. Mom

used Chinese soap to wash her hair and pow fah (paste made from wood

shavings) to dress it. Then I think it was around 1933 or ’34 when the girls

talked Mom into cutting off her hair. I know that for a lady it is a lot of

weight on her scalp, and the care of the bobbed hair is a lot easier, but I

sure missed that long hair.

G R O W I N G U P I N C H I N A T O W N · 11

 

 

My other fond memory of my mother would be her cooking. Mom was

a good cook. I don’t know where she got the training or how she learned

it, but whenever relatives from Stockton came to town, they would hand

Mom fifty dollars and all they wanted was for Mom to cook her special-

ties. And we all got to be participants in this feast—we were all going to

eat. Now, her specialties were always bird’s-nest or shark-fin soup—

depending on which one the relative wanted: fried squab; West Lake duck;

fried prawns; a dish of sea cucumber, abalone, and mushrooms; steamed

chicken; steamed fish; and a vegetable dish.

The chicken and squab had to be fresh. There used to be poultry stores

on Grant Avenue, right across the street from the old opera house. Mom

would feel the breast and pick the one she wanted. She never had the mar-

ket do the killing or cleaning—same thing with the squabs, even though

she might be buying as many as four or six, depending on the size. She didn’t

want me to see her kill the squab, so she would strangle it inside a bag. Then

we would defeather them, which was made easier by dipping them in hot

water first. The reason she retained the blood in the carcass was so that when

she deep-fried it, it would have that nice moist, dark color. With the chicken,

she would cut the throat and drain the blood. That was when I learned about

blood pudding. She would put the blood into a bowl and steam it. Blood

pudding wasn’t served at the banquet; it was just a question of not wast-

ing it. Then Mom would have me help her pluck the chicken, and she would

clean the insides and save the gizzards, the liver, and so on. If she had time,

she would even save the chicken intestines and clean them thoroughly on

the outside. Then she would take a chopstick and turn the intestines inside

out and clean the inside, and then do the outside again, do the inside again,

and make sure it was thoroughly clean. The intestines she would serve as

a side dish to the family on another day. I learned early on from my mother

that nothing should be wasted. So it was fairly natural for me, when I was

in the prison camps, not to waste anything either.

My mom hardly left home except to go shopping. Naturally, every chance

we had, we would try to get Mom out of the house and basically not be so

concerned about whether all the clothes had been washed and ironed. I

mean, the chores were endless when you consider there were six kids and

no modern conveniences. Aside from the Chinese opera, she loved the

12 · C H A P T E R O N E

 

 

movies, especially the comedies, so every once in a while, my sisters would

take her downtown to see movies like Alice in Wonderland or Tom Sawyer.

The girls said Mom couldn’t understand a word of English, but she knew

exactly when to laugh and when to cry. Once they found out that she could

enjoy a movie without understanding a word of English, they would take

her more often. But usually her movies were confined to Chinatown. There

were at least three theaters that showed Chinese movies during the day-

time because at night they were converted to opera houses. She went maybe

once or twice a month. I know it was only a nickel for me, and maybe ten

cents for an adult. I didn’t especially like the Chinese movies, but since Mom

enjoyed them, I didn’t mind going with her. But she definitely liked slap-

stick, and we never figured out how she picked that up.

G R O W I N G U P P O O R A T 8 4 2 W A S H I N GT O N

Our family was not dirt-poor. There were no luxuries, but we had the

basics—a roof over our heads, clean clothes—even if they were mended—

and nutritious food. For the first nine years of my life, we lived at 842 Wash-

ington Street, on the third floor. There were five families on that floor. We

had two rooms, for a total of nine people. All four girls slept in one room,

and the three boys had the front room, which served as the living room in

the daytime, the dining room at night, and our bedroom after dinner. There

was a hall closet in between, where Mom and Pop slept. And they cut off

an area no more than two feet by three feet for Mom’s three-burner gas

stove—that was her cooking space. There were two toilets and one com-

munity kitchen on our floor, and all the water came from that kitchen. Every

Saturday night, we would bring water in by the buckets and use every con-

tainer we had to boil water, and everyone would take turns taking a bath

in the number-two washtub. It was a continuous water-bucket parade!

Everyone in Chinatown lived like this. There were people in the building

who lived in more restricted circumstances than us—four or five people

in one room. Yet they managed as we all did.

I remember hand-me-downs in the sense that we didn’t always have new

clothes and new shoes. There was one pair of shoes that I just hated. I don’t

even remember where they came from. They had no shoelaces and required

G R O W I N G U P I N C H I N A T O W N · 13

 

 

a buttonhook to connect the mating hooks together. I could have sworn

the shoes were made out of iron, because they never showed any signs of

wear. Thank goodness I finally outgrew them! Even when we bought new

shoes, we always bought them much larger so that we could grow into them.

The one thing that I resented about hand-me-downs was sometimes I had

to wear my sister’s undies. Hand-me-downs, that’s exactly what it means—

handed down. When the girls had outgrown them, they were passed down.

And if it just happened you were a boy—that was tough!

With my father’s earnings as a watchmaker, we always managed. I don’t

remember ever eating breakfast until we started junior high school, but for

lunch we had a piece of pastry or bread with milk. Our main meal together

was supper, and that was when Mom would cook rice, soup, some veg-

etables, and a little meat. She would send me down to the Chinese grocery

store to buy two and a half cents’ worth of beef, two and a half cents’ worth

of pork, and that would be the meat ration for the day. Then, of course,

14 · C H A P T E R O N E

FIG. 2 . Storefronts below 842 Washington Street, where Eddie lived in the 1920s. The

waiter is delivering a tray of restaurant food that he balances on his head. Courtesy

Bancroft Library, University of California, Berkeley.

 

 

the vegetables—two bunches of gai choy (mustard greens) for a nickel, three

bunches of bok choy for a nickel. In our time, you could chaan (ask for

free) some chong (green onions), mien seen jeong (bean paste), or some liver.

Any of the animal organs were free. Butcher town was down on Evans Street,

and every Friday a big truck would come to Waverly and Washington with

all these organs—tripe, hearts, stomachs, livers, kidneys, and so on, from

all kinds of animals—and we could take anything we wanted. Any other

time we wanted liver, we would go to any Chinese grocery store, prefer-

ably one that relatives ran or had shares in, and we would ask for a piece

of liver for our cat. Everyone knew that the Fungs didn’t have a cat, but

they knew that we had six kids, so they would give us a commensurate-size

piece of liver. That was so that we didn’t lose face. We were going to help

each other out, period. Otherwise, nobody was going to survive.

The only time we ever splurged was at Chinese New Year’s. Mom would

make the traditional vegetarian dish, jai, and we would have chicken for a

change. She would also take out the beautiful, ornate wooden case with the

compartments for the various sweetmeats. We could look, but “no touch,”

and definitely “no take.” We knew it was for display and to impress the

guests. Even the guests never really took things from the trays. If someone

were visiting with kids, the parents would make sure that they didn’t try

to empty out the compartments. Later on, we would get a treat, and my

favorite was the sugared coconut peelings. Of course, we always looked for-

ward to getting li see (lucky money in a red envelope) from the adults. This

was how we worked it: We had six kids in our family, and the Wong fam-

ily on our floor had two girls. Now, suppose Mrs. Wong gave six of us a

quarter each—that would be a dollar and a half. So Mom would keep track,

and what happened was that Mom would make sure that the Wong fam-

ily got back a buck and a half. The Wongs couldn’t afford to give us a buck

and a half, and we couldn’t afford to give them six bits for each girl. But

on the other hand, if we kind of kept track, we could each follow the tra-

dition of giving kids li see, and there would be no net loss. We never kept

the money from the li see, but every once in a while, Mom would say we

could keep a nickel. The money was usually kept in circulation.

Everyone was expected to help out as much as they could. Mom sewed

at home, and I remember the girls started out picking shrimp at a factory

G R O W I N G U P I N C H I N A T O W N · 15

 

 

on Clay Street. But after they got lice in their hair, Mom said, “No, no, we’re

going to do this at home.” They basically worked in the living room of our

small apartment. But after a year of that, my father put a stop to it, saying

that it was more important for the girls to keep up with their schoolwork.

I remember one other job we all took a hand in was wrapping Chinese char-

acters that were printed on sheets of paper for the Chinatown lottery. We

would all sit around the dinner table and bundle up sets of Chinese char-

acters and put them in boxes. It was a lot of work for a penny a box. Later,

the girls took on babysitting jobs outside Chinatown to bring in extra

income.

If you didn’t help out earning spare change, you could always help out

at home— cleaning house, getting water from the common kitchen, cook-

ing, and so on. But everyone was expected to help in some way, and as we

got older, we had more responsibilities. So I never had what was called a

“childhood.” I started helping around the house when I was five or six years

old, and I started working as a shoeshine boy when I was eight. It was a

nickel for a shine. I would go over to Portsmouth Square with my shoe box

filled with shoe polishes and brushes and ask people if they wanted a shine.

Another place I would go to was the bail bond office on Merchant and

Kearny, where the policemen sometimes hung out. By and by, I developed

a steady clientele, and certain people would wait for me to come by to give

them a shoeshine.

Then, when I was about nine years old, I started delivering newspapers.

Tommy Yip, who lived across the hall from us, had a paper route with about

100 papers or subscribers. He offered me ten dollars a month to deliver half

of the papers. Tommy was responsible for delivering the other half, and

also for collecting from each subscriber. Later, I found out that each sub-

scriber paid seventy-five cents a month for their subscription. So, for 100

papers, that would be seventy-five dollars. From that seventy-five dollars,

Tommy paid San Francisco News fifty dollars, so he got twenty-five dollars.

Well, he paid me ten dollars, so he was still ahead by fifteen dollars. But

then, he could lose money if a subscriber defaulted, and ten dollars seemed

like pretty good money to me. The first month I got my ten dollars, I walked

up to Mom and I handed her the ten dollars, and I told her how I had earned

it. She said, “No, Man (my Chinese name), I keep half and you keep half.”

16 · C H A P T E R O N E

 

 

That’s the way it was—she would never take all my money. When I got my

own paper route and was making a little more money, she still only took half.

T H I N G S G E T B E T T E R A T 1 3 0 T R E N T O N

Somehow Pop saved enough money to buy a two-story house at 130 Tren-

ton Street in Chinatown, and we were able to move there in 1931. Com-

pared to 842 Washington, it was luxurious. We had four bedrooms—one

for Mom and Pop, one for the girls, one for Al and his family, and one for

Bill and me. There was a living room, a kitchen with hot running water,

and a bathroom with a bathtub and toilet. The house also came with a back

yard that Pop made into a garden. He loved to garden, and I remember

he had a camellia bush that was the envy of Chinatown. We had a light

well and windows in the front rooms, so the place was well lighted and

ventilated.

G R O W I N G U P I N C H I N A T O W N · 17

FIG. 3 . Two boys—possibly

Eddie and his brother Bill—

shine shoes in Portsmouth

Square, 1930s.

 

 

I remember my sister Grace telling me years later that as soon as she got

her first full-time job, she decided, “I’m going to get Mom a treat.” She

went to Montgomery Ward and she picked out a range and a refrigerator.

She told the store to deliver it to 130 Trenton and set it up. She came home

that night from work, looked around—no range, no refrigerator. She asked,

“Mom, didn’t someone deliver anything today?” She said, “Oh, some crazy

lo faan (foreigner) tried to bring a stove and an icebox in here. I told him

I didn’t order anything and shooed him away.” She said, “But Mom, that

was for you, I got them for you.” She looked at Grace and said, “I don’t

need a range; I don’t need an icebox—don’t spend your money that way.”

Finally, Pop went down to the used furniture store on Pacific and Stock-

ton and picked up a range for ten dollars, and, of course, like any sensible

Chinese woman of her time, Mom used the oven for storing pots and pans.

As for the range, Mom said, “I don’t need a range; gas burner is fine.” Pop

said, “No, now you have four burners.” So, okay, she won’t fight it, and

she went ahead and started using it.

After my sisters started working and making more money, they asked

her, “Don’t you want a washing machine?” She said, “I don’t need that.”

We’re talking about hand scrubbing the sheets and cleaning all our com-

forters every once in a while. She would have to unbaste the linen and the

cover, and she would wash all those and air out the batting, and all this by

hand. Mom was one of these people who can always manage, even if a catas-

trophe were to hit. I mean, as far as she was concerned, she had hot water

that came out of a tap, she didn’t have to boil it on the stove—that was

good enough for her. Mom taught us to work under any condition. Most

people would call it primitive, but I think to her, it was just basic survival.

I never heard her complain, although she had plenty of reasons to. She just

took the attitude, “What good is it going to do to complain? The condi-

tions aren’t going to get better because you complain.”

It was strange that I got to be so close to my mom, because it’s usually

the girls who get close to their moms. What was it Oscar Wilde said? “All

women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That’s

his.” You know, he’s right! The first time I realized I could help Mom out

was after we had moved to Trenton Street. She was washing sheets and

clothes for at least eight people in a number–two washtub. She now had a

18 · C H A P T E R O N E

Indian Meditation Paper

/in /by

Gurus and Spiritual Friends

Task: Spiritual teachers of different sorts have long been considered important for meditation practice in South Asia.  Their significance varies, however, in different traditions.  In Buddhist traditions we have seen Thich Nhat Hanh offering basic Theravada teachings and Kathleen McDonald (an ordained nun) presenting Tibetan Mahayana meditations; in the film The Lion’s Roar, we saw the Karmapa, his four spiritual sons (called Rinpoches), and the U.S.-based teacher Chogyam Trungpa.  In Hindu-oriented traditions we have seen Swami Vivekananda, Ramana Maharshi, Kabir and Paltu (see O’Flaherty reading pages 139-142), and Osho/Rajneesh.  Making reference to at least two of these teachers, write an essay that examines some possible roles that teachers can play in contemplative practice.  You might consider questions such as the following: In what ways do the teachers invoke authority from scripture (or not)?   If the teacher is thought to have achieved perfection or enlightenment, to what extent is that perfection or enlightenment important for the role he or she plays for disciples?  How, further, might disciples see their teacher as a being with access to higher realities: does the teacher have some extraordinary cosmic status?  To what extent do any differences among the teachers stem from the teachers’ roles in a particular society at a particular time, the type of practices they offer, and the doctrines of the religious traditions from which they come?

Write about four (and no more than five) double-spaced pages. As always, understanding of the material, depth of insight, and coherence of argument will be crucial to your grade.  And remember: the extended questions in the prompts are merely suggestions to help you start thinking: you are in no way limited by them or obliged to answer any of them.

For those who want to answer this question with reference to Osho/Rajneesh, we are offering a collection of his discourses on meditation as a source

PDF Attached named “Meditation_the_first”

O’Flaherty reading pages 139-142 PDF name is “Hinduism_Dan_Gold

BHAGWAN SHREE RAJNEESH

MEDITATION

A PRACTICAL GUIDE TO MEDITATION COMPILED BY SWAMI DEVA WADUD

THE FIRST AND LAST FREEDOM

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N : T H E F I R S T A N D L A S T F R E E D O M

INTRODUCTION NOTES TO THE READER

ABOUT MEDITATION

THE SCIENCE OF MEDITATION

What Is Meditation? 2 Witnessing, the spirit of meditation

6 The Flowering of Meditation 6 The great silence 7 Growing in sensitivity 7 Love, the fragrance of meditation 8 Compassion 8 Abiding joy for no reason at all 8 Intelligence: the ability to respond 9 Alonenessr your self-nature 9 Your real self

72 Methods and Meditation 12 Techniques are helpful 13 Begin with effort 13 These methods are simple 14 First understand the technique l5 The right method will click 15 When to drop the method 16 Imagination can work for you

18 Suggestions for Beginners 18 Enough space 18 The right place 19 Be comfortable 19 Bcgin with catlrarsis

Guidelines to Freedom The three essentials

xi xvii

2

23 23

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N : T H E F I R S T A N D L A S T F R E E D O M

THE SCIENCE OF MEDITATION

23 23 a u 25 25 28 29

33

Be playful Be patient Dont look for results Appreciate unawarcness Machines help but dont create meditation You are not your experiences The observer is not the witness Meditation is a knack

Dynamic Meditation: Catharsis and Celebration lnstructions for Dynamic Meditation * Giving birth to yourself Remember, rcmain a witness

Tlvo Powerful Methods for Awakening Kundalini Meditation * lvlandala Medintion *

Dancing as a Meditation Disappear in the dance Nataraj Meditation * Whirling Meditation*

Anything can be a Meditation Running, jogging and swimming I-aughing Meditation The laughing Buddha Smoking Meditation

Breath, A Bridge to Meditation Vipassana Watching the gap in the brcath Warching tte gap in the marketplace

THE MEDITAflONS 35 35 38

4l 43 4

45 45 47 48

49 5 l 53 v 55

57 59 62 &

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M E D I T A T I O N : T H E F I R S T A N D L A S T F R E E D O M

THE MEDITATIONS 6 68

69 7 l 74 ’15

79 8 l 82

t5 87 88 90 95 97 98

l0r 103 105 r07

Dream mastery Thrcwing things out

Opening the Heart Frcm head tlr heart hayer Meditation * The heart of peacefulness Heart centering Atisha’s heart meditation Start with yourself

Inner Centering AMullah Finding the real source Center of the cyclone Feel’I am’ Who am I? To the very center ofbeing

Looking Within Seeing within Looking as a whole Inner circle

109 Meditations on Light lll Golden light meditation ll3 Heart of light ll5 Seeing etheric presence ll7 Translucentprcserrce

119 Meditations on Darkness l2l Inner darkness l2t4 Carry out inner darkness

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N : T H E F I R S T A N D L A S T F R E E D O M

THEMEDITATIONS 127 Moving Energy Upwards 129 The ascent of life energy I 135 The ascent of life energy 2

137 Listening to the Soundless Sound 139 Nadabrahma Meditation * 140 Nadabrahma for couples l4l Aum 143 Devavani (Gibberish) * I44 Instruction for Devavani Meditation 144 Instruction for Gibberish Meditation 145 Music as meditation 147 Thecenterofsound 150 Thebeginningandendofsound

153 Finding the Space Within 155 Enter the clear sky 158 Include everything 160 A meditation for the jet-set 161 Feel the absence ofthings 163 Hollow Bamboo

165 Entering into Death 167 Entering ino death l7l Celebrating death

173 Watching with the Third Eye 175 Gourishankar * l’16 Finding the witness 178 Touching as a feather 180 Looking at the tip of the nose

185 Just Sitting 187 7.qzen 189 The laughter ofzen

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M E D I T A T I O N : T H E F I R S T A N D L A S T F R E E D O M

THEMEDITATIONS 193 Rising in Love: A Partnership in Meditation 197 Circle of love 199 Shaking in sex 201 Circle of love alone

?I4 The T$o Difficulties 2U Theego 208 The chattering mind

213 False Methods 2I3 Meditationisnot.concentration 215 Meditation is not inmospection

217 Tricks of the Mind 217 Dont be fooled by experierrces 217 Mind can enter again 218 Mind can deceive you

OBSTACLES TOMEDITATION

QUESTIONS TO THE MASTER

222 225 228 23r 234 236 238 u2 u5 u9 252 256

Only a witness can rcally dance The goose has never been in! The watcher on the hill Where did you leave your bicycle? Just a l80o tum All paths merge on the mountain Celebrating consciousness Tune in to uncertainty Count the moments of awareness Make things as simple as possible Witnessing is like sowing se€ds Witnessing is enough

*YAA-HOO!” A Sound of Celebration The Mystic Rose Meditation

GOING DEEPER: LAUGHTER AND TEARS AND THE WATCHER 26I ON THE HILLS 263

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I N T R O D U C T I O N

he enlightened master Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh is creating a worldwide rebellion for the sake of man’s freedom and meditation. You may think

this is an odd choice. How are they rclated? Yet the sub- tle connection between the two is a crucial point in the understanding of man’s future potential. The door to opening our capacity for love, intimacy, creativity and expansion ri meditation. And according to Bhagwan therc is no other dml no other path. For the pst thirty-five years, Bhagwan has been deci- phering many of the world’s great religious, mystical, and esoteric traditions. His talks are contained in a mon- umental 350 volumes, where he has brought to life countless ancient and contemporary mystics, making tlrc wisdom of their teachings understandable and relevant to our lives today. This book is a compilation drawn from Bhagwan’s pro- found work on meditation. It contains a wide variety of methods which can help us to discover what he calls “Meditation: The First and last Fr@dom.” Bhagwan has said,

“Meditation is not something new; you have come with it ino the world. Mind is something new, meditation is your natue. It is your nature, it is your very being. How can it be difficult?” t

We make it difficult by struggling against something which we think is preventing us ftrom being free, or, by searching for something which we presume will give us

 

 

I N T R O D U C T I O N

freedom. It is actually found simply by relaxing into who we are, living life moment t0 momenL All over the world people are struggling wbe frcefrom something. The sruggle may be against a nagging wife, or a conmlling husband, a domineering parcnt, or a boss at work who is quashing creativity. My struggle was ei- ther a fight against a repressive plitical system or an ef- fort to tee myself of my childhood conditionings through countless thenapies. This struggle did not make me fiee; it was simply a reaction against something which I thought was not allowing me to be ftee. The freedom of meditation is not a search to hnd fiee- dunfor something, either. How many of us have dreams of being in some situation or utopia which would allow us just to relax and be ourselves, free ftrom the competi- tion and tension of everyday life? My experiences have demonstrated to me that the freedom we are searching for does not depend upon something owside ourselves. So what is the freedom we arc longing for? I have heard Bhagwan describe it as “just freedom”: living in the here and now, moment [o moment, living neither in the mem- ory and oppression of the past nor the dreams of tlre fu- ture. Bhagwan has said:

“Eating – simply eat, be with it. Walking – simply walk, be there. Dont go ahead, dont jump here and there. Mind always goes ahead or lags be- hind. Remain with the moment.” 2

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I N T R O D U C T I O N

Many of us have certainly experienced what Bhagwan is saying about the mind. Mind is always jumping ahead or laggrng behind, but it is never in the momenf it is a con- stant chattering. When this chattering takes place, it robs us of being in the moment and living life totally. How can we live totally when our mind is chauering to itself even while we are engaged in daily activities? To illustrate this for yor:rself you can try a small experi- menl Put this book down for a few momens and close your eyes. See how long you can just sit and enjoy the feel of your body, and any sounds that may be around you. The chances are it will not be very long, perhaps only a minute, before your mind stars chauering. If you sit for a while and notice what the chatterings are, you will be amazed: you will find ttnt you are carrying on many dif- ferent incoherent inner conversations with yourself which, if you overfieard someone else saying them out loud, you would think crazy. This constant chattering lit- erally robs us of life, preventing us from enjoying what each moment of life holds for us. So what o do about this outof-control chattering which sepi[ates us frrom, and robs us of, the precious moments of life? I have heard Bhagwan tell us over and over again to meditate. I have heard him say that we can’t stop the chattering mind dircctly, but that through meditation the chattering can slow down and eventually disappear. With meditation the mind becomes a useful instrument.

 

 

I N T R O D U C T I O N

instead of enslaving us with its constant chatter. Howev- eq we often are confused by the profusion of countless meditation techniques which are generally obscure and not relevant for today’s living. Bhagwan has taken these techniques, weeded out $e true from the false, and pene- trat€d to their very core, giving us a key which can open the door to a universe beyond our imagination. This master key is winessrng: a simple but profound s0ate of watching and accepting ourselves as we arc. Bhagwan tells us that

“Witnessing simply means a detached observa- tion, unpejudiced; that’s the whole secret of med- itation.” r

It’s actually so simple tlut I went on mising it for years. We all certainly think we know what watching is; we ob- serve things around us all day long. We watch television, we watch other people go by and notice what they are wearing, what they look like, but we don’t generally watch ourselves. When we do, it is usually though self- conscious criticism. We will notice something about our- selves which we dont like and then start worrying about what others will think. Usually these inner chatterings of the mind make us feel miserable. This is not witnessing. Bhagwan reminds us:

“Nothing needs !o be done; just be a witness, an observel a watcher, looking at the traffrc of the mind – thoughts passing by, desires, memories,

 

 

I N T R O D U C T I O N

dre:trns, fantasies. Simply stand aloof, cool, watching it, seeing it, with no judgment” with no condemnation, neither saying ‘This is good,’ nor saying ‘This is bad’.” e

Through the meditations that are in this book, you will discover what witnessing is. While sitting in Bhagwan’s presence, witnessing just starts happening spontaneous- ly. Moments occur when you are just sitting, listening, feeling, watching whatever is happening with an inner silence. This silence is like the vast empty sky, yet vi- brating with life. Bhagwan’s home is the sky and his very being is silence. His words caress the very depth of the heart” his song is the song of the empty sky.

“Your inner being is nothing but the inner sky. Clouds come and go, planes are born and disappear, stars arise and die, and the inner sky remains Lhe same, untouched, untarnished, unscarred.

“We call trat inner sky satsfuz, the witness, and that is, the whole goal of meditation.

“Go in, enjoy the inner sky. Remembel whatsoever you can see, you are not iL

 

 

I N T R O D U C T I O N

You can see thoughts, then you arc not thoughs; you can see your feelings, then you are not your feelings; you can see your dreams, desires, memories, imaginations, prrojections, then you arc not them. Go on eliminating all that you can see. Then one day a tremendous moment arises, the most significant moment of one’s life, when there is nothing left to be rejected.

“All the seen has disappealed and only the seer is there. The seer is the empty sky. ‘To know it is to be fearless, and to know it is to be full of love. To know il is o be God, is o be immortal.” s

Through this book you are invited to experience your own inner sky. My gratitude and love for Bhagwan cannot be put ino words; only tears can convey my feeling. Through hear- ing his call to freedom I am beginning to awaken to the beauty and grace that each moment of life can bring.

Thank you, Beloved Master. Swami Deva Wadud, Poona, April 1988

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N O T E S T O T H E R E A D E R

How to use the book

n using this book as a guide in meditation you do not have to read it frrom cover to cover before trying any of the meditations. Use the book intuitivelv. Glance

through it and choose some section or meditation that appeals to you. For example, you may prefer O jump right ino one of the meditations in part III and get your feet wet before reading the guidelines. Go by what feels good io you. After choosing a meditation try il for at least three days and if it feels good, continue doing it and go deeper. The important thing is !o experiment playfully and simply ask yourself: Does this meditation help my joy and sen- sitivity to keep gowing?

Meditating to music

Music and meditation can go well together. About this, Bhagwan once said:

‘”To me music and meditation arc two aspects of the same phenomenon. And without music, medi- tation lacks something; without music, meditation is a little dull, unalive. Without meditation, music is simply noise – harmonious, but noise. Wthout meditation, music is an entertainment; music and meditation should go together That adds a new dimension to both. Both are enriched by it.” o

 

 

N O T E S T O T H E R E A D E R

Hence music tapes have been pepared to guide Dynarn- ic Meditation and many of the active methods, including Kundalini, Mandala, Nataraj, Devavani, Prayer, and Gourishankar, as well as Nadabrahma. The music tapes for the meditations are available ftom the distribuors listed at the back of this book.

Material printed in italics

Many of the meditations in part Itr are based on the teachings of various enlightened masters including Bud- dha, Patanjali and Shiva frcrn fudia, Atisha and Trlopa ftom Tibet and the Chine.se mast€r Lu Tsu. Where Bhag- wan quotes their verses or suFas, the selection has been inuoduced with the name of the earlier master in italics. Finally, there are a few selections in this book, for exam- ple the summary instructions for several of tlp medita- tions, which are based on Bhagwan’s teachings but are not actually given in his own words. To show the differ- ence, these pieces have been printed in italics.

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About Meditation

 

 

A B O U T M E D I T A T I O N

Whatis Meditation?

the way your being can remain undisturbed, then slowly you can sart doing things, keeping alert that your being is not stirred. That is the second part of meditation – fint, leardng how just to be, and then leaming little actions: clean- ing the floor taking a shower, but keeping yourself centered. Then you can do complicated things. For example, I am speaking to you, but my meditation is not dis- turbed. I can go on speaking, but at my very center there is not even a ripple; it is just silent, utterly silent So meditation is not against ac- tion. It is not trat you have to es- cape from life. h simply teaches you a new way of life: you be- come the center of the cyclone. Your life goes on, it goes on really

Witnessing, the spirit of meditation

Meditation is adventure, thc greatest adventure the hwnan mind can undertake. Meditation is jtut to be, not doing any- thing – rn action, rn thought, rn emotion. You just are and it is a slwer delight. From where daes this delight come when you are not doing anything? It comes from nowhere, or it comes from everywlere. It is uncaused, because existence is made of the sruff called joy. ‘

f T /hen you are not doing also doing, contemplation is also

Vt/ anything at atl – bodily, doing. Even if for a single moment

Y V menully, on no level – you arc not doing anything and you when all activity has ceased and are just at your center, utterly re- you simply are, just being, that’s laxed – tlut is meditation. And what meditation is. You cannot do once you have got the knack of it, it, you cannot practice it: you have you can remain in that state as long only to undentand il. as you want; finally you can remain Whenever you can find time for in that state for twenty-four hours a just being, drop dl doing. Think- day. ing is also doing, concentration is Once you have become aware of

 

 

A B O U T M E D I T A T I O N

more intensely – with more Joy, with more clarity, more vision, more creativiry – yet you are aloof, just a watcher on the hills, simply seeing all ttrat is happening around you. You are not the doe4 you are lhe watcher. That’s the whole secret of medita- tion, that you become the watcher. Doing continues on its own level, there is no problem: chopping wood, drawing water fiom the well. You can do small and big things; only one thing is not allowed and that is, your centering should not be lost. That awareness, that watchfulness, should remain absolutelv uncloud- ed, undisturbed. z

Jn Judaism there is a rebellious I school of mystery called Has- sidism. Its foundeq Baal Shem, was a rare being. In the middle of the night he was coming from the river – that was his routine, because at the river in the night it was abso- lutely calm and quiet. And he used to simply sit there, doing nothing – just watching his own self, watch- ing the watcher. This night when he was coming back, he pased a rich man’s house and the watchman was standing by the door. And the watchman was puzzled be- carse every night at exactly ttris

time, this man would come back. He came out and he said, “Forgive me for intemrpting but I cannot contain my curiosity anymore. You are haunting me day and night, ev- ery day. What is your business? Why do you go to the river? lvlany times I have followed you, and there is nothing – you simply sit there for hours, and in the middle of the night you come back.” Baal Shem said, “I lnow that you have followed me many times, be- cause the night is so silent I can hear your footsteps. And I know every day you arc hiding behind the gate. But it is not only that you are curious abut me. I am also cu- rious about you. What is your business?” He said, “My business? I am a sim- ple watchman.” Baal Shem said, “My God, you have given me the key word. This is my business too!” The watchman said, “But I dont understand. If you are a watchman you should be watching some house, some palace. What are you watching there, sitting in the sand?” Baal Shem said, ‘There is a little difference: you are watching for somebody outside who may enter the palace; I simply watch lftis watcher. Who is ttris watcher? This is my whole life’s effort; I watch myself.”

The watchman said, “But this is a strange business. Who is going to pay you?” He said, “It is such bliss, such a joy, such immense benediction, it pays iself profoundly. Just a single moment, and all the treasues arc nothing in comparison tro it.” The watchman said, ‘This is strange. I have been watching my whole life. I never c:rme across such a beautiful experience. To- morrow night I am coming with you. Just teach me. Because I know how to watch – it seems only a dif- ferent direction is needed; you are watching in some differcnt direc- tion.” There is only one step, and that step is of direction, of dimension. Either we can be focused outside or we can close our eyes to the ouside and let our whole consciousnes be centered inwards – and you will know, because you are a lnower, yon are awareness. You have never lost it. You simply got yortr awarc- ness entangled in a thousand and one things. Witldraw your awarc- ness from everywhere and just let il rest within younelf, and you have anived home. s

Th. essential core, fte spirit of I meditation is to leam how to

witness. A cmw crowing…you are listening.

 

 

A B O U T M E D I T A T I O N

These are two – object and subject. But cant you see a witness who is seeing both? – the crow, the listeneq and still there is someone who is watching both. It is such a simple phenomenon. You are seeing a trce: you are l}tere, the ree is there, but can’t you find one thing more? – that you are see- ing the Dree, that there is a witless in you which is seeing you seeing the tree.4

\f,prcling is meditation. What V Y vou watch is irrelevanl You

.- *uln the uees, you can walch the riveq you can watch the clouds, you can warch children playing around. Watching ls meditation. What you watch is not the point; the object is not the point. The quality of observation, the quality of being aware and alert – ttat’s what meditation is. Remember one thing: meditation means awareness. Whatsoever you do with awarcness is meditation. Action is not the question, but the qulity that you bring o your ac- tion. Walking can be a meditation if you walk alert. Sitting can be a meditation if you sit alert Listening to the birds can be a meditation if you listen with awareness. Just lis- tening to the inner noise of your mind can be a meditation if vou re- main alert and watchful.

The whole point is, one should not move in sleep. Then whatsoever you do is meditation. s

-fl h. fint step in awareness is to I be very watchful of your body.

Slowly slowly one becomes alert about each gesturc, each movement. And as you become aware, a mila- cle starts happening: many things that you used to do before simply disappear; your body becomes more relaxed, your body becomes morc atluned. A deep peace starts prevail- ing even in your body, a subtle mu- sic pulsates in your body. Then start becoming aware of your thoughts; the same has o be done with thoughts. They are more subtle than the body and of course, more dangerous too. And when you be- come aware of your thoughts, you will be surprised what goes on in- side you. If you write down wha[- soever is going on at any momenl you arc in for a great surprise. You will not believe that this is what is going on inside you. And after ten minutes read it – you will see a mad mind inside! Because we arc not aware, this whole mad- ness go€s on running like an under- current. It affects whatsoever you are doing, it aflecs whatsoever you arc not doing; it affects everything. And the sum tolal of it is going to be vour life! So this madman has to be

changed. And the miracle of aware- ness is that you need not do any- rhing except just become aware. The very phenomenon of watching it changes it. Slowly slowly the madman disappean, slowly slowly the thoughts start falling into a cer- rain pattem; tlreir chaos is no more, they become more of a cosmos. And then again, a deeper peace pre- vails. And when your body and your mind are at peace you will see that they arc attuned to each other too, there is a bridge. Now they are not running in different directions, they are not riding different horses. For the fint time there is accord, and that accord helps immensely to work on the third step – that is be- coming aware of your feelings, emotions, moods. That is the subtlest layer and the most difficult, but if you can be aware of the thoughs then it is just one step more. A little more intense awareness is needed and you start rcflecting your moods, your emG tions, your feelings. Once you are aware of all these thee they all be- come joined into one phenomenon. And when all these three are one – functioning together perfectly, humming togethe4, you can feel the music of all the three; they have be- come an orchestra – then the fourth happens, which you cannot do. It happens on its own accord. It is a

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A B O U T M E D I T A T I O N

gift’fiom the whole, it is a reward for those who have done these ttrce. And the fourth is the ultimate awarcness that makes one awak- ened. One becomes aware of one’s awarcness – that is the fourth. That makes a buddha, the awakened. And only in that awakening does one come to lnow what bliss is.

The body knows pleasure, the mind knows happines, the heart knows joy, the fourth knows blis. Bliss is the goal of sannyas, of be- ing a seeke4 and awareness is the path towards iL 6

The important thing is that you I arc watchful, that you have

not forgotten to watch, that you are

watching …watching…watching. And slowly slowly, as the watcher becomes more and more solid, sta- ble, unwavering, a transformation happens. The things that you wete watching disappear. For tlp f,ust time, tlre watcher iself becomes the watched, the observer iself becomes the observed. You have come home. z

 

 

A B O U T M E D I T A T I O N

The Flowering of Meditation

Meditation is not an Indian method; it is not simply a tech- nique. You cannot learn it. It is a growth: a growth of your to- tal living, out of your total living. Meditation is not something that can be added to you as you are. It cannot be added to you; it can only come to you through a basic transformation, a mutation. It is a flowering, a growth. Growth is always from the total; it is not an addition. Jwt like love, it cannot be added to j-ou. It grows out of you, out of your totality. You must grow towards meditation.a

The great silence

Qilence usually is understood to Ube something negative, some- thing empty, an absence of sound, of noises. This misunderstanding is prcvalent because very few people have ever experienced si- lence. All that they have experienced in

fte name of silence is noiseless- ness. But silence is a otally differ- ent phenomenon. It is utterly posi- tive. It is existential, it is not empty. It is overflowing with a music that, you have never heard before, with a fiagmnce that is unfamiliar to you, with a light that can only be seen by the inner eyes. It is not something frctitious; it is a reality, and a rcality which is al-

ready present in everyone – just we never look in. Your inner world has its own taste, has its own fragrance, has its own light. And it is utterly silent, im- mensely silent, etemally silent. There has never been any noise, and tiere will never be any noise. No word can reach there, but yor can reach. Your very center of being is the center of a cyclone. Whatever happens amund it does not affect it. It is etemal silence: days come and go, years come and go, ages come and pass. Lives come and go, but the etemal silence of your being remains exactly the same – the same soundless music, the same fragrance of godliness, the same transcendence from all that

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A B O U T M E D I T A T I O N

is mdrtal, from all that is momen- tary. It is not your silence. Youare it. It is not something in your posses- sion; you are posessed by it, and that’s the grcahess of it. Even you are not there, because even your presence will be a disturbance. The silence is so profound that there is nobody, not even you. And this silence brings truth, and love, and thousands of other blessings to You. 9

Growing in sensitivity

\ fetution will bring you sen- IYlsitivity, a grcat sense of be- longing to the world. It is our world – the stars are ours, and we arc not foreigners here. We belong inninsi- cally to existence. We are part of it, we are the heart of it You become so sensitive that even the smallest blade of grass takes on an immense importance for you. Your sensitivity makes it clear to you that this small blade of grass is as important to existence as the biggest star; without this blade of grass, existence would be less than it is. This small blade of grass is unique, it is ineplaceable, it has is own individuality. And this sensitiviw will create new

friendships for you – friendships with trees, with birds, with animals, with mountains, with rivers, with oceans, with stan. Life becomes richer as love grows, as friendlines grcws. 10

Love, the fragrance of meditation

f f you meditate, sooner or later I you will come upon love. If you meditate deeply, sooner or later you will srart feeling a tremendous love arising in you that you have never known before – a new quality to your being, a new door opening. You have become a new flame and now you want to share. If you love deeply, by and by you will become aware that your love is becoming more and more medita- tive. A subtle quality of silence is entering in you. Thoughs are dis- appearing, gaps appearing. Si- lences! You are ouching your own depth. Love nrakes you meditative if it is on the right lines. Meditation makes you loving if it is on the right lines. tt

Vou want a love which is born I out of meditation. not bom out

of the mind. That is the love I con- tinually talk about.

Millions of couples around the world are living as if love is there. They are living in a world of ‘as if ‘.

Of course, how can they be joyous? They are drained of all energy. They are trying to get something out of a false love; it cannot deliver the goods. Hence the frustration, hence the continuous boredom, hence the continuous nagging, fighting be- tween the lovers. They are both try- ing to do something which is impos- sible: they arc trying to make their love affair something of the eternal, which it cannot be. It has arisen out of the mind and mind cannot give you any glimpse of the etemal. Fint go into meditation, because love will come out of meditation – it is the fragrance of meditation. Meditation is the flowet the one- thousand-petaled lotus. Lrt it open. L€t it help you to move in tlte di- mension of the vertical, no-mind, no-time, and then suddenly you will see the fragrance is there. Then it is etemal, then it is uncondition- al. Then it is not even directed to anybody in particular, it cannot & directed o anybody in particular. It is not a relationship, it is more a quality that sunounds you. It has nothing to do with the other. You are loving, you are love; then it is eternal. It is your fragrance. It has been around a Buddha, around a Zarathustra, around a Jesus. It is a

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A B O U T M E D I T A T I O N

totally different kind of love, it is qulitatively differenL t z

Compassion

p uddha has defined comPassion I-las “love ptus medilation.” When your love is not just a desfue for the o$er, when your love is not only a need, when your love is a sharing, when your love is rnt that of a beggar but that of an emperoq, when your love is not asking for something in reurn but is rcady only o give – to grve for the sheer joy of giving – tlpn add medigtion to it and the pue fragrance is re- leased, the imprisoned splendor is rcleased. That is compassion; com- passion is the highest phenomenon. Sex is animal, love is human, com- passion is divine. Sex is physical, love is psychological, compassion is spiritual. tr

Abiding joy for no reason at all

or no rciason at all you sudden- ly feel yourselfjoyous.In odi-

nary life, if there is some reason, you are -ioyful. You have met a beautiful woman and you arc -by- ous, of you have got the money that you always wanted and you arc-ioy-

ons, otr you have purchased the house with a beautiful garden and you arc joyous, but these irys can- not last long. They arc momentary, they cannot remain continuous and unintemrpted- If your joy is caused by something it will disappear, it will be momen- tary. It will smn leave you in deep sadness; all joys leave you in deep sadness. But therc is a different kind of joy that is a confirmatory srgn: you arc suddenly joyous for no rcason at all. You cannot pin- point why. If somebody asks, “Why are you so joyous?” you cannot an- swer. I cannot answer why I am joyous. There is no reason. It’s simply so. Now rirs joy cannot be distubed. Now whatsoever happens, it will continue. It is there, day in, day out You may be young, you may be old you may be alive, you may be dyrng – it is always there. When you have found some joy that rc- mains – circumstances change but it abides – then you ale certainly coming closer to Brddhah@d. t4

Intelligence: the ability to respond

what is demanded of you, what is tlrc challenge of the siuration. The intelligent person behaves accod- ing o the sinration and the snpid behaves accoding to the rcady- made answen. Whether they come ftrom Buddha, Christ o Krishna it does not matt€r, He always carries scripues aroud himself, he is afraid to depend on himself. The intelligent person depends on his own insight; he trusrs his own be- ing. He loves and Espects himself. The unintelligent person respects others. Intelligence can be rediscovered The only method to rediscover it is meditation. Meditation only does one thing: it desUoys all the bani- ers that tln society has created o pr€vent you ftom being intelligenr It simply Emoves the blocks. Is function is negative: it removes the rocks that are preventing you wa- ten ftom flowing, your qprings frrom becoming alive. Everybody is carrying the geat po- tential, but society has pt geat rocks o Fr€vent ir It has created China Walls around you; it has im- prisoned you. To come out of all prisons is intelli- gence * and never to get into anoth- er again. htelligence can be discov- ercd through mediteion because all those prisons exist in your mind; they cannot reach your being, fornr-

f ntelligence simply means abiliry Io rcspond, b€cause life is a flux. You have to be aware and to see

8 ;

 

 

nat6ly. fhey carnot pollute your be- ing, they can only pollute your mind – they can only cover your mind. If you can get out of the mind you will get out of Ckistianity, Hinduisrn, Jainisn, Buddhisrn, and all kinds of rubbish will be just finished. You can come to a full stop. And when you arc or$ of ttp min4 watching it, being aware of it” just being a wirrcss, you arc intelligenr Your intelligence is discovercd. You have undone what the society has done to you. You have de- stroyed the mischiefi you have de- suoyed the conspiracy of the priests and the politicians. You have come out of it, you arc a ftee man. In fact you are for the fint time a real man, an authentic man. Now the whole sky is you-s. Intelligence brings fteedom, intelli- gerrce brings spontaneity. 15

Aloneness: vour self-nature

I loneness is a flower, a lonrs .flblooming in your trcart Aloneness is positive, aloneness is health. It is the.by of being your- self. It is the Fy of having your own space. Meditation means: bliss in being alone. One is really alive when one has become capable of it, when

there is no dependence anymore on anybody, on any situation, on any condition. And because it is one’s owrL it can remain morning, evening, day, night” in youth or in old age, in health, in illness. In life, in death too, it can remain because it is not something that is happen- ing to you from the outside. It is something welling up in you. It is your very nature, it is self-nature. to

I n inside journey is a journey lLrcwarus absolute aloneness; you cannot take anybody there with you. You cannot share your center with anybody, not even with your beloved. It is not in the nature of things; nothing can be done about it. The moment you go in, all connections with the outside world are broken; all bridges are broken. In fact, the whole world disappears. That’s why the mystics have called the world illusory, moya, nd’. tltctt it does not exist, but for the meditatu, one who goes in, it is almost as if the world does not exisr The si- lerrce is so profound; no noise pene- trat€s it The aloneness is so deep that one needs gus. But out of that aloneness explodes bliss. Ort of that aloneness – the experierrce of God. There is no other way; there has never been any and tlse is never going to be. tz

/^telebrate aloneness, celebrate \-,your pure spzrce, and a great song will arise in your hearr And it will be a song of awareness, it will be a song of meditation. It will be a song of a lone bird calling in the distance – not calling to somebody in particular, but just calling be- cause the heart is full and wants to call, because the cloud is full and wants to rain, because the flower is full and the petals open and the fra- gfince is rcleased…unaddre.ssed. l€t your aloneness become a dance. tr

Your real self

\ rfeditation is nottring but a de- IVIvice to make you aware of your real self – which is not qeated by you, which need not be crcat€d by you, which you already are. You are born with ir Yan are it! It needs to be discovercd- If this is not pos- sible, or if the society &s not d- low it o happen – and no society allows it to happen, because the real self is dangerous: dangerous for tlte established church, danger- ous for the soate, dangerctrs for the crowd, dangerous fu the tradition, because once a man knows his rcal self, he becomes an individual. He belongs no morc to the mob psy- chology; he will not be supersti-

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A B O U T M E D I T A T I O N

tious, and he cannot be exploited, and he cannot be led like cattle, he cannot be ordercd and commanded. He will live according to his lighq he will live ftom his own inward- ness. His life will have temendous beauty, inlegrty. But that is the fear of the society. Integrated persons become individu- als, and the society wants you to be non-individuals. Instead of individu- ality, the society teaches you to be a personality. The word’personality’ has to be understood. It comes from

lhe root, persana – persota means a mask. The society gives you a false idea of who you are; it gives you just a toy, and you go on clinging to tlrc toy your whole life. le

A r I see it, almost everybody is /4, in the wrong place. The per- son who would have been a tremen- dously happy doctor is a painter and the person who would have been a uemendously happy painter is a docor Nobody seems to be in his right place; that’s why this

whole society is in srch a mess. The person is dfuected by ottnrs; he is not directed by his own inurition. Meditation helps you to grow your own innritive faculty. It becomes very clear what is going o fulfill you, what is going to help you flower. And whatsoever it is, it is going o be different for each indi- vidul – that is the meaning of the word ‘individual’: everybody is unique. And to seek and search for you uniqueness is a great thrill, a grcat advennr€. 20

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The Science of Meditation

 

 

T H E S C I E N C E O F M E D I T A T I O N

ith a master, with scien- tific techniques, you can save much time,

opportunity and energy. And sometimes within seconds you can gow so much that even wilhin lives you would not have been able to gfow that much. If a right tech- nique is used, growth explodes. And these techniques have been used in thousands of years of ex- perimens. They were not devised by one man; they were devised by many, many seekers, and only the essence is given here.

Vou will rcach the goal, be- I cause the life energy within

you will move unless it comes to the point where no movement is possible; it will go on moving to the highest peak. And that is the rcason why one goes on being born again and again. I-eft to your- self you will reach, but you will have to Eavel very, very long, and the joumey will be very tedious and boring. t

All techniques can be helpful but they ale not exactly mediradon, they are just a groping in the dark. Suddenly one day, doir’g some- ttring, you will become a witness. Doing a meditation like Dynamic, or Kundalini or Whirling. Suddenly one day the meditation will go on but you will not be identified. You will sit silently behind, you will watch it – that day meditration has happened; that day the technique is

no more a hindrance, no morc a help. You can enjoy it if you like, like an exercise; it gives a certain vitality, but there is no need now – the real meditation has happened. Meditation is witnessing. To medi- tate means to become a witness. Meditation is not a technique at all! This will be very confusing to you because I go on giving you tech- niques. In the ulcimate sense medi- tation is not a technique; medita-

Methods and Meditation

Techniques are helpful

Techniques are helpful because they are scientific. You are savedfrom unnecessary wandering, unnecessary groping; tf you don’t know any techniques,youwill take a long time.

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tion is an understanding, awarcness. But you need techniques because that final undentanding is very far away from you; hidden deep in you but still very far away flom you. Right this moment you can attain it. But you will not attain it, because your mind goes on. This very me ment it is possible and yet impossi- ble. Techniques will bridge the gap; they are just to bridge the gap. So in the beginning techniques are mediuations; in the end you will laugh – techniques are not medita- tion. Meditation is a totally differ- ent quality of being, it has nothing to do with anything. But it will happen only in the end; dont tlink it has happened in the beginning, otherwise the gap will not be bridged. z

Begin with effort

l\ feditation techniques are do- lYlings, because you are ad- vised to do something – even to meditate is o do something; even to sit silently is to do something, even to nat do anything is a sort of doing. So in a superficial way, all mediration techniques are doings. But in a deeper way they arc not, because if you succeed in them, the doing disappean. Only in the beginning it appears

like an effort. If you succeed in it, the effort disappears and the whole thing becomes spontaneous and ef- fortless. If you succeed in it” it is not a doing. Then no effort on your part is needed: it becomes just like breathing, it is there. But in the be- ginning there is bound o be effort” because the mind cannot do any- thing which is not an effort. If you tell it to be effortless, the whole thing seems absurd. ln Zen, where much emphasis is put on effortlessness, the masters say tio lhe disciples, ‘Just sit. Dont do anything.” And fte disciple tries. Of course – what can you do other than urying? In the beginning, effort will be there, doing will be there – but only in the beginning, as a necessary evil. You have to remember con- stantly that you have to go beyond it. A moment must come when you arc not doing anything about medi- tation; just being there and it hap- pens. Just sitting or standing and it happens. Not doing anything, just being aware, il happens. All these techniques are just to help you to come to an effortless mo- ment. The inner transformation, tlp inner realization, cannot happen through effort, because effort is a sort of tension. With effort you can- not be rclaxed totally; the effont will become a banier. With tlris back-

gpund in mind, if you make effort, by and by you will become capable of leaving it also. s

These methods are simple

E u.tt of these metlrods which .Ltwe will be discussing has been told by someone who has achieved. Remember this. They will lmk too simple, and ttrey are. To our minds, things which are so simple cannot be appealing. Be- cause if techniques are so simple and the abode is so near, if you are already in it, and the home is so near, you will look ridiculous to yourself – then why are you miss- ing it? Rather than feel the ridicu- lousness of your own ego, you will think that such simple methods cannot help. That is a deception. Your mind will tell you that these simple methods cannot be of any help – that they are so simple, ttrcy cannot achieve anything. ‘”To achieve Divine exis- tence, to achieve the Absolute and ttrc Llltimate, how can such simple methods be used? How can they be of any help?” Your ego will say that they cannot be of any help. Remember one thing – ego is al- ways interested in something which is difficult because when something

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T H E S C I E N C E O F M E D I T A T I O N

is ffiicult, there is a challenge. If you can overcome tlrc diffrculty, your ego will feel fulfilled. The ego is never attracted oward anything which is simple – never! If you want to give your ego a challenga then you have !o have something difficult devised. If something is simple, there is no appeal, because even if you can conquer it, there will be no fulfillment of ttre ego. ln the fint place, there was nothing to be conquercd: the thing was so sim- ple. Ego asls for difficulties – some hurdles to be crosse( some peaks to be conquered. And the morc diffi- cult the pealq ttre more at ease your ego will feel. Because these techniques arc so simple, they will not have any ap- peal o your mind. Remember, that which appeals to the ego cannot help your spiritual gowth. These techniques arc so simple that you can achieve all that is possible to human consciousness at any moment that you decide to achieve i L 4

First understand the technique

choking to death; a billiard ball was stuck in his tlroat, and the assistant was at a loss for what to do. So he asked the old docor, “What am I supposed to do now?” The old doc- tor said, ‘”Trckle the patient with a feather.” After a few minutes the assistant phoned again, very hap’py and jubi- lant, and said, “Your treaunent proved wonderful! The patient startetl laughing and he spat the ball out. But tell me – from where have you learned this remarkable tech- nique?” The old doctor said, “I just made it up. This has always been my motto: when you dont know what to do, do something.” But this will not do as far as medi- tation is concemed. If you dont know what to do, dont do any- thing. Mind is very intricate, com- plex, delicate. If you dont know what to do, it is better not to do anything, because whatsoever you do without knowing is going to cre- at€ more complexities than it can solve. It may even p’rove fatal, it may even prove suicidal. If you dont know anything about the mind…. And rcally, you dont know anything about it. Mind is just a word. You donl lnow tlte complexity of it Mind is the most complex thing in existence; there is nothing comparable to it And it is

the most delicate; you can desmy it, you carr do something which then can not be undone. These techniques are based on a very deep knowledge, on a very deep encounter with tlp human mind. Each technique is based on long experimentation. So remember this: dont do any- thing on yotlr own, and dont mix two techniques, b@ause their func- tioning is different, their ways are different” their bases are different. They lead to the same end, but as means they are totally differenr Sometimes they may even be dia- merically opposite. So dont mix two techniques. Really, dont mix anything; use the technique as it is grven. Don’t change it, dont improve it – because you cannot improve it, and any change you bring to it will be falal. And before you start doing a tech- nique, be fully alert that you have understood it. If you feel confused and you dont really know what the technique is, it is be0er not t0 do it, because each technique is for bringing about a revolution in you. First ry to undentand tlp tech- nique absolutely rightly. When you have understood it, then try it And dont use this old doctor’s motto that when you dont know what o

Jhave heard a story about an old Idoctor. One dav his assistant phoned him because he was in very geat diffrculty: his patient was

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T H E S C I E N C E O F M E D I T A T I O N

dci, do something. No, donl do any- thing. Nondoing will be more ben- eficial. s

The right method will click

J) eallf, when you try the right l\method it clicks immediately. So I will go on talking about meth- ods here every day. You try tlrcm. Just play with them: go home and try. The right method, whenever you happen upon it, just clicks. Something explodes in you, and you know that “This is the right method for me.” But effort is need- ed, and you may be surprised that suddenly one day one method has gnpped you. I have found that while you are playing, your mind is morc open. While you are serious your mind is not so open; it is closed. So just play. Do not be too serious, just play. And these methods are simple. You can just play with them. Thke one method: play with it for at least three days. If it gives you a certain feeling of affinity, if it gives you a certain feeting of well-being, if it gives you a certain feeling tlnt this is for you, tlwn be serious about it. Then forget the others. Do not play with other methods; stick to it – at least for three months.

Miracles are possible. The only thing is that the technique must be for you. If the technique is not for you, then nothing happens. Then you may go on with it for lives to- gether, but nothing will happen. If the method is for you, then even three minutes are enough. e

When to drop the method

I ll the geat masters say this, .{-l,that one day you have to drop the method. And the sooner you drop it, the better. The moment you attain, the moment awareness is re- leased in you, immediately drop the method. Buddha used to tell a story again and again. Five idiots passed through a village. Seeing them, people were surprised, because they were carrying a boat on their heads. The boat was rcally big; they were almost dying under the weight of it. And people asked, “What arc you doing?” They said, “We cannot leave this boat. This is the boat that helped us t0 come from the other shore to this shore. How can we leave it? It is because of it that we have been able t0 come here. Without it we would have died on the other shore. The night was coming close, and there

were wild animals on the other shore; it w.ls ils sure as anything that by the moming we would have been dead. We will never leave this boat. We arc indebted forever. We will carry it on our heads in sheer gratitude.” Methods are dangerous only if you are unaware; otherwise they can be used beautifully. Do you think a boat is dangerous? It is dangerous if you are thinking to carry it on your head for your whole life, out of sheer gratitude. Otherwise it is just a raft to be used and discarded, used and abandoned, used and nev- er looked back at again; there is no need, no point! If you drop the remedy, automati- cally you will start senling in your being. The mind clings; it never al- lows you to setde in your being. It keeps you interested in something that you arc nou the boats. When you dont ctng to anything, there is nowhere to go; all boats have been abandoned, you cannot. go anywhere; all paths have been &opped, you qmnot go anywhere; all dreams and desires have disap- pearcd, there is no way t0 move. Relaxation happens of its own ac- cord. Just think of the word relax.B,e… settle…you have come home. One moment all is fragrance, and the next moment you are searching

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for it anO you cannot find it, where it has gone. Only glimpses will happen in the begmning. Slowly slowly, they be- come morc and more solid, they abide more and more. Slowly, slow- ly, slowly, slowly, very slowly, they settle forever. Before that, you can- not be allowed to take it for grant- ed; that will be a mistake. When you are sitting in meditation, a session of medilation, this will happen. But it will go. So what are you supposed to do between ses- sions? Between sessions, continue to use the method. Drop the method when you are deep in meditation. The moment comes, as awareness is getting purer and purer, when sud- denly it is utterly pue: dmp the method, abandon the method, for- get all abut the remedy, just settle and be. But this will happen only for mo- ments in the beginning. Sometimes it happens here listening to me. Just for a moment, like a brenze, you are transported inlo another world, the world of no-mind. Jus[ for a mo- ment, you know that you know, but only for a momenl And again the darkness gathen and he mind is back with all its dreams, with all its desires and all is stupidities. For a moment the clouds had sepa- rated and vou had seen the sun.

Now the clouds are therc again; it is dl dark and the sun has disap- pearcd. Now even to believe that the sun exiss will be difficult. Now to believe that what you had experi- enced a moment before was true will be difficulr It may have been a fantasy. The mind may say it might have been just imagination. It is so incredible, it lmks so im- possible that it could have hap- pened to yor. With all this stupidity in the mind, with all these clouds and darknesses, it happened to you: you saw the sun for a moment. It doesnt look prcbable, you must have imagined it; maybe you had fallen into a dream and seen it. Between sesions start again, be in the boat, use the boat again. r

Imagination can work for you ‘pit.t

you must understand what I imagination is. It is condemned very much nowadays. The moment you hear the word “imagine” you will say this is useless, we want something real, not imaginary. But imagination is a rcality, it is a ca- pacity, it is a potentiality within you. You can imagine. That shows that your being is capable of imagi- nation. This capacity is a rcality. Through this imagination you can

destroy or you can create yoursell that depends on you. Imagination is very powerful. It is potential power. What is imagination? It is getting into an atdnrde so deeply that the very attitude becomes reality. For example, you may have heard about a technique which is used in Tibet. They call it heat yoga. The night is cold, snow is falling, and the Trbetan lama is standing naked under the open sky. The tempera- ture is below zero. You would sim- ply start dying, you would frreeze. But the lama is practicing a particu- lar technique – he is imagining that his body is a buming fire and he is imagining that he is perspiring – the heat is so much that he is per- spiring. And he actually starts per- spiring although the temperature is below zero and even tlrc blood should freeze. He starts perspiring. What is happening? This perspira- tion is real, his body is rcally hot – but this rcality is created through imagination. Once you get in tune with your imagination, the body starts func- tioning. You arc alrcady doing many things without knowing that it is your imagination working. Many times you create illnesses just tlrough imagination; you imagine that now this disease is here, infec- tious, it is all over the place. You have become receptive, now therc

 

 

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is every possibility that you will fall ill – and that illness is real. But it has been created through imagina- tion. Imagination is a force, an ener- gy, and the mind moves through it. And when the mind moves through it” the body follows. e

fhis is the difference between I the tantra tradition and West-

ern hypnosis: hypnotists think that by imagination you are creating something; tantra thinks that you are not creating it – by imagina- tion you are simply becoming at-

tuned o something that is alrcady there. Whatsoe,ver you create by imagination cannot be permanent Ifit is not a reality, then it is false, unreal, and you are creating a hal- lucination. r

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Enough space

f T /hen you are trying to \ru meditate, put dre phone Y V off the hook, disengage

yourself. Put a notice on the door that for one hour nobody should lnock, that you are meditating. And when you move ino the med- itation room, take your shoes off, because you are walking on sacred ground. Not only trke your shoes off, but everything that you are preoccupied with. Consciously, leave everything with the shoes. Go inside unoccupied. One can take one hour out of nwenty-four hours. Give twenty- three houn for your occupations, desires, thoughs, ambitions, pro- jections. Take one hour out of all this, and in the end you will hnd ttat only that one hour has been the rcal hour of your life; those twenty-tfuee hours have been a sheer wastage. Only that one hour has been saved and all else has gone down the drain. to

Suggestions for Beginners

The right place

Vou should find a place which

I enhances meditation. For ex- ample, sitting under a ree will help. Rather than going and sitting in font of a movie house or going o the railway station and sitting on the platform, go to nature, to the mountains, to the rees, to the riven where tao is still flowing, vibrating, pulsating, sueaming all around. Trees are in constant meditation. Silent, unconscious, is that medita- tion. I’m not saying to become a tree; you have to become a buddha! But Buddha has one thing in com- mon with the tree: he’s as green as a

tree, as full ofjuice as a tree, as cel- ebrating as a tree – of course with a differcnce. He is conscious, tie ree is unconscious. The uee is uncon- sciously in tao; a buddha is con- sciously in no. And that is a great difference, the difference between the earth and the sky. But if you sit by the side of a tree surrounded by beautiful birds singing, or a peacock dancing, or just a river flowing, and the sound of running water, or by the side of a waterfall, and the great music of i r . . . . Find a place where nahre has not

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yet be€n disturbed, polluted. If you cannot find such a place, then just close your doors and sit in your own room. If it is possible have a special room for meditation in your house. Just a small comer will do. but especially for mediarion. Why especially for meditation? – be- cause every kind of act creates its own vibration. If you simply medi- tate in that place, that place be- comes meditative. Every day you meditate it absorbs your vibration when you are in meditation. Next day when you come, those vibra- tions start falling back on you. They help, they reciprocate, they respond. When a person has rcally become a meditaor, he can meditate sitting before a picture house, he can medi- tate on the railway platform. For fifteen years I was continuously traveling around the coun!ry, con- tinuously naveling – day in, day out, day in, day out, year in, year out – always on a train, on a plane, in a car. That makes no difference. Once you have become rcally root- ed in your being, nothing makes a difference. But tttis is not for the beginner. When the uee has become rooted, let winds come and let rains come and let clouds thunder; it is all good. It gives integrity to the ree. But when the ree is small, tendel then even a small child is dangerous

enough, or just a cow passing by, tlat is enough to destroy it. tt

Be comfortable

I posture should be such that l1’you can lorget your body. What is comfort? When you forget your body, you arc comfortable. When you are reminded continu- ously of the body, you are uncom- foruble. So whether you sit in a chair or you sit on the ground, that is not the point. Be comfortable, be- cause if you are not comfortable in the body you cannot long for other blessings which belong to deeper layers: the hrst layer missed, all other layers closed. If you rcally want to be happy, blissful, then start from the very beginning to be bliss- ful. Comfort of the body is a basic need for anybody who is trying to reach inner ecslasies. 12

Begin with catharsis

Jnever tell people to begin with Ijust siaing. Begin from where beginning is easy. Otherwise, you will begin !o feel many things un- necessarily – things that are not there. If you begin with sitting, you will feel much disturbance inside. The

more you try !o just sit, the more disturbance will be felt. You will become aware only of your insane mind and nothing else. It will crc- at€ deprcssion; you will feel frus- trated, you will not feel blissful. Rather, you will begin to feel that you arc insane. And sometimes you may really go insane! If you make a sincere effort to

‘just

sit’, you may really go insane. Only because people do not teally try sincerely does insaniry not happen more often. With a sitting posture you begin to lnow so much mad- ness inside you that if you are sin- cere and continue it, you may really go insane. It has happened before, so many times. So I never suggest anything that can create frustration, depresion, sadness. ..anything that will allow you to be too aware of your insanity. You may not be ready to be aware of all the insanity that is inside you. You must be allowed to get to know certain things gradually. Knowledge is not always good. It must unfold iself slowly, :ls your capacity to absorb it grows. I begin with your insanity, not with a sitting posture. I allow your in- sanity. If you dance madly, the op- posite happens within you. With a mad dance, you begin to be aware of a silent point within you; with sitting silently, you begin to be

 

 

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aware of madness. The opposite is always the point of awareness. With you dancing madly, chaotical- ly, with rying, with chaotic brcath- ing, I allow your madness. Then you begin to be aware of a subtle point, a deep point inside you which is silent and still, in contrast to the madness on the periphery. You will feel very blissful; at your center therc is an inner silence. But if you are just sitting, then tlre inner one is the mad one. You are silent on the outside, but inside you are mad. If you begin with something active – something positive, alive, moving – it wi[ be better. Then you will be- gin to feel an inner stillness grow- ing. The more it grows, the more it will be possible for you to use a sit- ting postwe or a lying postue – the more silent meditation will be pos- sible. But by then things will be dif- fercnt, totally differcnt” A meditation technique that begins with movement, action, helps you in other ways also. It becomes a catharsis. When you are just sitting, you arc frusuated: your mind wants to move and you are just sitting. Ev- ery muscle turns, every nerve nrms. You are trying to force something upon yourself that is not natural for you. Then you have divided yourself into the one who is forcing and the one who is being forced. And really, ttre part that is being forced and sup-

pressed is the more authentic part. It is a more major part of your mind than the part that is suppressing, and the major part is bound to win. That which you are suppressing is really to be thrown, not suppressed. It has become an arcumulation within you because you have been constantly suppressing it. The whole upbringing, the civilization, the edu- cation, is suppressive. You have been suppressing much that could have been thrown very easily with a different education, with a more conscious education, with a more aware parenthood. wittr a bener awareness of the irurer mechanism of the mind, the culture could have allowed you to throw many things. For example, when a child is angry we tell him, “Do not be angry.” He begins to supprcss anger By and by, what was a momentary happen- ing becomes permanent. Now he will not act utry, but he will re- main angry. We have accumulated so much anger from what were just momentary things. No one can be angry continuously unless anger has been suppressed. Anger is a momentary tldng that comes and goes; if it is expressed, then you are no longer angry. So with me, I would allow the child o be angry more authentically. Be angry, but be deep in it. Do not supprress iL Of course, there will be p’roblems.

If we say, “Be angry,” then you are going to be angry ct someone. But a child can be molded. He can be given a pillow and !old, “Be angry with the pillow Be violent wittr the pillow.” From the very beginning, a child can be brought up in a way in which the anger is just deviated. Some object can be given to him: he can go on throwing the object until his anger goes. Within min- utes, within seconds, he will have dissipated his anger and therc will be no accumulation of il You have accumulated ange! sex, violence, greed – everyhing. Now this accumulation is a madness within you. It is therc, inside you. if you begin with any suppressive meditation (for example, with just sitting) you are sup’pressing all of this, you arc not allowing it to be rcleased. So I begin with a cathar- sis. First, let the suppressions be thrown into the air. And when you can throw your anger into the aiq you have become maturc. If I cannot be loving alone, if I can be loving only with someone I love, then I am not rcally manle yeL Then I am depending on some- one even to be loving. Someone must be there; only then can I be loving. That loving can be only a very superfrcial thing. It is not my natwe. If I am alone in the room I am not loving at all, so the loving

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quality tias not gone deep; it has not become a part of my being. You become more and more mature when you are les and less depen- dent- If you can be angry alone, you are more mature. You do not need any object to be angry. So I make a catharsis in the beginning a musl You must throw everything into the sky, into the open space, without being conscious ofany object. Be angry without the penon with whom you would like o be angry. Weep without finding any cause. taugh, just laugh, without anything to laugh aL Then you can just throw the whole accumulated thing. You can just throw it! And once you know the way, you are unburdened of the whole past Wthin moments you can be unbur- dened of the whole life – of lives even. If you are ready o throw ev- crylhing, if you can allow your madness to come out, within mo- ments there is a deep cleansing. Now you are cleansed: fresh, inno- cent. You are a child again. Now, in y’our innocence, sitting meditation can be done – just sitting or just ly- ing or anything – because now drere is no mad one inside to dis- rurb the sitting. Cleansing must be the fint thing – a catharsis. O{herwise, with brcathing exercises, with just sitting, with practicing asanas, yogic postures –

T I I E S C I E N C E O F M E D I T A T I O N

you are just sup’pressing something. And a very strange thing happens: when you have allowed everything o be thrown out, sining will just happen, asanas will just happen. It will be spontaneous. Begrn with catharsis and then something good can flower within you. It will have a different quality, a different beauty – altogether dif- ferent. It will be autlentic. When silence comes to you, when it descends on you, it is not a false thing. You have not been cultivat- ing it. It comes t0 you; it happens to you. You begin to feel it glowing inside you just like a mother begrns to feel a child gmwing. tr

\f, /nen I used to lead medita- V V tion camps myself, there

was one method where every af- ternoon all the participants in the camp used to sit together and ev- erybody was allowed to do what- soever he wanted – no restriction, just he was not to interfere in any- body else’s work. Whatever he wants to say, he can say; if he wants to cry, he can cry; if he wants to laugh, he can laugh – and one thousand people! It. was such a hilarious scene! People you could never have imagined – seri- ous people – doing such stupid things! Somebody was making faces, putting out his tongue as far

as he can, and you know that this man is a police commissioner! One man I cannot forget, because he used to sit in ftont of me every day. He was a very rich man frrom Ahmedabad, and because his whole business w:ls the share mar- ket, he was just contin,’ally on the phone. Whenever this one hour meditation would begin, within wo or three minutes he would take up the phone. He would start dialing the numbers: “Hello!” And he would say – it looked from his face as if he was gening the answer – “Purchase it.” This would continue for one hou4 and he was again and again phon- ing to this place, to that place, and once in a while he would look at me and smile: “What nonsense I’m doing!” But I had to keep absolute- ly serious. I never smiled at him. So he would again start phoning: “No- body is taking any nodce, every- body is engaged in his own work.” One thousand people doing so many things … and these tlings were continuously going on in their minds. This was a geat chance for them to bring them oul It was such a drama. Jayantibhai used to be in charge of the camp in Mount Abu, and one of his closest friends took off all his clothes. That was a surprise! Jayan- tibhai was standing by my side, and

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he could not believe it. That man was a very serious man, very rich; what was he doing in fi,ont of onc thousand people? And tlren he smn- ed pushing the car in which I had come !o the place – it was Jayantib- hai’s car. We were in the mountains, and just ahead therc was a thou- sand-foot drop, and he was naked pushing the car. Jayantibhai asked me, “What has to be done? He is going to destroy the catr, and I had never thought that this man was against my car We are close friends.” So I told him, “You push it from the other side; otherwise he is go- i n g t o . . . . ” So he was stopping the car and his friend was jumping around and shouting, “Get out of my way! I have always hated this car” – be- cause he did not have an imported ca4 and this was an imported car which Jayantibhai was keeping for me. I was coming m Mount Abu three or four times a year, so he was keeping that carjust for me. His friend must have been feeling jealous inside that he did not have an imported car And then a few people seeing the situation rushed to help. When he saw tlnt so many people were preventing him, just out of gotest he climbed a tree in front of me. Naked he sat in the top of the tree, and he started shaking

he ree. There was every danger that he would fall witlr the Eee on top of the thousand people. Jayan- tibhai asked me, “What has to be done now?” I said, “He is your friend. Let him be, dont be worried. Just move the people to this sidc and that, and let him do whatsoever he is doing. Now he is not destroying the car. At the most he will have multiple frac- tures.” As people moved away, he also stopped. Silently he sat in the tree. After the meditation was over, he was still sitting in the uee, and Jayantibhai said, “Now get down. The meditation is over.” As if he woke up from a sleep, he looked all around and saw that he was naked! He jumped out of the ree, rushed to his clothes, and said, “What happened to me?” In the night he came !o see me and he said, “This was a very dangerous meditation! I could have killed my- self or somebody else. I could have desroyed the car, and I am a great friend of Jayantibhai, and I had never thought…but certainly there must have been this idea in me. “I hated tlp idea that you come in his car always, and I hated the idea that he has got an imported car, but it was not at all conscious in me. And what I was doing in the ree? I must have been carrying so much

violence in me, I wanted t0 kill people.” That meditation was immensely helpful. It relaxed people in one hour so much that tiey told me, “It seems a heavy load has disappeared from the head. We were not aware what we were carrying in the mind.” But m become aware of it, there was no other way except an unlimited expression. It was only a small experiment, I told people to continue i[ soon you will come to many more things, and one day you will come to a point where all is exhausted. Remember only not to interfere with anybody, not to be destructive. Say anything you want to say, shout. abuse, what- ever you want – and exhaust all that you have been collecting. But this is a srange world. The govemment of Rajasthan passed a resolution in their assembly that I cannot have camps in Mount Abu, because they had heard all these things were happening there – peo- ple who are perfectly right become almost mad, start doing any kinds of things. Now the politicians in the assembly donl have any idea of the human mind, its inhibitions and how to exhaust tlrem, how to burn them. I had to stop that meditation because otherwise they were not going to allow me to have camps in Mount Abu. ta

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The three essentials

editation has a few es- sential things in it, whatever tfre method.

but those few essentials are n@es- sary in every method. The hrst is a relaxed state: no fight with the mind, no control of the mind, no concentration. Second, just warch with a rclaxed awarcness whatever is going on, without any interfer- ence – just watching the mind, silently, without any judgment, evaluation. These are the three things: relax- ation, warching, no judgment, and slowly, slowly a great silence de- scends over you. All movement within you ceases. You are, but there is no sense of ‘I am’ – just a pure space. Therc are one hundred and twelve methods of meditation. I have talked on all those methods. They differ in tlpir constitution, but the fundamentals remain the same: relaxation, watcMulness, a non-judgmental attitude. ts

Be playful

\ fillions of people miss medi- lYltation because meditation has taken on a wrcng connotation. It looks very serious, looks gloomy, has sometling of the church in iq it looks as if it is only for people who are dead, or almost dead – those who are gloomy, seri- ous, have long faces, who have lost festivity, fun, playfulness, celebration…. These are the qualities of medita- tion: a really mediutive person is playful; life is fun for him, life is a leela, a play. He enjoys it Eemen-

Be patient

J\ ont be in a hurry. So often, l-l hurrying causes delay. As you thinL wait patiently – the deeper the waiting, the sooner it comes. You have sown the seed, now sit in the shade and watch what hap- pens. The seed will break, it wi[ blossom, but you cannot speed the process. Doesnt everything need time? Work you must” but leave the results to God. Nothing in life

Guidelines toFrcedom

dously. He is not serious. He is re- laxed. 16

 

 

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is ever wasted, especially steps taken towards truth. But at times impatience comes; im- patience comes with thirst, but this is an obstacle. Keep tlre ttrirst and throw the impatience. Do not confuse impatience with thirst. With thirst there is yearning but no sfuggle; with impatience there is struggle but no yearning. With longing there is waiting but no demanding; with impatience there is demanding but no waiting. With thirst there are silent tears; with impatience there is rcsdess sruggle. Truth cannot be raided; it is arained thmugh surrendeq not through sruggle. It is conquered through te tal sunender. tr

Don’t look for results

-l-h” ego is result-oriented, the I mind alwavs hankers for re-

sults. The mind is never interested in the act itself, its interest is in the resull “What am I going to gain out of it?” If the mind can manage to gain without going through any action, then it will choose the shortcut. That’s why educated people be- come very cunning, because they are able to find shortcuts. If you earn money through a legal way, it

may take your whole life. But if you can earn money by smuggling, by gambling, or by something else – by becoming a political leader, a prime minister, a president – then you have all the shortcuts available to you. The educated person be- comes cunning. He does not be- come wise, he simply becomes clever. He becomes so cunning that he wants to have everything without doing anything for it. Medilation happens only o those who are not result-oriented. Medita- tion is a non-goal-oriented state. te

Appreciate unawareness

hile aware enjoy awareness, and while unaware enjoy

unawareness. Nothing is wrong, because unawarcness is like a resl Otherwise awareness would be- come a tension. If you are awake twenty-four houls, how many days do you think you can be alive? Without food a man can live for three months; without sleep, within three weeks he will go mad, and he will try to commit suicide. In the day you arc alert; in the night you relax, and that relax- ation helps you in the day to be more alert, fresh again. Energies have passed through a rcst period

so they arc more alive in the morning again. The same will happen in media- tion: for a few moments you are perfectly aware, at the peak and for a few moments you are in the val- ley, resting. Awareness has disap pearcd, you have forgotten. But what is wrong in it? It is simple. Through unawarcness awareness will arise again, fresh, young, and this will go on. If you can enjoy both you become the third, and that is the point to be understood: if you can enjoy both, it means that you are neither – neitier awarcness nor unaware- ness – you are the one who enjoys both. Something of the beyond enters. In facu this is the real wihess. Happines you enjoy, what is wrong with it? When happiness has gone and you have become sad, what is wrong with sadness? Enjoy it Once you become capable of en- joyrng sadness, hen you are nei- ther. And this I tell you: if you enjoy sadness, it has its own beauties. Happiness is a little shallow; sad- ness is very deep, it has a depth to it. A man who has never been sad will be shallow, just on the sur- face. Sadness is like a dark night, very deep. Darkness has a silence to it, and sadness also. I{appiness

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bubbles; ttere is a sound in it. It is like a river in the mountains: sound is created. But in the moun- tains, a river can never be very deep; it is always shallow. When the river comes to the plain it be- comes deep, but the sound stops. It. moves as if not moving. Sadness has a depth. Why create trouble? While happy, be happy, enjoy it. Dont get iden- tified with it. When I say be happy, I mean enjoy it. I€t it be a climate which will move and change. The moming changes into noon, noon changes into evening, and then comes night. Irt happiness be a climate around you. Enjoy it, and then when sadness comes, enjoy that too. I teach you enjoyment whatsoever is the case. Sit silently and enjoy sadness, and suddenly sadness is no longer sadness; it has become a silent peaceful moment, beautiful in itself. Nothing is wrong in it. And then comes the ultimate alchemy, the point where suddenly you realize that you are neither – neither happiness nor sadness. You are the watcher: you watch peaks, you watch valleys; but you are nei- ther. Once this point is attained, you can go on celebrating everything. You celebrate life, you celebrate death. tc

Machines help but don’t create meditation

Q o many machines are being de- t J veloped around the world, prc- tending that they can give you med- itation; you just have to put on ear- phones and relax, and within ten minutes you will reach the state of meditation. This is utter stupidity, but there is a reason why such an idea has come to the minds of technical people. Mind functions on a certain wave- lengl.h when it is awake. When it is dreaming it functions on another wavelength. When it is fast asleep it functions on a different wavelenglh. But none of these arc meditation. For thousands of years we have called meditation turiya, the fourth.” When you go beyond the deepest sleep and still you are aware, that awareness is meditation. It is not an experience; it is you, your very being. But these hi-tech mechanisms can be of tremendous use in the right hands. They can help to create the kind of waves in your mind so that you start feeling relaxed, as if half asleep … ftroughts are disappearing and a moment comes that every- thing becomes silent in you. That is the moment when the waves arc fiose of deep sleep. You will not be

aware of this deep sleep, but after ten minutes, when you are un- plugged from the machine, you will see the effects: you arc calm, quiet, peaceful, no worry, no tension; life seems to be more playful and joy- ous. One feels as if one has had an inner bath. Your whole being is calm and cool. With machines tlings arc very cer- tain, because they don’t depend on any doing of youn. It is just like listening to music: you feel peace- ful, harmonious. Those machines will lead you up o the third state – deep sleep, sleep without dreams. But if you think this is meditation then you arc wong. I will say this is a good experience, and while you are in that moment of deep sleep, if you can also be aware from the very beginning, as the mind starts chang- ing its waves… You have to be mor€ alert, morc awake, more watchf,rl – what is happening? – and you will see that mind is by and by falling asleep. And if you can see the mind falling asleep…tre one who is seeing the mind falling asleep is your being, and that is the purpose of all authentic meditation. These machines cannot create that awareness. That awareness you will have to create, but these machines can certainly create within ten min- utes a possibility that you may not be able to crcate in yean of effort.

 

 

T H E S C I E N C E O F M E D I T A T I O N

So I am not against these hi-tech in- struments, I am all for them. It is just that I want the people who are spreading those machines around the world to know that tlrcy are do- ing gmd work, but it is incomplete. It will be complete only when the person in the deepest silence is also alert, like a small f’lame of aware- ness which goes on burning. Every- thing disappears, all alound is dark- ness, and silence, and peace – but an unwavering flame of awareness. So if the machine is in the right hands and people can be taught that the real thing will come not tfuough the machine, the machine can create the very essential gound in which that flame can grow. But that flame de- pends on you, not on the machine. So I am in favor of those machines on the one hand and on the other hand I am very much against them, because many, many people will think, “This is meditation,” and frey will be deceived. These machines will do immense harm, but they will spread all over the world very soon. And they are simple – lhere is noth- ing much in it; it is only a question of creating certain waves. Musicians can leam from those machines, what waves lhey create in people, and they can slan creating those waves through their insruments. There is no need for the machines, just the musicians can create those waves

for you, and you will start falling asleep! But if you can remain awake even in the deepest sleep, when you see that just one step more and you will become unconscious, you have learned a secr€t. That machine can be used beautifully. And this is true about all the ma- chines of the world: in the right hands they can be used Eemendous- ly for the benefit of mankind. In the wrong hands they can become hin- drances. And unfortunately, there arc so nuu:ly wrong hands…. But it is not meditation, it is simply a change in the radio waves that are continuously moving around you in the air. It can be certainly helpful as an experience; otherwise for many people meditation remains only a word. They think that some time they will mediute. And there re- mains a doubt, whether anybody meditates or not? But in the West the mind is mechan- ical, the approach is mechanical; ev- erything they want to reduce to a machine – and they are capable of it. But there are things which are be- yond the capacity of any machine. Awareness cannot be created by any machine; il is beyond the scope of any hi+ech. But what technology can give you can ceruinly be used. This can be used as a very beautiful jumping gound into meditation. And once vou have tasted aware-

ness, perhaps a few times the ma- chine may be helpful so that it be- comes more and more clear, so your awarcness becomes more and more s€parate from the silence that machine is creating. And ttren you should start doing it without the machine. Once you have leamed to do it without the machine, the ma- chine has helpei you immensely. zo

You are not your experlences

1|,ln” o[ the most fundamental \-,/things to remember – not only by you but by everyone – is that whatever you come across in your innerjourney, you arc not iL You are the one who is wihessing it – it may be nothingness, it may be blissfulness, it may be silence. But one thing has to be remem- bered – however beautiful and however enchanting an experi- ence you come by, you are not iL You are the one who is experienc- ing it, and if you go on and on and on, the ultimate in the journey is the point when there is no experi- ence left – neither silence, nor blissfulness, nor notlringness. Therc is nothing as an object for you but only your subjectivity. The mirror is empty. It is not re- flecting anything.It is you.

26

 

 

T I { E S C I E N C E O F M E D I T A T I O N

Even great travelers of the inner world have got stuck in beautiful experiences, and have become identified with those experiences thinking, “I have found myself.” They have smpped beforc rcaching the final stage where all experi- ences disappear. Enlightenment is not an experience. It is the stat€ where you arc left ab- solutely alone, nothing !o know No object, however beautiful, is pre- sent. Only in that moment does your consciousness, unobstructed by any object, take a turn and move back to the source. It becomes self-realization. It be- comes enlightenment. I must remind you about the word ‘object’. Every object means hin- drance. The very meaning of the word is hindrance, objection. So the object can be outside you, in the material world; the object can be inside you in your psycho- logical world, the objects can be in your heart, feelings, emotions, sen- timents, moods. And the objects can be even in your spiritual world. And they arc so ecstatic that one cannot imagine there can be more. And many mystics of the world have stopped at ecstasy. It is a beautiful spot, a scenic spot, but they have not arrived home yet. When you come to a point when all experiences are absent, there is no

object, then consciousness without obstruction moves in a circle – in existence everything moves in a circle, if not obsructed – it comes from the same source of your being, goes around. Finding no obstacle to it – no experience, no object – it moves backwards. And the subject itself becomes the object- That is what J. Krishnamurti con- tinued to say for his whole life: when the observer becomes fte ob- served, know that you have anived. Before that there are thousands of things in the way. The body gives its own experiences, which have become known as the experiences of the centers of kundalini: seven centers become seven lotus flow- ers. Each is bigger than the other and highec and the fragrance is in- toxicating. The mind gives you great spaces, unlimited, infinite. But remember the fundamental maxim that still the home has not come. Enjoy the joumey and enjoy all the scenes that come on the journey – the trees, the mountains, the flow- ers, the riven, the sun and tle moon and the stars – but dont stop anywhere, unless your very subjec- dviry becomes its own object. When the observer is the observed, when the knower is the lnown, when the seer is the seen, the home has anived.

This home is the real temple we have been searching for, for lives togethet but we always go astray. We become satisfied with beauti- ful experiences. A courageous seeker has to leave all those beautiful experiences be- hind, and go on moving. When all experiences are exhausted and only he himself remains in his aloneness…no ecstasy is bigger than that, no blissfulness is more blissful, no truth is truer. You have entered what I call godliness, you have become a god.

An old man went to his doctor. “I have got toilet prroblems,” he com- plained. “Well, let us see. How is your uri- nation?” “Every morning at seven o’clock, like a baby.” “Good. How about your bowel movement?” “Eight o’clock each moming, like clockwork.” “So, what is the problem?” the doc- tor asked. “I dont wake up until nine.”

You are asleep and it is time to wake up. AII tlese experiences are experi- ences of a sleeping mind. The awakened mind has no experi- ences at all. zt

 

 

T H E S C I E N C E O F M E D I T A T I O N

The observer is not the witness

.fh. observer and the observed I are two aspects of the witness.

When they disappear ino each oth- er, when they melt into each othe4 when they are one, the witness for the fust time arises in its totality. But a question arises to many peG ple. The reason is that they think the witness is the observer. In their mind, the observer and the witness are synonymous. It is fallacious; the observer is not the witness, but only a part of it. And whenever the part thinks itself as tlre whole, error aris- es. The observer means the subjective, and the observed means the objec- tive: the observer means that which is outside the observed, and the ob- server means that which is inside. The inside and the outside can’t be separate; they are togetlpl they can only be logether. When this togeth- erness, or rather oneness, is experi- enced, the witrress arises. You cannot practice’the witness. If you practice the witness, you will be practicing only the obse.rver, and the observer is not the wimess. Then what has to be done? Melting has to be done, merging has o be done. Seeing a rose floweq forget completely that there is an object

seen and a subject as a seel l-et the beauty of the moment, the benedic- tion of the moment, ovenvhelm you botfi, so fte rose and you arc no more sepante, but you become one rhythm, one song, one ecstasy. Loving, experiencing music, look- ing at the sunset, let it happen again and again. The more it hap- pens the better, because it is not an art but a knack. You have to get the hunch of it; once you have got it, you can trigger it anywhere, any moment. When the witness arises, there is nobody who is wimessing and there is nothing to be witnessed. It is a pure mirroq mirroring nothing. Even to say it is a mirror is not righq it would be better o say it is a mirroring. It is more a dynamic pro- cess of melting and merging; it is not a static phenomenon, it is a flow. The rose reaching you, you rcaching ino the rose: it is a sharing of being. Forget that idea tlnt the witness is the observer; it is not. The observer can be practiced, the witness hap- pens. The observer is a kind of con- centration, and the observer keeps you separate. The observer will en- hance, strengthen your ego. The morc you become an observer, the more you will feel like an island – separate, alool distant” Down the ages, the monks all over

the world have been practicing the observer. They may have called it the wimess, but it is not the wit- ness. The wimess is something to- tally differcnt, qualitatively differ- ent. The observer can be practiced, cultivated; you can become a better observer through practicing it. The scientist observes, the mystic witnesses. The whole pmcess of science is that of observation: very keen, acute, sharp observation, so nothing is missed. But the scientist does not come t0 know God. Al- though his observation is very very expert, yet he remains unaware of God. He never comes across God; on fie contrary, he denies ttrrat God is, because the more he observes – and his whole process is that of ob- sewation – the more he bepomes separate fiom existence. The bridges are broken and walls arise; he becomes imprisoned in his own ego. The mystic witnesses. But remem- ber, witnessing is a happening, a byproduct – a byproduct of being tolal in any moment, in any situa- tion, in any experience. Totality is the key: out of totality arises the benediction of wimessing. Forget all about observing; that will give you mor€ accurate information about the observed object” but you will remain absolutely oblivious of your own consciousness. z

 

 

T H E S C I E N C E O F M E D I T A T I O N

Meditation is a knack

l\ rfeditation is such a mystery IVIttaI it can be called a sci- ence, an art a lrnck, wittrout any contradiction. From one point of view it is a sci- ence because there is a clear-cut technique that has to be done. There arc no exceptions to it, it is almost like a scientific law. But fiom a different point of view it can also be said to be an art. Science is an extension of the mind – it is malhematics, it is logi, it is rational. Meditation belongs to the heart, not to the mind – it is not logic, it is closer to love. It is not like other scientific activities, but more like music, poe!ry, painting, darcing; herrce, it can be called an arr But mediation is such a gl€at mys- tery that cdling it ‘science’ and ‘art’ does not exhaust ir It is a knack – either you get il or you dont get ir A knack is not a science, it cannot be taught. A lsnck is not an art. A knack is the most mysteri- ous thing in human understanding. zr

Tn *y childhood I was sent to a Imasteq a master swimmer He was the best swimmer in fte !own. and I have never come acK)ss a man who has been so uemendously in love with water Water was god o

him, he wonhiped it, and the river was his home. Early – at tluee o’clock in the moming – you would find him on the river. In the evening you would frnd him on the river and at night you would hnd him sit- ting, meditating by the side of the river. His whole life consisted of being close to the river. When I was brought to him – I wanted to learn swimming – he looked at me, he felt something. He said, “But therc is no way to leam swimming; I can just throw you in the waler and then swimming comes of is own accord. There is no way to leam it, it cannot be taught. It is a knack, notknowledge.” And ttnt’s what he did -he threw me in the water and he was standing on the banlc For two, three times I went down and I felt I was almost drown- ing. He was just sunding therc, he would not even try to help me! Of course when yo”u life is at stake, you do whatsoever ytxr can. So I started tlrowing my hands about – they werc haphazard, hectic, bu the lnack came. When life is at stakq you do whatsoever you can do…and whenwer you do whatsoever you can do totally, things happen! I could swim! I was thrilled! “Next time,” I said, “you need not tluow me into it – I will jump myself. Now I know that there is a nanral buoy- ancy of the body. It is not a question

of swimming, it is only a question of getting in nrne with the water ele- ment. Once you are in nrne with the water element it prot@ts you.” And since then I have been throw- ing many people into the river of life! And I just stand there…. Al- most nobdy ever fails f he takes the jump. One is bound to leam. z

J t may take a few days for you to I get the knack. It is a lnack! It is not an art! If meditatiolr were an art” it would have been very simple to teach. Becaue it is a knack, you have to try; slowly you get it. One of the Japanese pofessors of psycholo- gy is trying to teach small children, six months ol4 to swirn, ud he has succeeded. Then he tried with chil- &en three months old – and he has succeeded. Now he is trying wittr the newly bom, and I hope that he succeeds. There is every possibility – because it is a knack. It does not need any other kind of experience: age, education…it is simply a knack. And if a six-month or three- month old baby can swim, that mfiurs we are naturally endowed with the idea of “how” to swim…it is jrst that we have to discover it. Just a little bit of effort and you will be able to discover it. The same is true about meditation – more Eue tlnn about swimming. You jrst have to make a little effot. zs

 

 

T H R E E

The Meditations

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

.l f,editation is an energy

l\/l phenomenon. One very I Y lUasic thing has to be un- derstood about all types of ener- gies, and this is the basic law to be understood: energy moves in a dual polarity. That is tlrc only way it moves; tlpre is no other way for its movemenl It moves in a dual polarify. For any energy to become dyna- mic, the anti-pole is needed. It is just like elecricity moving witlr negative and positive polarities. If there is only negative polarity, electricity will not happen; or if

Dvnamic Meditation: Cathars i s and Celebration

there is only positive polarity, electricity will not happen. Both poles are needed. And when botlr poles meet, they crcate electricity; then tlte spark comes up. And tlis is so for all types of phe- nomena. Life goes on: between man and woman, the polarity. The woman is the negative life-ener- gy; man is the positive pole. They

are electrical – hence so much at- traction. With man alone, life would disappear; with woman alone there could be no life, only death. Benpeen man and woman there exists a balance. Between man and woman – these two poles, these two banla – flows the river of life. Wherever you look you will frnd

the same energy moving in polari- ties, balancing itself. This polarity is very meaningful for meditation because mind is log- ical, and life is dialectical. When I say mind is logical, it means mind moves in a line. When I say life is dialectical, it means life moves with the opposite, not in a line. It zigzags from negative o positive –

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

positive !o negative, negative to positive. It zigzags; it uses the op- posites. Mind moves in a line, a simple straight line. It never moves to lhe opposite – it denies ttre opposite. It believes in one, and life believes in two. So whatsoever mind creates, it al- ways chooses the one. If mind chooses silence – if mind has be- come fed up with all the noise that is created in life and it decides o be silent – then the mind goes to the Himalayas. It wants to be silent, it doesnt want anything to do with any type of noise. Even the song of the birds will disturb ig the breeze blowing through the trees will be a disturbance. The mind wants si- lence; it has chosen the line. Now the opposite has to be denied com- pletely. But this man living in the Hi- malayas – seeking silence, avoiding the other, the opposite – will be- come dead; he will certainly be- come dull. And the more he choos- es to be silent, the duller he will be- come – because life needs the op posite, the challenge of the oppo- site. There is a different type of silence which exists between two opposites. The first is a dead silence, the si- lence of the cemetery. A dead man is silent, but you would not like to

be a dead man. A dead man is ab- solutely silent. Nobody can disturb him, his concentration is perfect. You cannot do anything to distract his mind; his mind is absolutely fixed. Even if the whole world goes mad all around, he will remain in his concentration. But still, you would not like to be a dead man. Silence, concentration, or whatever it is called…you would not like tio be dead – because if you are silent and dead the silence is meaning- less. Silence must happen while you are absolutely alive, vital, bubbling with life and energy. Then silence is meaningful. But then silence will have a different, altogether different quality to it. It will not be dull. It will be alive. It will be a subtle balance between nro polari- ties. A man who is seeking a live bal- ance, a live silence, would like to move to both tie market and the Himalayas. He would like to go lo the martet to enjoy noise, and he would also like o go to the Hi- malayas to enjoy silence. And he will crcate a balance beween these two polar op,posites, and he will re- main in that balance. And that bal- ance cannot be achieved through linear efforts. That is what is meant by the Znn technique of effortless effort It

uses contradictory terms – effort- less effort, or gateless gate, or path- less path. Zen always uses the contradictory term immediately, just to give you the hint that the pmcess is going to be dialectical, not linear. The op- posite is not to be denied but ab- sorbed. The opposite is not to be left aside – it has to be used. Left aside, it will always be a burden on you. Left aside, it will hang with you. Unused, you will miss much. The energy can be converted and used. And then, using it, you will be more vital, more alive. The op posite has to be absorbed, then the prccess becomes dialectical. Effortlessnes means not doing anything, inactivily – aktrma. Ef- fort means doing much, activity – karma. Both have to be therc. Do much, but dont be a doer – then you achieve both. Move in the world, but dont be a part of it. Live in the world, but donl let the world live in you. Then the contradiction has been ab- sorbed…. And that’s what I’m doing. Dynam- ic meditation is a contradiction. Dynamic means effon, much ef- fort, absolute effort. And medita- tion means silence, no effort, no ac- tivity. You can call it a dialectical meditation. t

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

lnstructions for Dynamic Meditation

First stage: 10 minutes

p reathing rapidly in and out LD through the nose, concemrate always on the exhalation. TIE breath should nave deeply iuo tlu lungs, and the chest expands with each inhalation. Be as fast os you can in your breathing, making sure breathing stays deep. Do this as totally as you possibly can; withow tightening up yow body, make sure neck and slnulders stay relaxcd. Contirurc on, wrtil you lit- erally beconw tlw breathing, al- lowing breath to be chaotic (tlwt means not in a steady, predictable way). Once your energy is moving, ilwill begin to move your fudy. Al- low thcse body movenunts to be there, use tlwm to help you build up even mare energy. Moving yottr arms and body in a natural way will lulp your energy to rise. Feel yow energy building up; don’t let go dwing tlw first stage and never slow down.

Second stage: 10 minutes

Follow yow body. Give your body freedom to express wlntever is there … . EXPLODEI … . I*t yow

body take over. Let go of every- tdng that needs to be thrown out. Go totally nud..’ Sing, screarn, laugh, shout, cry, jump, shake, dance, kick, and throw yourself around. Hold nothing back, kcep your wlole body naving. A little acting often helps to get you started. Never allow your mind to interfere with what is lwppening. Remember to be total with your body.

Third stage: 10 minutes

Leaving your slwulders and ncck relaxed, raise both arms as high as you can without locking the elbows. With raised arms, jwnp up and down shouting the mantra HOO !…HOO!.. HOO! as deeply as possible, coming from the bot- tom of your belly. Each time you land on the flats of your feet (making sure heels touch the ground), let the sound hammer deep into the sex center. Give all you hcve, exhaust yourself com- pletely.

Fourth stage: 15 minutes

STOP! Freeze whcre you are in wlatever position you find yow- self. Don’t arrange thc body in any way A cough, a movement, any- thing will dissipate the erwrgy flow

and tlte $ort will be lost. Be a witness to everything that is lwp- pening to you.

Fifth stage: 15 minutes

Celebrate!…with music and dance express whatsoever is there. Carry your aliveness with you through- out the day.z

Giving birth to yourself Helpful hints

y system of Dynamic Medi- tation begins with breathing,

because brcathing has deep mots in ttte being. You may not have ob- served it, but if you can change your heathing, you can change many things. If you observe your brcathing carefully, you will see that when you are angry you have a particular ftythm of breathing. When you are in love, a totally dif- fercnt rhythm comes to you. When you arc Flaxed you breathe differ- ently; when you are tense you heathe differently. You cannot brcatlp the way you do when you arc rclaxed and be angry at the same time. It is impossible. \Vhen you are sexually aroused, your heathing changes. If you do

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

not allow the bleathing to change, your sexual arousal will drop auo- matically. This means ttnt brcath- ing is deeply related to your mental state. If you change your breathing, you can change the srate of your mind. Or, if you change the state of your mind, breathing will change. So I sart with brcathing and I sug- gest ten minutes of chaotic breath- ing in the first stage of the tech- nique. By chaotic brcathing I mean deep, fast” vigorous breathing, with- out any rhythm – just aking the heath in and thr,owing it out, aking it in and ttuowing it out, as vigm- ously, as deeply, as intensely as possible. Thke it in; then tfuow it ouL This chaotic brcathing is to create a chaos within your rep’ressed system. Whalever you arc, you are with a certain type of heathing. A child bleatlres in a particular way. If you are sexually afraid, you heathe in a particular way. You cannot breattre deeply because every deep breath his the sex center. If you are fear- ful, you cannot take deep brcaths. Fear creates shallow breathing. This chaotic breathing is to desuoy all your past patterns. What you have made out of yourself, this chaotic heathing is o desfioy. Chaotic brcathing creates a chaos within you because unless a chaos is created, you cannot rclease your

repressed emotions. And those emotions have now moved ino the body. You are not body and mnd; you arc body/mind, psycho/somatic. You are both togetler. So whatever is done with your body reaches to the mind and whatever is done with the mind reaches to the body. Body and mind are two ends of the same enti- ty. Ten minutes of chaotic brcathing is wonderful! But it must be chaotic. It is not atype of prarcyarna, yogrc breathing. It is simply creating chaos through breathing. And it cre- ates chaos for many rcasons. Deep, fast breathing gives you morc oxygen. The more oxygen in the body, the more alive you become, the more animal-like. Animals are alive and man is halfdead, hatf- alive. You have to be made ino an animal again. Only then can some- thing higher develop in you. If you arc only half-alive, nothing can be done with you. So this chaotic breathing will make you like an animal: alive, vibrating, vi- tal – with more oxygen in your blood, more energy in your cells. Your body cells will become more alive. This oxygenation helps to oeate body elecnicity – or, you can call it bio-energy. When therc is elecricity in the body you can move deep within, beyond yourself.

The electricity will wort within you. The body has its own elecrical sources. If you hammer them with more breathing and more oxygen, ftey begin to flow And if you be- come really alive, then you arc no longer a body. The more alive you b@ome, the more energy flows in your system and the les you will feel yourself physically. You will feel more like energy and less like matter. And whenever it happens 0rat you arc more alive, in those moments you arc not body-oriented. If sex has so much appeal, one of the rea- sons is this: that if you are really in the act, otally moving, totally alive, then you arc no longer a body – just energy. lio feel this en- ergy, to be alive with this energy, is very necessary if you are to move beyond. The second step in my technique of Dynamic Meditation is a cathanis. I tell you to & conscionsly insane. Whatever comes to your mind – whatever – allow it o express it- self; cooperate with it. No rcsis- tance; just a flow of emotions. If you want [o scrcam, tlpn scream. Cooperate with it. A deep scream, a otal scream in which your whole being becomes involved, is very therapeutic, deeply therapeutic. Many things, many diseases, will

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

be released just by the scream. If the scream is total, your whole be- ing will be in iL So for the next ten minutes (this second step is also for ten minutes) allow yourself expression tlrough crying, dancing, screaming, weep- ing, jumping, laughing – ‘freaking

out’ as they say. Within a few days, you will come to feel what it is. In the beginning it may be forced, an effort, or it may even be just act- ing. We have become so false that nothing real or authentic can be done by us. We have not laughed, we have not cried, we have not screamed authentically. Everything is just a facade – a mask. So when you begin to do this technique – in the beginning – it may be forced. It may need efforq there may be just acting. But do not bother about it. Go on. Soon you will touch those sources where you have repressed many things. You will touch those sources, and once they are released, you will feel unburdened. A new life will come to you; a new birth will take place. This unburdening is basic and with- out it there can be no meditation for man as he is. Again, I am not talk- ing about the exceptions. They are irrelevanl With this second step – when things are thrown out – you become va- cant. And this is what is meant bv

emptines: o be empty of all rc- pressions. In this empl.iness some- thing can be done. Transformation can happen; meditation can happen. Then in the third step I use the sound ioo. Many sounds have been used in the past. Each sound has something specific to do. For ex- ample, Hindus have been using the sound cun. This may be famiLiar to you. But I wont suggest aum. Aum strikes at the heart cenrc4 but man is no longer centered in the heart. Aum is sriking at a door wherc no one is home. Sufis have u*A hoo, and if you say hoo loudly, it goes deep o the sex center. So this sound is used just as a hammering within. When you have become empty and vacant, this sound can move within you. The movement of the sound is pos- sible only when you are empty. If you arc filled with repressions, nothing will happen. And some- times it is even dangerous to use any mantra or sound when you are filled with repressions. Each layer of repression will change the pattr of the sound and the ultimate rcsult may be something of which you never dreamed, never expected, never wished. You need a vacant mind; only then can a mantra be used. So I never suggest a mantra to anyone as he is. Fint there must be

a catharsis. This mantra froo should never be done without doing the fnst fwo steps. It should never be done without them. Only in the third step (for ten minutes) is this hoo to be used – used as loudly as possible, bringrng your total energy to it” You arc to harnmer your ener- gy with the sound. And when you are empty – when you have been emptied by the catharsis of the sec- ond step – this hoo goes deep down and his the sex center. The sex center can be hit in two ways. The fint way is nanrally. Whenever you are attracted to a member of 0re op,posite sex, the sex center is hit fiom without. And fnt hit is also a subtle vibration. A man is attracted t0 a woman or a woman is attracted o a man. Why? What is there in a man and what is there in a woman to account for it? A positive or negative electricity hits them, a subtle vibration. It is a sound, really. For example, you may have observed that birds use sound for sex appeal. All their singing is sexual. They are repeat- edly hitting each other with partic- ular sounds. These sounds hit the sex centers of birds of ttre op,posite sex. Subtle vibrations of elecricity are hitting you ftom without. When your sex center is hit ftom without, your energy begins to flow outward

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

– toward *re other. Then there will be reproduction, birth. Someone else will be bom out of you. Hoo is hining the same center of energy, but fiom within. And when the sex center is hit ftom within, the energy starts to flow within. This inner flow of ene4gy changes you completely. You become trans- formed: you give birth to yourself. You are fansformed only when your energy moves in a totally op- posite direction. Right now it is flowing out, but then it begins to flow within. Now it is flowing down, but then it flows upward. This upward flow of energy is what is known a kundalini. You will feel it actually flowing in your spine, and the higher it moves, the higher you will move with it. When this energy reaches the brahnnrandhra – the last center in you: the seventh cenleq located at the top of ttp head – you arc tlre highest man possible. In the third step, I use loo as a ve- hicle to bring your energy upward. These fint three steps are cathartic. They are not meditation, but just preparation for it. They arc a’get- ring ready’ to take the jump, not the jump itself. The fourth step is the jump. In the fourth step I tell you to stopl When I say “Stop!’ stop completely. Dont do anything at all because anything you do can become a di-

version and you will mis the poinr Anything – just a cough or a sn@ze – and you may miss the whole thing because the mind has become diverted. Then the upward flow will stop immediately because your at- tention has moved. Dont do anything. You are not go- ing o die. Even if a sn@ze is com- ing and you do not sneeze for t€n minutes, you will not die. If you feel like coughing, if you feel an ir- ritation in the thmat and you do not do anything, you are not going to die. Just let your body rcmain dead so that the energy can move in one upward flow. When the energy moves upward, you become more and more silent. Silence is the by-poduct of energy moving upward and tension is the by-product of energy moving downward. Now your whole body will become so silent – as if it has disappealed. You will not be able to feel it. You have become bodiless. And when you are silent, the whole existence is silent because the exis- tence is nothing but a minor. It re- flects you. In thousands and thou- sands of minors, it reflects you. When you are silent, the whole ex- istence has become silent. In your silence I will tell you to just be a wihess – a constant alerhes: not doing anything, but just remain- ing a witness, just remaining with

yourself; not doing anything – no movement, no desire, no becoming – but just remaining then and there, silently wirresing what is happen- ing. That remaining in the center, in yourself, is posible because of the first three steps. Unless these three arc done, you cannot remain with yourself. You can go on talking about it, thinking about it” dream- ing about it, but it will not happen because you are not ready. These f,rst three steps will make you ready to remain with the mo ment. They will make you awarc. That is meditation. In that medita- tion something happens ttnt is be- yond words. And once it happens you will never be the same again; it is impossible. It is a growth; it is not simply an experience. It is a Sowth. s

Remember. remain a ufrtness

f his is a meditation in which I you have to be continuously

alert, conscious, aware, whatsoever you do. Remain a witness. Dont get lost. It is easy to get lost. While you are breathing you can forget. You can become one with the brcathing so much that you can forget the wit-

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

ness. But then you miss the point. Breathe as fast, as deeP as Possi- ble, bring your total energy to it, but still remain a witness. Observe what is happening, as if you are just a spectatol as if the

whole ttring is happening to some- body else, as if the whole thing is happening in the body and the consciousness is just centered and looking. This witnessing has to be carried

in all the three steps. And when everything stops, and in the fourth step you have become completely inactive, frozen, then this alertness will come to its p e a k . 4

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

TIvo Powerful Methods for Awakening

f hese arc not really meditations. You are just getting

I in tune. It is like…ifyou have seen Indian classical musicians playing…for half an hour, or sometimes even more, they simply go on lxing their instruments. They will move their knobs, they will make the strings tight or loose, and the drum player will go on checking his drum – whether it is perfect or not. For half an hour they go on doing this. This is not music, this is just preparation. Kundalini is not really meditation. It is just preparation. You are preparing your instrument. When it is ready, then you stand in silence, then meditation starts. Then you are utterly therc. You have woken yourself up by jumping, by dancing, by breathing, by shouting – these are all devices to make you a little more alert. than you ordinarily are. Once you are alert, then the waiting. Waiting is medita- tion. Waiting with full awareness. And then it comes, it descends on you, it zunounds you it plays alound you, it dances around you, it cleanses you, it purifies you, it transforms you.

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

fTl his is ilv much-loved sis-

I rer meditation of Dynarnic t- Meditation. It consists of

four stages of 15 minutes each.

First stage: 15 minutes

Be loose and let your whole body shake,feeling the energies moving up from yow feet. Let go every- where and become the shaking. Your eyes m6y fu opened or closed.

Second stage: 15 minutes

Dance … any way you feel, and let the whole body move as it wishes.

Kundalini Meditation Third stage: 15 minutes

Close your eyes and be still, sitting or standing … witnessing what- ever is happening insidc and ow.

Fourth stage: 15 minutes

Keeping your eyes closed, lie down and be still.

If you are doing the Kundalini Meditation, then allow the shak-

ing, don’t do it” Sand silently, feel it coming and when your body starts a little uembling, help it but dont do ir Enjoy it, feel blissful about it, allow it, receive it, wel- come it, but dont will ir If you force it, it will become an exercise, a bodily physical exercise. Then the shaking will be there but just on the surface, it will not pene- trate you. You will rcmain solid, stone-like, rocklike within; you will remain the manipulator, tln

doeq and the body will just be fol- lowing. The body is not the ques- tion – you are the question. When I say shake I mean your so- lidity, your rock-like being should shake o the very foundations so that it becomes liquid, fluid, melts, flows. And when the mck-like be- ing becomes liquid, your body will follow. Then there is no shake, only shaking. Then nobody is do- ing it, it is simply happening. Then the doer is noL t

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

|fihis is another powerful,

I cathartic technique that t- creates a circle of energy that results in a natural centering. Tlrcre are four stages of 15 min- utes each.

First stage: 15 minutes

With open eyes run on the spot, starting slowly and gradually, get- ting faster and faster. Bring your knees up as high as possible. Breathing dceply and evenly will nnve the energy wilhin. Forget

Mandala Meditation the mind and forget the body. around. This will bring your second hand of a vast clock, but Keepgoing. awakened energies to the navel asfastaspossible. Itisimportant

center. tlnt the mouth remains open and Second stage: 15 minutes fte jaw relaxed, with the breath

Third stage: 15 minutes soft and even. This will bring Sit with your eyes closed and yow centered energies to the mouth open and loose. Gently ro- Lie on your back, open your eyes third eye. tate your body from the waist, like and, with tlu head still, rotate a reed blowing in the wind. Feel them in a clockwise direction. Fourth stage: 15 minutes thewindblowingyoufromside to Sweep them fully around in the side, back and forth, around and sockets os dyou are following the Closeyour eyes andbe still.z

A A ++

1 <

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

Dancing as a Meditation

Disappear in the dance

E otg”t the dancel the center of the ego; become the I

‘ dance. That is the meditation. Dance so deeply that

you forget completely that ‘you’ are dancing and begin to feel that you arc the dance. The division must disap pea4 then it becomes a meditation. If the division is there, then it is an exercise: gmd, healthy, but it cannot be said to be spiritual. It is just a simple dance. Dance is good in iself – as far as it goes, it is good. After it, you will feel fiesh, young. But it is not meditation yet. The dancer must go, until only the dance remains. So what to do? Be rohlly in the dance, because division can exist only if you are not fotal in it. If you are standing aside and looking at your own dance, the division will rcmain: you are the dancer and you are dancing. Then dancing is just an act, something you are doing; it is not your being. So get involved totally, be merged in it” Dont stand aside, dont be an observer. Participate!

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

I.et the dance flow in its own way; dont force ir Rathe! follow it; al- low it o hap’pen. It is not a doing but a happening. Remain in tlp mood of festivity. You are not do- ing something very serious; you are just playing, playrng with your life energy, playing with your bioener- gy, allowing it to move in its own way. Just like the wind blows and the river flows – you are flowing and blowing. Feel ir And be playful. Remember this word’playful’ always – with me, it is very basic. In this coun!ry we call creation M\ leela – God’s play. God has not qeated ttte world it is his play. t

Nataraj Medttatton ataraj is dance as a total meditation. There ore three stages, luting a to-

over completely. Do not control fuwn immediately. Be silent and yow movements or be a witness still. to what is lappening. Jttst be totally in tlw dance.tal of 65 minutes.

First stage: 40 minutes

With eyes closed dance as tf pos- sessed. I*t yow unconscbw take

Secnnd stage: 20 ninutes

Keeping yow eyes closed, lie

Third stage: 5 minutes

Duce in celebrubn and enjoy. t

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

Ct ufr Whirling is one of ttre \most ancient t€chniques, one L-f of the most forceful. It is so de4 that even a single experience can make you lotally different Whirl wittr open eyes, just like small children go on twirling, a5 11 your inner being has become a cen- ter and your whole body has be- come a wheel, moving, a pott€r’s wheel, moving. You are in the cen- teq but the whole body is moving.

Whirling Meditation It is recommended that rc food or dri* fu takenfor three houts be- fore whirling. It is best to have bare feet and wear loose clothing. The meditation is dividcd into two stages, whirling ard resting. There is rc fixed tinu for the whirling – it can go on for hows – bw it is suggested that you contirutc for al least an hour to get fuUy iruo the feeling of the energy whirlpool. The whirling is done on the spot in an anti-clockwise direction, with the right arm held high, palm up- wards, and the left arm low, palm downwards. People who feel dis- con{ort from whirling anti-clock- wise can change to clockwise. kt yonr body be soft and keep yow

eyes open, but unfocused so that images becorne blurred and flow- ing. Remain silent. For the first 15 minutes, rolale slowty. Then gradually build up speed over the nex 30 minutes until the whirling takes over and you be- conrc awhirlpool of energy – the pe- riphery a storm of rnovemeru but the winess at the center silent and stiil. When you are whirling so fast that you cannot remain upright, your body will fall by itself. Don’t make the fall a decision on your Wrt nor attempt to arrange the landing in advance; if your body is soft you will land softly and the earth will absorb your energy. Once you lwve fallen, tlw secord

part of tlu meditation starts. Roll onto your stomach immediately so that your bare navel is in contact with the earth. If anybody feels strong discomfort lying this way, he slnuld lie on his back. Feel your body blending into the earth, like a small child pressed to the motlrcr’s breasts. Keep your eyes closed and remain passive and silentfor at least l5 minutes. After the meditation be as qutet and inacrive as possible. Some people may feel nsusezw dwing the Whirling Meditation, br.tt this feeling should disappear within two or three days. Only discontinue the meditation if it Wrsists.2

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

Anything Can Be a Meditation

f his is the secref de-autonatize. If we can de-autom- L anze our activities. then the whole life becomes a

meditation. Then any small thing, taking a shower, eating your food, talking !o your friend, becomes meditation. Meditation is a quality; it can be bmught ta anything.lt is not a specific act. People think that way, they think meditation is a specific act – when you sit facing o the east, you repeat certain mantras, you burn some incense, you do this and that at a parricular time in a particular way with a particular gesture. Meditation has nothing o do with all those things. They are all ways to autiomatize it and meditation is against automatization. So if you can keep alert, any activity is meditation; any movement will help you immensely. t

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T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

t is nanral and easy to keep alert while you arc in move- ment. When you are just sit-

ting silently, the natural thing is to just fall asleep. When you are ly- ing on your bed il is very difhcult to keep alert because the whole sit- uation helps you !o fall asleep. But in movement naturally you cannot. fall asleep, you function in a more alen way. The only problem is that the movement can become me- chanical. Leam to melt your body, mind and

Running,Jogging, andSwimming soul. Find ways where you can function as a unity. It happens many times to runners. You might not think of running as a meditation, but runners some- times have felt a tremendous expe- rience of meditation. And they were surprised, because they were not looking for it- who thinks that a runner is going to experience

God? But it has happened. And now, more and more, running is be- coming a new kind of meditation. It can happen when running. If you have ever been a runneq, if you have enjoyed running in tle early moming when lhe air is ftesh and young and the whole world is coming back from sleep, awakening – you were running and your body

was functioning beautifully, the fresh ai4, the new world born again out of the dartness of the night, everything singing all around you were feeling so alive … a moment comes when the runner disappean, and there is only running. The body, mind and soul start function- ing togetheq suddenly an inner or- gasm is released.

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

Runners have sometimes come irc- cidentally on the experience of the fourth, twiya, altlnugh they will mis it – 0rey will think it was just because of running that they en- joyed the momenu that it was a beautiful day, the body was healthy and the world was beautiful, and it was just a certain mood. They will not take note of it – but if they do take note of it, my own observation is that a nnner can come close to mediuation more easily *ran any- body else. Jogging can be of immense help, swimming can be of immense help. All the.se things tnve to be trans- formed ino meditations. Drop the old ideas of meditations – that just sining undemeath a tree in a yoga posture is meditation. That is only one of the ways, and it may be suitable for a few people but it is not suitable for all. For a small child il is

not meditation, it is tortue. For a young man who is alive and vibrant it is repression, it is not meditation. Start running in the morning on the road. Start with half a mile and then one mile and come eventually to at le:tst three miles. While run- ning use the whole body; dont run as if you are in a straitjacket” Run like a small child, using the whole body – hands and feet – and run. Breathe deeply and from the belly. Then sit under a E€e, r€st, perspire and let the cool breeze come: feel peaceful. This will help very deeply. Sometimes just stand on the earttr without shoes and feel the coolness, the softness, the warmth. Whatso- ever the earth is rcady to give in that moment, just feel it and let it flow through you. And allow your energy to flow into 0re earth. Be connected with the earth.

If you are connected with the earth, you are connecM wifr life. If you are connected with the earth, you are connected with your body. If you are connected with the earth, you will become very sensi- tive and centered – and that’s what is needed. Never become an expert in run- ning; remain an amateur so that alertness may be kept. If you feel sometimes that running has be- come automatic, drcp it; try swimming. If that hcomes auto- matic, then try dancing. The point to remember is that the movement is just a situation to cEate aware- ness. While it crcates awareness it is good. If it stops crcating awarc- ness, then it is no morc of any use; change to another movement where you will have to be alert again. Never allow any activity o become autornatic. z

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T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

aughter brings some energy fiom your inner source to your surface. Energy starts

flowing, follows laughter like a shadow. Have you watched it? When you really laugh, for those few moments you arc in a deep

Laughing Meditation

meditative state. Thinking stops. It is impossible to laugh and think o- gether. They are diametrically op- posite: either you can laugh or you can think. If you really laugh, thinking stops. If you are still thinking, laughter will be just so- so, lagging behind. It will be a crippled laughter. When you really laugh, suddenly mind disappears. As far as I

lnow, dancing and laughter are the best, natural, easily approachable doors. If you really dance, think- ing stops. You go on and on, you whirl and whirl, and you become a whirlpool – all boundaries, all di- visions are losl You donl even lnow where your body ends and where existence begins. You melt into exislence and existence melts into you; there is an overlapping

of boundaries. And if you are re- ally dancing – not managing it but allowing it to manage you, al- lowing it to possess you – if you are possessed by dance, thinking stops. The same happens with laughter. If you are possessed by laughter, thinking stops. Laughter can be a beautiful inuo- drction to a non-thinking stat€. 3

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

Instructions for Laughing Meditation

The laughing Buddha

puery morning upon waking, f here is a slory, in Japan, of tlre Ltbefore opening yotu eyes, I laughing Buddha, Hotei. His

would start laughing, and then tlp laughter would qpead, and tidal waves of laughter, and the whole village would be overwhelmed with laughter. People used to wait for Hotei to come to their village because he brought such joy, such blessings. He never uttered a single word, never. You asked about Buddha and he would laugh; you asked about enlightenment and he would laugh; you asked about truth and he would laugh. L^augh- t€r was his only message. 5

stretch likz a cat. Stretch every fiber of yow body. After three or four mirwtes, with eyes still closed, be- gin to lutgh. For five mirutes just laugh. At first you will be doing it, but soon the sourd ofyour attempt will cause genairc laughter. Lose yourself in laughter. It may take sev- eral days before it real$ lwppers, for we are sa un(rccustomed to tlu phernmernn. But before long it will be spontaneow and will change the wlnle ruure of yow day. ,

whole teaching was just laughter. He would move ftom one place to another, fiom one markeplace to another marketplace. He would stand in the middle of the market and start laughing – that was his sermon. His laughter was catching, infec- tious; a reallaughter, his whole bel- ly pulsating with the laughter, shak- ing wittr laughter. He would roll on the ground with laughter Feople who would collect together, they

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T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

A man came to me. He had

A Ueen suffering from chain- L \smoking for thirty yean; he was ill and the doctors said, “You will never be healthy if you dont sop smoking.” But he was a chronic smoker; he could not help it He had rried – not thar he had not Fied – he had tried hard, and he had suffered much in trying, but only for one day or two days, and then again the urge would come so remendously, it would simply take him away. Again he would fall into the Mme pattern.

Smoking Meditation Because of this smoking he had lost all self-conf,rdence: he knew he could not do a small rhing; he could not stop smoking. He had become worthless in his own eyes; he thought himself just the most worthless person in the world. He had no rcspect for himself. He came m me. He said, “What can I do? How can I stop smoking?” I said, “No- body can stop smoking. You have

to understand. Smoking is not only a question of your decision now. It has entered into your world of habits; it has taken roots. Thirty years is a long time. It has taken roots in your body, in yow chem- istry; it has spread all over. It is not just a question of your head decid- ing; your head cannot do anything. The head is impotent; it can start things, but it cannot stop them so easily. Once you have started and

once you have practiced so long, you are a g€itt yogl – thlrty years’ practicing smoking! It has become autonomous; you will have to de-automatize it.” He said, “What do you mean by ‘de-

automatization’?” And that’s what meditation is all about, de-automatization. I said, “You do one thing: forget about stopping. Theie is no need either. For thirty years you have

5 5

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

smoked and lived; of course it was a suffering but you have become accustomed to that too. And what does it matter if you die a few houn earlier than you would have died without smoking? What ale you go- ing to do here? What have you done? So what is the point – whether you die Monday or Tues- day or Sunday, this year, that year – what does it matter?” He said, “Yes, lhat is fue, it doesnt matter.” Then I said, “For- get about it; we are not going to sop it at all. Ratheq we are going to understand iL So next time, you make it a medication.” He said, “Meditation out of smok- ing?” I said, “Yes. If Zen people can make a meditation out of drinking tea and can make it a ceremony, why not? Smoking can be as beau- tiful a meditation.” He lmked tirilled. He said, “What arc you sayrng?” He became alive! He said, “Medita- tion? just tell me – I can’t, wait!” I gave him the meditation. I said, “Do one thing. When you are tak- ing the packet of cigarettes out of your pocket, move slowly. Enjoy it, there is no hurry. Be conscious,

alert, aware; take it out slowly with full awarcness. Then take tlre cigarette out of the packet with full awareness, slowly – not in the old hunied way, the unconscious way, mechanical way. Then start tap- ping the cigarene on your packet – but very alertly. Listen to the sound, just as Zen people do when the samovar stars singing and the tea stans boiling … and the aroma. Then smell the cigarette and the beauty of it. . ..” He said, “What ale you saying? The beauty?” “Yes, it is beautiful. Tobacco is as divine as anything. Smell iq it is God’s srnell.” He looked a little surprised. He said, “What! fue you joking?” No, I am not joking. Even when I joke, I dontjoke. I am very serious. “Then put it in your mouth, with full awar€ness, light it with full aware- ness. Enjoy every act, every small act, and divide it into as many acts as possible, so you can become morc and morc awarc. ‘”Then have the hrst puff: God in the form of smoke. Hindus say, ‘Annam Brahm’ – ‘Food is God’. Why not smoke? AII is God. Fill your lungs deeply – this is a

pranayam.I am giving you the new yoga for the new age! Then release the smoke, relax, another puff – and go very slowly. “If you can do it, you will be sur- prised; soon you will see the whole stupidity of ir Not because others have said that it is stupid, not be- cause others have said tlnt it is bad. You will see it. And the seeing will not just be intellectual. It will be from your total being; it will be a vision of your totality. And then one day, if it drops, it drops; if it continues, it continues. You need not worry about iL” After tluee months he cane and he said, “But it dropped.” “Now,” I said, “0ry it on other things too.” This is the secret, tie secrec de-au- lomatize.

Walking, walk slowly, watchfully. looking, look watcffully, and you will see trees are grcener than they have ever been and roses are rosier than they have ever been. Listen! Somebody is talking, gossiping: listen, listen attentively. When you are talking, talk attentively. lrt your whole waking activity be- come de-automatized. o

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T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

Breath – a Bridge to Meditation

f f you can do something with the breath, you will sud-

Idenly tum to the present If you can do something with breath, you will attain to the source of life. If you can do something with heath, you can transcend time and space. If you can do some- thing with breath, you will be in the world and also be- yond it t

:

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

ipassana is the meditation that has made more peo- ple in the world enlight-

ened than any other, because it is the very essence. All other medita- tions have the same essence, but in different forms; something non-es- sential is also joined with them. But vipassana is pure essence. You cannot drop anything out of it and you cannot add anything to im- prove it Vipassana is such a simple thing that even a small child can do ir In fact, the smallest child can do it better tlran you, because he is not

Vipassana yet filled with ttr€ garbage of tln mind; he is still clean and inno- cenL Vipassana can be done in three ways – you can chmse which one zuis you thebest The fint is: awareness of your ac- tions, your body, your mind, your hean” Walking, you should walk with awarcness. Moving hand, you should move

your with

awaleness, tnowing perfectly that you arc moving the hand. You can move it without any conscioumess, like a mechanical thing…you arc on a morning walk; you can go on walking without being aware of your feet Be alert of the movements of your body. While eating, be alert to the movements that are needed for eat- ing. Taking a showet be alert o the

coolness that is coming to you, the water falling on you and the remendous joy of it – just be alert. It should not go on happening in an unconscious state. And the same about your mind. Whatever thought passes on the screen of your mind, just be a watcher Whatever emotion passes on tie screen of your heart” just rc- main a witness – dont get in-

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

vol{ed, dont get identified, dont evaluate what is good, what is bad; that is not part of your meditation. The second form is breathing, be- coming aware of brcathing. As the breath goes in, your belly starts ris- ing up, and as the heath goes out, your belly starts seu.ling down again. So the second method is to be aware of the belly: its rising and falling. Just the very awareness of the belly rising and falling…and the belly is very close to ttre life sources because the child is joined with the mother’s life tlrough the navel. Behind tlp navel is his life’s source. So, when the belly rises up, it is rcally the life energy, the spring of life that is rising up and falling down with each breath. That too is not difficult, and pertnps maybe even easier because it is a single technique. In the first, you have to be aware of the body, you have o be aware of the mind, you have to be aware of your emotions, moods. So it has ttuee steps. The second app’roach has a single step: just the belly, moving up and down. And the re- sult is the same. As you become more awarc of the belly, the mind becomes silent, the heart becomes silent, the moods disappear. And the third is to be aware of the brcath at the entrance, when the breath goes in tfuough your nostrils.

Feel it at tlnt extreme – the otrer polarity ftrom tlre belly – feel it from the nose. The heath going in gives a certain coolness to your nostrils. Then the brcath going out…breath going in, breath going oul That too is possible. It is easier for men than for women. The woman is more aware of the belly. Most of the men dont even breathe as deep as the belly. Their chest rises up and falls down, because a wmng kind of athletics prevails over the world. Certainly it gives a morc beautiful form to the body if your chest is high and your belly is al- most non-existent. Man has chosen o breathe only up to the chest, so the chest becomes bigger and bigger and the belly shrinks down. That appea$ to him to be morc athletic. Around the world, except in Japan, all athletes and teachers of athletes emphasize to breathe by filling yow lungs, expanding your chest, and pulling the belly in. The ideal is the lion whose chest is big and whose belly is very small. So be like a lion; t]rat has become the rule for athletic gymnasts, and the people who have been working with the body. Japan is the only exception where they dont care that the chest should be hoad and the belly should be pulled in. It needs a certain disci- pline to pull the belly in; it is not

natural. Japan has chosen the natu- ral way, hence you will be sur- prised to see a Japanese statue of Buddha. That is the way you can immediately discriminate whether the statue is Indian or Japanese. The Indian statues of Gautam Bud- dha have a very athletic body; the belly is very small and the chest is very bmad. But the Japanese Bud- dha is otally different; his chest is almost silent, because he breathes from the belly, but his belly is big- ger. It doesnt look very good – be- cause tlle idea prcvalent in the world is so old, but breathing fiom the belly is more natural, morc rc- laxed. In the night it happens when you sleep; you don’t breathe fiom the chest, you breathe from the belly. That’s why the night is such a re- laxed experience. After your sleep, in the morning you feel so fiesh, so young, because the whole night you werc brcathing natually… you werc in Japan! These are the two points: if you are afraid that breathing from the belly and being attentive to is ris- ing and falling will desroy your athletic form…men may be more interested in that athletic form. Then for them it is easier to watch near the nostrils where the breath enters. Watch, and when the breath goes out” watch.

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These are trb tuee forms. Any one will do. And if you want to do two forms together, you can do two forms together; then the effort will become more intense. If you want to do all three forms together, you can do all three forms together. Then the possibilities will be quick- er. But it all depends on you, what- ever feels easy. Remember: easy is right. As meditation becomes sefiled and mind silent, the ego will disappear. You will be there, but there will be no feeling of ‘I’. Then 0rc doon are open. Just wait with a loving longing, with a welcome in the heart for that grcat moment – the greatest mo- ment in anybody’s life – of enlight- enment. It comes. . . it certainly comes. It has never delayed for a single momenl Once you are in the right tuning, it suddenly explodes in you, trans- forms you. The old man is dead and the new man has arrived. z

Sitting

Find a reasonably cornfortable and alert position to sit for 40 to 60 minutes. Back and luad shotld be straight, eyes closed and breathing normal. Stay as still as possible, only changing position if il is really necessary. While silting, the prirrury object is to be watching the rise and fall of the belly, slightly above the navel, caused by breathing in and out. It is not a concentration technique, so while watching the breath, many other things will takc your attention away. Nothing is a dis- traction in vipassana, so when something else comes up, stop watching tlrc breath, pay attention to wlatever is lappening until it’s possible to go back to your breath. This rnay include thoughts, feel- ings, judgrrcnts, body sensations, impressions Irom the outside world, etc. It is the process of watching that is significant, not so much what you

are watching, so remember not to become idenffied with wlatever comes up; questions or problems may just be seen as mysteries to be enjoyed!

Vipassana walk

This is a slow, ordinary walk based on the awareness of the feet touching the ground. You can walk in a circle or a line of l0 to 15 steps going back and forth, inside or out of doors. Eyes should be lowered on the ground a few steps ahead. While walking, the atlention should go to the contact of each foot as it buches the ground. If other things arise, stop paying atten- tion to the feet, notice what else took your attention’and then re- turn to the feet. It is the swne techniqrc as in sit- ting – bw watching a diferent pri- muy object. You can walk for 20 to 30 minutes.t

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

fihiva said: Radiant one, this

\experience nny dawn be- L) ween two breaths. After breath comes in (down) and just before twning up (ow) – the beneficence.

When your breath comes tn, ob- seme. Fot a single moment or a thousandth part of a moment, lherc is no breathing – before it tums up, before it tums outward. One breath comes int then therc is a cerain point and b,reathing stops. Then the brcathing go€s oul When the breath goes out, then again for a single

Watching the Gap in the Breath moment, or a part of a momeni” breathing stops. Then breathing comes in. Beforc the breath is turning in or turning out, there is a moment when you are not brcathing. In tlnt moment the happening is possible, because when you arc not brcath- ing you arc not in the world. Un- dentand this: when you arc not brcathing you are dead; you are

still, but dead. But the moment is of such a strort duration, you never obsene iL Breath coming in is rcbirth; heath going out is death. The outgoing brcath is synonymous with death; the incoming breath is synonymous with life. So with each breath you are dying and being reborn. The gap benveen the two is of a very short duration, but keen sincere ob-

servation and attention will make you feel the gap. Then nothing else is needed. You are blessed. You have lnown; the thing has hap’pened. You are not to rain the breath. l”eave it just as it is. Why such a simple technique? It looks so sim- ple. Such a simple technique o lnow the truth? To know tlp trutlr means to know thiat which is nei-

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ther b6n nor dies, o know that etemal element which always is. You can lnow the heath going out, you can tnow the breath coming in, but you never know the gap be- tween the two. Try it. Suddenly you will get tlrc point – and you can get ir it is al- ready there. Nothing is o be added to you or to your structue: it is al- ready there. Everything is already there except a certain awarcnes. So how to do this? First, become aware of the breath coming in. Watch it. Forget everything: jus warch heattr coming in – the very passage. When the keath touches your nos- trils, feel it there. Then let the breath move in. Move with the breath fully conscious. Whan you are going dowrq down, down with the breath,

do not miss the h€ath. Do not go ahead; do not follow behind. Just go with it. Remember this: do not go ahead; do not follow it like a shad- ow. Be simultaneous with it. Brcath and consciousness should be- come one. The breath goes in; you go in. orily then will it be possible to get the point which is between two breaths. It will not be easy. Move in with the breath, then move out with the heath: in-out, inout Buddha ried particularly o use this method, so this method has become a Buddhist method. In Buddhist ter- minology it is tnown as ‘Ana-

panasati Yoga’. And Brddha’s en- lightenment was based on this tech- nique – only this. If you go on practicing breath con- scioumess, breath awaleness, snd-

denly, orc day without knowing, you will come to the interval. As your awar€ness will become keen and deep and intense, as your awarcness will become bracketed – the whole wqld is bracketed ouq only your breath coming in or go- ing out is your wal( the whole arena for you consciousness – sud- denly yur arc bound o feel the gap in which therc is no breath. When you are moving wittr breattr minutely, when there is no breath, how can yur remain unaware? You will suddenly become aware that therc is no breath, and the moment will come when you will feel that the b’reath is neither going out nor coming in. The breath has $opped completely. In that stryping, “the beneficence.” r

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

(-l hiva said: When in worldly \ acnviry keep attentive be-

LI ween the two breatls, and so practicing, in a few days be born anew.

Whatsoever you are doing, keep your affention in the gap betrveen the nvo breaths. But it must be practiced while in activity. We have discussed the technique that is just similar. Now tlrere is only this ffierence, that this has o be practiced while in worldly ac- tivity. Do not practice il in isola- tion. This practice is to be done

Watching the Gap in the Mlrketplace while you are doing something else. You are eating: go on eating, and be auentive to the gap. You are walking: go on walking and be at- tentive to the gap. You are going to sleep: lie down, let sleep come. But you go on being attentive to the gap. \thy in activitf Because activity disracls the mind Activity calls your attention again and 4gain. Do

not be disuacted. Be fued at the gap, and do not stop activity; let ttre activ- ity cmtinue. You will have two lay- ers of existerrce – doing and being. We have two layers of existence: the world of doing and the world of be- ing, the circumference and the cen- ter. Go on working on the periphery on the circumference; do not stop it. But go on working attentively on the center also. What will happen?

Your activity will become an act- ing, as if you are playing a part. If this method is practiced, your whole life will become a long dra- ma. You will be an actor playlng roles, but constantly centered in the gap. If you forget tlre gap, then you arc not playrng roles; you have be- come the rcle. Then it is not a dra- ma. You have mistaken it as life. That is what we have done. Everv-

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T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

fi hiva said: When in worldly

\ acrrviry kcep attentive be- L) ween the two breaths, and so practicing, in a few days be born anew.

Whatsoever you arc doing, keep your attention in the gap benveen the two brcaths. But it must be practiced while in activity. We have discussed the technique tlnt is just similar. Now there is only this difference, that this has o be practiced while in worldly ac- tivity. Do not practice it in isola- rion. This practice is o be done

Watching the Gap in the VtErketplace while you are doing something else. You are eating: go on eating, and be atlentive to tlre gap.You are walking: go on walking and be at- tentive o the gap. You are going to sleep: lie down, let sleep come. But you go on being attentive to ttte gap. Why in activity? Becar:se aaivity distracls the mind Aaivity calls your attention again and agai[ h

not be disracted. Be lxed at the gap, and do not stop aaivity; let the aaiv- ity continue. You will have wo lay- €rs of existence – doing and being. We have two layers of existence: the world of doing and the world of be- ing, the circumference and the cen- ter. Go on working on the periphery on the circumference; do not stop it. But go on working attentively on the center also. What will happen?

Your activity will become an act- ing, as if you are playing a part. If this method is practiced, your whole life will become a long dra- ma. You will be an actror playrng roles, but constantly centercd in the gap. If you forget the gap, then you arc not playrng nles; you have be- come the role. Then it is not a dra- ma. You have mistaken it as life. That is what we have done. Everv-

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M E D I T A T I O N S

one rhfuils he is living life. It is not life. It is just a role – a part which has been given to you by society, by circumstances, by culnrrc, by fadi- tion, by the counEy, the situation. You have been given a role. You are playing iq you have become identi- fied with iL To brcak that identifica- tion, use this technique.

This technique is just to make yourself a psychodrama – just a play. You are focused in the gap benpeen two breaths, and life moves on, on the periphery. If your attention is at the center, then your atention is not rcally on the periphery; that is just ‘sub-atten-

tion’. It just happens somewhere

near your attention. You can feel it, you can know it, but it is not significant. It is as if it is not hap- pening to you. I will repeat this: if you practice this technique, your whole life will be as if it is not happening to you – as if it is hap- pening to someone else. s

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

f-lhiva said: With innngible \ brecrlr in tlu center of rlu

L) forelead, as this rerchcs thc laart at thc monuu { sleep, lwve direction over dreatns and over dcath ilself.

Ii*e this lechnique in tluee parc. One, you must be able to feel the prana in breath, fte intangible part of it” the invisible part of it, the im- material part of it. The feeling comes if you arc attentive between the two eyebrcws. Then it comes easily. If you are auentive in the gap, then too it comes, but a little less easily. If you ale aware of the

DrcamMastery center at your navel where breath comes and touches and goes out, it also comes, but with less ease. The easiest point fiom which to know the invisible part of heath is to be centercd at the third eye. But wher- ever you arB centered, it comes. You begin to feel the prana flowing in. The ingoing breath and the outgo- ing breath are the same as vehicles,

but the incoming breath is filled with prana and the outgoing breath is empty. You have sucked the pran4 and the breath has become empty. This suEa is very, very signihcanc “With intangible breath in the cen- ter of the folehead, as this rcaches tlrc heart at, the moment of sleep, have direction over dreams and over death itself.” While vou are

falling ino sleep, this technique has to be practiced – then only, not at any other time. While you are falling asleep, only then. That is ttrc right moment to practice this technique. You are falling asleep. Little by little, sleep is overtaking you. lilithin moments, your con- sciousne^ss will dissolve; you will not be awarc. Beforc that moment comes, become aware – aware of

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T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

the breath and the invisible part, prana, and feel it coming to the heart. If this happens – that you are feel- ing invisible breath coming ino the heart and slcep overtakes you – you will be aware in dreams. You will know that you arc dreaming. fti- narily we do not lnow that we are dreaming. While you dream you think that this is reality. That too happens because of the third eye. Have you seen anyone asleep? His eyes move upward and become fo- cused in the third eye. Because of this focusing in the third eye, you take your dreams as real; you cannot feel they are dreams. They are real. You will know when you get up in the morning, tren you will know that “I was dreaming.” But this is the lateq reuospective realization. You cannot rcalizn, in the dream that you

are dreaming. If you realize it, then there are two layen: the &eam is there, but you are awake, you are aware. For one who becomes aware in dreams. this sutra is wonderful. Il. says, “Have direction over dreams and over death itself.” If you can become aware of dreams, you can create dreams. Ordinarily you cannot create dreams. How impotent man is! You cannot even create dreams. You cannot create dreams! If you want to dream a particular thing, you cannot dream it; it is not in your hands. How powerless man is! Even dreams cannot be created. You are just a victim of dreams, not the creator. A dream happens to you; you cannot do anything. Neither can you stop it nor can you create it. But if you move into sleep remem- bering the heart being filled with

prana, continuously being ouched by prana with every breath, you will become a master of your dreams – and this is a rare mastery. Then you can drcam whatsoever dreams you like. Just note while you are falling asleep that “I want to dream this dteam,” and that dream will come to you. Just say while falling asleep, “I do not want to dream that dream,” and that dream cannot enter your mind. But what is the use of becoming tlp master of your &eaming? Isnt it useless? No, il is not useless. Once you become master of your dreams you will never dream. It is absurd. When you are master of your dreams, &eaming stops; therc is no need for it And when dream- ing stops, your sleep has a different quality altogettnr, and the quality is the same as of death. o

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

the breath and the invisible part, prana, and fecl il coming o the heart. If this happens – that you are feel- ing invisible breath coming ino the heart and sleep overtakes you – you will be aware in dreams. You will know that you arc &eaming. ffii- narily we do not lnow that we are dreaming. While you dream you think that this is reality. That oo happens because of the third eye. Have you seen anyone asleep? His eyes move upward and become fo- cused in the third eye. Because of this focusing in the third eye, you take your dreams as real; you cannot feel they are dreams. They are rcal. You will know when you get up in the morning, then you will know that “I wa^s dreaming.” But this is the later, reuospective rcalization. You cannot rcalize in the dream ftat vou

are dreaming. If you realize it, then there are two layers: the dream is there, but you arc awake, you are aware. For one who becomes aware in dreams, this sutra is wonderful. It says, “Have dfuection over dreams and over death itself.” If you can become aware of dreams, you can create drcams. Ordinarily you cannot create dreams. How impotent man is! You cannot even create dreams. You cannot create dreams! If you want to dream a particular thing, you cannot dream it; it is not in your hands. How powerless man is! Even dreams cannot be created. You are just a victim of dreams, not the creator. A dream happens to you; you cannot do anything. Neither can you stop it nor can you create it. But if you move into sleep remem- bering the heart being filled with

pnana, continuously being ouched by prana with every breath, you will become a master of your dreams – and this is a rare mastery. Then you can dream whatsoever dreams you like. Just note while you are falling asleep that “I want to dream this dream,” and that dream will come to you. Just say while falling asleep, “I do not want to dream that dream,” and that dream cannot enter your mind. But what is the use of becoming the master of your &eaming? Isnt it useless? No, it is not useless. Once you become master of your dreams you will never drcam. It is absurd. When you arc master of your drcams, &eaming sbps; therc is no need for it. And when dream- ing stops, your sleep has a different quality altogetheq and the quality is the same as of death. o

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

atdnjali said: The mind also becotnes tranquil by alternately expelling and

retaining the breath.

Whenever you feel that the mind is not uanquil – tense, worried, chat- tering, anxious, constantly drcam-

Throwing Things Out ing – do one thing: fint exhale deeply. Always start by exhaling. Exhale deeply; as much as you can, throw the air out. Throwing out the arg the mood will be thrown out loo, because brcathing is everything. And then expel the heath as far as possible. Pull the belly in and rctain for a few seconds; dont inhale. I-et the

air be ouL and don’t intule for a few seconds. Then allow the body to inhale. Inhale deeply – as much :rs you cur. Again stop for a few seconds. The gap should be tle sarne as when you retain the breatlr out – if you retain it out for three seconds, retain the breath in for tfuee seconds. Throw it out and hold for three seconds; take it in

and hold for three seconds. But it has o be thrown out completely. Exhale totally and inhale otally, and make a rhythm. Hold, breathe in; hold, breathe out. Hold, breathe in; hold, breathe out Immediately you will feel a change coming into your whole being. The mood will go; a new climate will enter into

You. r

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

Opening the Heart

tl- h” heart is the gateles gate to reality. Move frrom I the head to the heart-

We are all hung up in the head. That is our only problem, the only one problem. And therc is only one solution: get dowm ftom the head ino the heart and all problems dis- appear. They are created by the head. And suddenly everything is so clear and so Eansparcnt that one is sur- prised how one was continuously inventing problems. Mysteries remain but problems disappear. Mysteries abound but problems evaporate. And mysteries are beau- tiful. They arc not to be solved. They have o be lived. t

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

he fint point try to be headless. Visualize your- self as headless: move

headlessly. It sounds absurd, but it is one of fte most important exer- cises. Try it, and then you will know. Walk, and feel as if you have no head. In the beginning it will be only

‘as if ‘. It will be very weird. When the feeling comes to you that you have no head, it will be very weird and strange. But by and by you will settle down at the heart. There is a law. You may have seen tlnt someone who is blind has

From Headto Heart keener sars, morc musical ears. Blind men are more musical; their feeling for music is deeper. Why? The energy that ordinarily moves through the eyes now cannot move through them, so it chmses a dif- ferent path – it moves through the ears. Blind men have a deeper sensitivi- ty of ouch. If a blind man touches you, you will feel the difference,

because we ordinarily do much work with ouch through our eyes: we are touching each other through otu eyes. A blind man cannot touch through the eyes, so the energy moves through his hands. A blind man is more sensitive than anyone who has eyes. Sometimes it may not be so, but generally it is so. En- ergy sffts moving from another center if one center is not there.

So ury this exercise I am talking about – the exercise in headles- ness – and suddenly you will feel a strange thing: it will be as if for the hrst time you are at the heart. Walk headlessly. Sit down to meditate, close your eyes and sim- ply feel ttnt therc is no head. Feel, “My head has disappeared.” In the beginning it will be just ‘as if ‘, but by and by you will feel that the

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

head has really disappeared. And when you feel that your head has disappeared, your center will fall down to the heart – immediately! You will be looking at the world through the heart and not through the head. When for the first dme Westemen reached Japan, they couldn’t believe that the Japanese traditionally have been thinking for centuries that they think through the belly. If you ask a Japanese child – if he is not educat- ed in Westem ways – “Where is your ttrinking?” he will point to his belly. Centuries and centuries have passed, and Japan has been living without the head. It is just a con- cept. If I ask you, “Where is your thinking going on?” you will point toward the head, but a Japanese person will point to the belly, not to the head – one of the reasons why the Japanese mind is more calm, quiet and collected. Now this is disturbed because the West has spread over everyhing. Now there exists no Easr Only in some individuals who are like is- lands here and tlpre does the East exist. Geognphically, the East has disappealed. Now the whole world is Westem. Try headlessness. Mediate standing before your minor in the batlroom. Look deep ino your eyes and feel

that you are looking fiom the heart. By and by the heart center will be- gin to function. And when the hearr functions, it changes your trotal per- sonality, ttrc total structure, the whole pattern, because the heart has its own way. So the hrst thing: ry headlesmess. Secondly, be more loving, because love cannot function through the head. Be more loving! That is why, when someone is in love, he loses his head. People say that he has gone mad. If you are not in love and mad, then you are not rcally in love. The head must be lost. If the head is there unaffected, function- ing ordinarily, tien love is not pos- sible, because for love you need the heart to function – not the head. It is a function of the heart. It happens $rat when a very rational person falls in love, he becomes stupid. He himself feels what stu- pidity he is doing, what silliness. What is he doing! Then he makes two parts of his life; he creates a di- vision. The heart becomes a silent, intimate affair. When he moves out of his house, he moves out of his heart. He lives in the world with the head and only comes down to the heart when he is loving. But it is very difficult. It is very difficult” and ordinarily it never happens. I was staying in Calcutta at a friend’s house, and the friend was a

justice of the High Court. His wife told me, “I have only one problem t0 tell you. Can you help me?” So I said, “What is the problem?” She said, “My husband is your friend. He loves you and respecb you, so if you say something to him it may be helpful.” So I askeJ her. “What is to be said? Tell me.” She said, “He remains a High Courtjudge even in bed. I have not known a loveq a friend or a hus- band. He is a High Court judge twenty-four hours a day.” It is difficult: it is difficult to come down from your pedestal. It be- comes a fixed attitude. If you are a businessman, you will remain a businessman in bed also. It is dif- ficult to accommodate fwo per- sons within, and it is not easy to change your pattern completely, immediately, anytime you like. It is difficult, but if you are in love you will have to come down from the head. So for this meditation try to be more and more loving. And when I say be more loving, I mean change the quality of your relationship: let it be based on love. Not only with your wife or with your child or with your friend, but toward life as such, become more loving. That is why Mahavir and Buddha have ralked about non-violence: it was

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M E D I T A T I O N S

just to crcate a loving a$inrde to- ward life. When Mahavir moves, walks, he remains aware not even to kill an ant Why? Really, the ant is not concemed. Mahavir is coming down fiom the head to the heart, creating a loving attitude toward life as such. The more your rela- tionship is based on love – all rela- tionships – the more your heart center will function. It will start working; you will look at the world through different eyes: be- cause the heart has its own way of

looking at the world. The mind can never look in that way: that is im- possible for the mind. The mind can only analyze! The heart syn- thesizes; the mind can only dis- sect, divide. It is a divider. Only the heart gives unity. When you can look through the heart the whole universe looks like one unity. When you approach through the mind, the whole world becomes atomic. Therc is no unity: only atoms and atoms and atoms. The heart gives a unilary experi- ence. It joins together and the ulti-

mate synthesis is God. If you can look through the heart, the whole universe looks like one. That one- ness is God. That is why science can never find God. It is impossible, because the metlrcd applied can never reach to the ultimate unity. The very method of science is reason, analysis, divi- sion. So science comes to molecules, aloms, electrons, and they will go on dividing. They can never come to the organic unity of the whole. The whole is impossible to look at through the head. z

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

t is best to do this prayer at night, in a darkened room, go- ing to sleep immediately after-

wards; or it can be done in the moming, but it must be followed by frfteen minutes rcsL This rcst is necessary, othenvise you will feel as if you are drunk, in a snrpor. This merging with energy is prayer.It changes you. And when you clnnge, the whole existence changes. Raise both your hands owards the sky, palms uppermost, head up, just feeling existence flowing in you. fu the energy flows down your arms you will feel a gentle tremor

Prayer Meditation – be like a leaf in a breeze, trem- bling. Allow it” help il Then let your whole body vibrate with en- ergy, and just let whatever happens happen. You feel again a flowing with the earth. Earfir and heaven, above and below yin and yang, male and fe- male – you float, you mix, you drop yourself completely. You are not. You become one … merge. After two to thee minutes, or whenever you feel completely

filled, lean down to ttre earth and kiss the earth. You simply become a vehicle to allow the divine energy to unite with that of the earth. These two stages should be repeat- ed six more times so that each of the chabas can’become unblocked. More times can be done, but if you do less you will feel restless and unable to sleep. Go into sleep in that very state of prayer. Just fall asleep and tlte ener- gy will be there. You will be flow-

ing with it, falling ino sleep. That will help very greatly because then the energy will surround you ilre whole night and it will continue to work. By the moming you will feel more frestr than you have ever felt before, more vital than you have ever felt before. A new elan, a new life will start penetrating you, and the whole day you will feel full of new energy; a new vibe, a new song in your heart, and a new dance in your step. I

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hiva said: In any easy posi- tion gradually pervade an area between the armpits

into great peace.

A very simple method but it works miraculously – try it. And anyone can try it, there is no danger. In an easy position: the hrst thing is to be in a relaxed position – easy, whatsoever is easy for you. So dont try some particular position or asana. Buddha sits in a particu- lar posture. It is easy for him. It can also become easy for you if you practice it for a time, but, in the very begrnning it will not be

The Heart of Peacefulness easy for you. And there is no need to practice ic srart from any pos- nue ftat comes easy to you right now. Dont sruggle with posture. You can sit in an easy chair and re- lax. The only thing is your body must be in a relaxed state. Just close your eyes and feel all over the body. Start from the legs feeling whether there is some ten-

sion. If you feel somewhere there is some tension, do one thing: make it more tense. If you feel that in the leg, in the right leg, therc is tension, then make that tension as intense as possible. Bring it to a peak and then suddenJy relax so that you can feel how rclaxation settles there. Then go all over the body just finding if there is some tension somewhere.

Wherever you feel the tension make it more, because it is easy to relax it when it is intense. In just a mid-state it is very difficult be- cause you cannot feel it. It is easy to move from one ex- treme to another, very easy, be- cause tlte very extreme creates the situation to move to the other. So if vou feel some tension in the face

 

 

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then strain all the face muscles as much as possible, create tension and bring it o a peak. Bring it o a point wherc you feel that now no more is possible – then suddenly re- lax. So see tlnt all parts of the body, all the limbs, are relaxed. Be particular about the face mus- cles, because they carry ninety per- cent of the tensions – the rest of the body carries only ten percent – be- cause all your tensions are in the mind and the face becomes the stor- age. So strain your face as much as possible, dont be shy about it- In- tensely make it in anguish, anxiety – and then suddenly rclax. Do it for five minutes so you can feel now the whole body, every limb, is rc- laxed. You can do it lying on the bed, you can do it siaing also – howsoever you feel is easy for you. The second thing: when you feel that the body has come to an easy posturc, dont make much fuss about it. Just feel that the body is relaxed, then forget the body. Becar.rse rcally, remembering the body is a sort of tension. So that’s why I say dont make much fuss about it. Relax it and forget it. Forgetting is relax- atiorL because whenever you re- mernber loo muctr, that v€ry r€mem- bering hings a tension to the body. Then close your eyes and just feel the area benpeen the wo armpis:

the heart area, your chesr Fint feel it, just benpeen the npo armpits, bring your total attention, total awarcness. Forget the whole body, just ttn heart area between the wo armpits, your chest, and feel it filled wilh geat peace. The moment lhe body is rclaxed, auomatically peace happens in your heart The tpafi becomes silent, relaxed, harmonious. And when you forget the whole body and bring your attention just to the chest and consciously feel that it is filled with peace, much peace will happen immediately. There are two arcas in the body, particular cent€rs whete particular feelings can be crcated consciously. Between fte npo armpis is the cen- ter of the heart, and the heart center is the source of all peace ttrat hap pens to you, whenever it happens. Whenever you are peaceful, the peace is coming fiom the hearr The heart radiates peace. That’s *hy people fiom all over the world, without any distinction of caste, re- ligion, counury, culhred s uncul- hled, every race, have felt this: that love arises somewhere forn the heart No scientific explanation ex- ists. So whenever you think of love you think of tte heart ReallX whenever you arc in love you are relaxed, and because you arc rclaxed you arc

filled with aenanpeace. And tlut peace arises ftun the ttearr So peace and love have become Fined, associated. Whenever you are in love you are peaceful; when- ever you are not in love you are disurbed. Because of peace the heart has become associated witlr love. So you can do two things. Either you can search for love, then sometimes you will feel peace. But the path is dangerous, because the other person whom you love has become mue important than you. The other is the other, and you are becoming dependent in a way. So love will give you peace sometimes but not always. Therc will be many disnrbances, many moments of anguish and anxiety, because the other has entercd and whenever the other enters there is bound to be some disnrbance be- cause you can meet with the other only on your surface, and the sur- face will be disnrbed. Only some- times – when the two of you will be so deeply in love with no con- flict – only sometimes you will be relaxed and ttre heart will glow with peace. So love can grve you only glimpses ofpeace but never really any esab lishment, any mote&tess in peace. No etemal peac€ is poasible thmrgh it, only glimpces. And be-

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tween two glimpses herc will be deep valleys of conflict, violence, haued, anger. The other way is not to find peace through love, but !o find peace di- rectly. If you can find peace dfuectly – and his is ttre method – yow life will become filled with love. But now the quality of love will be dif- ferenL It will not be possessive; it will not be centercd on one. It will not be dependent and it will not make anyone dependent on you. Your love will become just a lov- ingness, a compassion, a deep em- pathy. And now no one, not even a lover, can diswb you, because your peace is already rmted and you love is coming as a shadow of your inner peace. The whole thing has become revened: so Buddha is also loving but his love is not an anguish. If you love you will suffeq, if you dont love you will suffer. If you dont love you will suffer the ab- sence; if you love you will suffer the prcsence of love. You are on the surface and whatsoever you do can give you only momentary satisfac- tions, and then again, the da* val- ley. The trcart is nanrally the source of peace, so you arc not crcating any- thing. You arc simply coming o a source which is always therc. And this imagination will help you be-

oome aware tlnt the treart is filled with peace, not that this imagina- tion will crcate the peace. This is the difference between the tanra at- titude and Western hlpnosis: hyp notists think that by imagination you are creating iq anra thinks that you are not crcating it – by imagi- nation you ale simply becoming at- nrned to something that is akeady there. Whatsoever you can crcate by imagination cannot be perma- nenl If it is not a rcality then it is false, unreal, and you are creating a hallucination. Try this: whenever you arc able o feel the peace benveen the two armpits frlling you, pervading your own heart centet the world will look illusory. This is a sign that you have entered meditation – when the world feels, appears io be illusory. Dont think that the world is illuso- ry; there is no need to thlnk – you will feel ir It will suddenly occur to your mind – “What has happened to the wuld?” The wold has sud- denly gone dreamy, a dreamlike ex- istence. It is there, without any sub- stance, just like a film on 0te scr€en. It looks so rcal; it can even be tlrce-dimensional – just looks, looks a projected thing. Not that the world is a pojected thing, not that it is rcally unreal – no. The world is rcal but you crcate distance, and the distarrce becomes geater and

greate[ And you can undenand whether he distarce is becoming g€ater and geater or not” by know- ing how you arc feeling about the world. So tlnt is the criterion. This is not a truih – that the world is un- rcal – this is a meditative criterion. If tlle world has become urueal, you have become centercd into tlp being. Now the surface and you are so far away that you can look at the surface as something objective, something otlpr than you. You are not identified” This technique is very easy and will not take much time if you try iL Even sometimes il happens with this technique that in the very fint effort you will feel the beauty and the miracle of it. So ury ir But if you arc not feeling it in the very first effort, dont be disap’pointed. Wait, and go on doing ir And it is so easy you can do it any time. Just lying on your bed at night you can do ig just in tlte moming when you feel that you arc now awake you can do iL Do it fnst and then get up, even ten minutes wiu be enough, or ten minutes at night just beforc falling asleep. Make the world unreal, and your sleep will be so deep – you may not have slept like that beforc. If the wsld becomes urueal just befue falling asleep, dreams will be fewer be- cause if the world has become a

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&eam, drcams cannot continue. And if ttp world is unrcal, you are toully rclaxed, othenvise tlrc rcality of the world goes on impinging on you, hammering on you. As far as I know – I have suggested this technique to many people who suffer ftrom insomnia – it helps deeply. If ttp world is unreal, ten- sions dissolve. And if you can move ftrom the periphery you have akeady moved to a deep state of sleep – before sleep comes you are alrcady deep into ir And then in the moming it is beautiful because you are so fresh, so young, the whole energy vibrating and just coming fiom the cenbr back to tlrc periph- ery. The moment you become dert that now sleep is finished, dont open your eyes first. First do this: the

body is rclaxed after tlre whole night, feeling fiesh and alive so do this experiment for ten minutes, then open the eyes. Relax. You are akeady rclaxed; it will not trke much time. Just relax. Bring your consciousness to the heart just be- tween the two armpits: feel it filled with deep peace. For ten minutes remain in that peace, and then open the eyes. And the world will look totally different because that peace will be radiated fiom your eyes also. And the whole day you will feel different – not only will you feel diffetent, you will feel people are behaving differently with you. To every rclationship you con- tribute something. If your contribu- tion is not there, people behave dif- ferently because they feel you are a

different person. They may not be aware of it. But when you are filled with peace everyone will behave differcndy with you. They will be more loving and more kind, less rc- sisant, more qpent closer. The magnet is there. The peace is fte magneL When you arc peaceful people come nearcr to you; when you arc disturbed everyone is re- peled. This is so physical a phe- nomenon that you can obsene it easily. Whenever you ale peaceful you will feel everyone wants to be closer to you because that peace ra- diates, it becomes vibrations around you. Circles of pe4ce move around you and whosoever comes near feels to be nearer to you -just like the shadow of a ree and you feel to move under the shadow and relax there. I

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liva said: Blessed one, ss senses are absorbed in the heart, reach the center of

the lotus.

So what is to be done in this tech- nique? “As senses are absorbed in the hear…” Try! Many ways are possible. You touch someone: if you arc a heart-oriented person the touch immediately goes to your heart, and you can feel the quality. If you take the hand of a person who is head-oriented, the hand will be cold – not just cold, but the very quality will be cold.

HeartCentering A deadness, a certain deadness, will be in the hand. If the person is heart-oriented, then there is a certain warmth. Then his hand will rcally melt with you. You will feel a certain thing flowing from his hand to you, and there will be a meeting – a communication of warmth. This warmth comes fiom the

heart. It can never come fiom the head because the head is always cool, cold, calculative. The heart is warm, non-calculative. The head always thinks about how to take more, the heart always feels how to give more. That warmth is just a giving – a giving of energy, a giv- ing of inner vibrations, a giving of life. That is why you feel a differ-

ent quality in it. If the person real- ly embraces you, you will feel a deep melting with him. Touch! Close your eyes; touch anything. Touch your beloved or your lover, touch your child or your mother, or your friend, or touch a uee or a flower, or just touch the earth. Close your eyes and feel a communication from

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

your heart to the earth, or to your beloved. Just feel that your hand is your heart stretched out to touch the earth. Let the feeling of ouch be related to the heart. When you are listening to music, do not listen to it fiom the head. Just forget your head and feel that you are headless. There is no head at all. It is gmd to have your own picture in your be&oom without the head. Concentrate on it: you are without the head; do not allow the head to come in. While listening to music, listen to it from the heart. Feel the music coming to your heart; let your heart vibrate with it. tet your senses be joined to the heart” not to the head. Try this with all the sens- es, and feel more and more that ev- ery sense goes into the heart and dissolves into it. “Blessed one, as senses are ab- sorbed in the heart, reach the center of the lotus.” The heart is the lotus. Every sense is just the opening of

the lotus, the petals of the lotus. Try to relate your senses to the heart first. Secondly, always think tlnt every sense goes deep down ino the heart and becomes absorbed in it. When these two things become established, only then will your senses begin to help you: they will lead you t0 the heart, and your heart will become a lotus. This lotus of the heart will give you a centering. Once you lnow the center of the heart, it is very easy to fall down into the navel center It is very easy! Really, this sutra does not even mention this; there is no need. If you arc rcally absorbed in the heart totally, and reason has stopped working, then you will fall down. From the heart, the door is opened oward the navel. Only from the head is it difficult o go toward the navel. Or, if you are between the two, between the heart and the head, then too it is difhcult to go to the navel. Once you are absorbed in

fte navel, you have suddenly fallen beyond the hearr You have fallen into tlp navel center which is the basic one – the original. If you feel that you are a heart-ori- ented person, then this method will be very helpful to you. But know well that everyone is trying to deceive himself that he is heart- oriented. Everyone tries o feel that he is a very loving person, a feeling type – because love is such a basic need that no one can feel at ease if he sees that he has no love, no loving heart. So everyone goes on thinking and believing, but be- lief will not do. Observe very im- partially, as if you are observing someone else, and then decide – because there is no need to de- ceive yourself and it will be of no help. Even if you deceive younelf, you cannot deceive the technique. So when you do this technique, you would feel that nothing is hap- pening. s

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tisln said: Train in join- ing, sending and taking to- getlur. Do this by riding

the breath.

Atisha says: start being compas- sionate. And the method is, when you breathe in – listen carcfully, it is one of the geatest methods – when you breathe in, think that you arc breathing in all the mis- eries of all the people in the world” All the darkness, all the negativity, all the hell that exisls anywhere, you are brcathing it in. And let it be absorbed in your heart.

Atisha’s He art Meditation You may have read or heard about the so-called positive thinkers of the West. They say just the oppo- site – they dont know what they are saying. They say “When you breathe out” throw out all your misery and negativity. And when you breathe in, breathe in joy, positivity, happiness, cheerful- ness.” Atisha’s method is just ttre oppo- site: when you brcatln in, breathe in all ttre misery and suffering of

all the beings of the world – past, present and futue. And when you breathe ouE breathe out all the joy that you have, all the blissfulness that you have, all ttte benediction that you have. Brcathe out” pour yourself ino existence. This is the method of compassion: drink in all the suffering and pour out all tlte blessings. And you will be surprised if you do it. The moment you take all the suf- ferings of the world inside you, they

are no longer zufferings. The hean immediately transforms the energy. The heart is a ransforming force: ddnk in rnisery, and it is uans- formed into blissfulness… then pour it out. Once you have leamed that your heart can do this magic, this mira- cle, you would like o do it again and again. Try it. It is one of the most practical methods, simple, and itbrings immediatercsults. Do it todaX and see. o

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

Start \dth yourself

1l tisla said: Begin the fovel- .f-l,opment of taking wirh your- self .

Atisha says: before you can do this witlr the whole existence, you will have to start first with yourself. fiis is one of the fundamental se- crets of inner growth. You cannot do anything with others that you have not done in the fint place with younelf. You can hurt othen if you hurt yourself, you will be a pain in the neck to otlren if you are a pain in the neck to yourself, you can be a blessing to others only if you are a blessing o yourself. Whatsoever you can do with others, you must have done to yourself be- fore, because that is the only thing that you can share. You can share only that which you have; you can- not share that which you dont have. Atisha says: “Begin ttre develop ment of taking with yourself.” Ratlrer than starting by taking the whole misery of the world and ab sorbing it in the heart, start with your own misery. Dont go ino tlre deep sea so fast; learn swimming in shallow water. And if you immedi- ately start uaking the misery of the whole existence, it will remain sim- ply an experirnent in speculation. It

wont be rcal, it cant be rcal. It will bejust verbal. You can say !o yourself “Yes, I am taking the misery of the whole world” – but what do you tnow of the misery of the whole world? You have not even experienced your own misery. We go on avoiding our own misery. If you feel miserable, you put on the radio or the TV and you be- come engaged. You start reading the newspaper so that you can for- get your misery, or you go to the movies, or you go to your woman or your man. You go t0 the club, you go shopping in the market, just somehow to keep yourself away from yourself, so tlrat you need not see the wound, so that you need not look at how much it hurts within. Pmple go on avoiding themselves. What do they know of misery? How can they think of the misery of the whole cxisknce? FLst, you have to begin with your- self. If you are feeling miserable, let it become a medindon. Sit silently, close the dmrs. Fint feel the mis- ery with as much intensity as possi- ble. Feel the hurt. Somebody has insulted you: now the best way to avoid the hurt is to go and insult him, so that you become occupied with him. That is not meditration. If somebody has insulted you, feel thankful to him that he has given

you an opportunity to feel a deep wound. He has opened a wound in you. The wound may have been created by many many insuls that you have suffered in your whole Iife; he may not be the cause of all the suffering, but he has figgered a pIOCeSS.

Just lock your room, sit silently, with no anger fon the person but with total awareness of the feeling that is arising in you – the hurt feel- ing that you have been rejected, that you have been insulted. And then you will be surprised that not only is this man there: all the men and all the women and all the peo- ple that have ever insulted you will start moving in your memory. You will start not only remember- ing them, you will start reliving them. You will be going into a kind of primal. Feel the hurt, feel the pain, dont avoid it. That’s why in many tlrera- pies the patient is told not to take any drugs before the therapy be- grns, for the simple rcason that drugs are a way to escape from your inner misery. They dont al- low you t0 see your wounds, they rcpress them. They dont allow you to go into your suffering and unles you go into your suffering, you cannot be released from the impris- onment of it. It is perfectly scientific to drop all

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drugs before going into a grouP – if possible even drugs like coffee, tea, srnoking, because these are all ways to escape. Have you watched? Whenever You feel nervous you immediately start smoking. It is a way to avoid ner- vousness; you become occuPied with smoking. Really it is a regres- sion. Smoking makes You again feel like a child – unworried, non- responsible – because smoking is nottring but a symbolic breast. The hot smoke going in simPlY takes you back to the days when You were feeding on the mother’s breast and the warm milk was going in: the nipple has now become the cigareue. The cigarette is a symbol- ic nipple. Through regression you avoid the responsibilities and the pains of be- ing adult. And that’s what goes on through many many drugs. Modern man is drugged as never beforc, be- cause modern man is living in great suffering. Without drugs it would be impossible to live in so much suffering. Those drugs create a bar-

rier; they keep you drugged, theY donl allow you enough sensitivitY to know your pain. The first thing o do is close your dmn and stop any kind of occupa- tion: looking at the TV, listening to the radio, r€ading a book. StoP all occupation, because th,at too is a subtle drug. Just be silent” utterly alone. Dont even pray, because that again is a drug, you arc becoming occupied, you start talking to God, you start praying, you escaPe from yourself. Atisha is saying: just be Yourself. Whatsoever the pain of it and what- soever the zuffering of it” let it be so. First experience it in its total in- tensity. It will be difficult, it will be heart-rending: you may start crying like a child, you may start rolling on the ground in deeP Pain, Your body may go through contortions. You may suddenly become aware that the pain is not only in the heart, it is all over the body – that it is rchlng all over, tlnt it is painful all ovel that your whole bodY is noth- ing but pain.

If you can experience it – this is of tremendous imporance – then start absorbing it” Dont thmw it away. It is such a valuable energy, dont tluow it away. Absorb it, drink it, accept it, welcome it, feel gateful to it. And say to yourself,

‘This

time I’m not going to avoid it, this time I’m not going to reject it, tltis time I’m not going o tlrow it away. This time I will drink it and receive it like a guest This time I will digest iL” It may take a few days for you to be able to digest it, but the daY it happens, you have surmbled upon a door which will take you really far, far away. A new journey has start- ed in your life, you are moving ino a new kind of being – because im- mediately, the moment you lrccept the pain with no rejection any- wher€, its energy and is quality changes. It is no longer pain. In fact one is simply surprised, one cannot believe it, it is so incredible. One cannot believe that suffering can be transformed into ecstasY, that pain can become joy. r

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Inner Centering

l\ToUoOt can exisr wirhour a cenrer. It has not ro be I \ created but only rediscovered. Essence is the cen- tel that which is your natue, that which is God-given. Personality is the circumference, that which is cultivated by society; it is not God-given. It is by nurture, not by nature. I

 

 

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1ft’ne Sufi mystic who had | | remained happy his whole \-t life – no one had ever seen him unhap’py – he was always laughing. He was laughter, his whole being was a perfume of cel- ebration. In his old age, when he was dying – on his deathbed, and still enjoying death, laughing hilar- iously – a disciple asked, “You pttzzls us. Now you are dying. Why are you laughing? What is ttrere funny about it? We are feel- ing so sad. We wanted to ask you many times in your life why you

are never sad. But no% con- ftonting death, at least one should be sad. You are still laughing! How are you managing it?” And the old man said, “It is a sim- ple clue. I had asked my master. I had gone to my master as a young man; I was only seventeen, and al- ready miserable. And my master was old, seventy, and he was sit- ting under a tree, laughing for no reason at all. Therc was nobody else, nothing had hap’pened, no- body had cracked a joke or any-

thing. And he was simply laughing, holding his belly. And I asked him, ‘What is tlte matter with you? Are you mad or something?’ “He said, ‘One day I was also as sad as you are. Then it dawned on me that it is my choice, it is my life.’ “Since that day, every morning when I get up, the first thing I de- cide is, before I open my eyes, I say to myself, ‘AMullah’ – tlnt was his name – ‘what do you want? Misery? Blissfulnes? What arc

you going !o choose today?’ And it happens that I always choose blissfulness.” It is a choice. Try it The first mo- ment in the morning when you be- come awarc that sleep has left, ask yourself, “AMullah, another day! What is your idea? Do you choose misery or blisfulness?” And who would choose misery? lnd why? It is so umatual – un- less one feels blissful in misery but then too you are choosing bliss, not misery. z

Abdullah

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

hiva said: On joyoruly see- ing a long absent friend, permeate thk joy.

When you ser a friend and sudden- ly feel a joy rising in your heart, concentrate on this joy. Feel it and become iL and meet the friend while being aware and filled with your joy. l,et the friend be just on the periphery, and you remain cen- tered in your feeling of happiness. This can be done in many other sit- uations. The sun is rising, and sud- denly you feel something rising within you. Then forget the sun; let

Whenever there is joy, you feel that it is coming ftom withoul You have met a friend – of course, it ap- pean that the joy is coming from your friend, ftom seeing him. That is not the actual case. The joy is al- ways within you. Ttre friend has just become a situation. The friend has helped it to come out” has helped you to see that it is there. And this is not only with joy, but

with everything: with anger, with sadness, with misery, with happi- nes, with everyhing, it is so. oth- ers arc only situations in which ttrings that are hidden in you are expessed. They are not causes; they are not causing something in you. Whatsoever is happening, it is happening to you.It has always been there; it is only that meeting with this friend has become a situ-

Findins the ReIl Source it remain on the periphery. You be centered in your own feeling of ris- ing energy. The moment, you lmk at iE it will sprcad- It will become your whole body, your whole be- ing. And dont just be an observer of iq merge ino ir There are a few moments when you feel joy, happi- ness, bliss, but you go on missing them because you become object- centercd.

 

 

M E D I T A T I O N S

ation in which whatsoever was hid- den has come out in the open – has come out ftom the hidden sources – it has become apparent, manifest Whenever this happens remain cen- tered in the inner feeling, and then you will have a different attitude about everyhing in life. Even with negative emotions, do this. When you are angry, do not be cenlered on the person who has aroused it. I-et him be on the pe- riphery. You just become anger. Feel anger in its 0otality; allow it to happen within. Dont rationalize; dont say ttnt this man has created it Do not condemn the man. He has

just become the situation. And feel grateful toward him that he has helped something which was hid- den to come into the open. He has hit you somewhere, and a wound was hidden there. Now you know it, so become the wound. With negative or positive, with any emotion, use this, and there will be a geat change in you. If the emo- tion is negative, you will be frced of it by being aware that it is with- in you. If the emotion is positive, you will become the emotion it- self. If it is joy, you will become joy. If it is ange6 the anger will dissolve.

And this is the difference between negative and positive emotions: if you become aware of a certain emotion, and by your becoming aware the emotion dissolves, it is negative. If by your becoming aware of a cerlain emotion you then become the emotion, if the emotion then sprcads and becomes your being, it is positive. Aware- ness works differently in both cas- es. If it is a poisonous emotion, you are relieved of it through awarcness. If it is good, blissful, ecstatic, you become one with it. Awareness deepens it. I

 

 

T H E M E D I T A T I O N S

f-lhiva said: In moods of \ extreme desire, be undis-

L) turbed.

When desire gnps you, you are disturbed. Of course, that is natu- ral. Desfue gnps you, then your mind stars wavering and many ripples go on, on the surface. The desire pulls you somewhere ino the future; the past pushes you somewhere ino the futurc. You are disturbed: you arc not at ease. De- sire is, therefore, o’dis-eos€’. This sutra says, “In moods of ex- treme desire be undisturbed.” But

Center of the Cyclone how to be undisnrbed? Dcsire means disturbance, so how to be undisturbed – and in exEeme mo- ments of desfue! You will have to do certain experiments; only then will you understand what it means. You are in angen anger grips you. You are temporarily mad, pos- sessed: you are no more in your senses. Suddenly rcmember to be undisturbed – as if you arc un-

dressing. Inside, become naked, naked ftom the anger, undressed. Anger will be there, but now you have a point within you which is not disturbed. You will know that anger is therc on the periphery. Like fever, it is there. The periphery is wavering; the periphery is disnubed, but you can look at it. If you can look at it, you will be undisturbed. Become a

wihess to it, and you will be undisturbed. This undisturbed point is your original mind. The original mind cannot be dis- turbed; it is never disturbed. But you have never looked at it. When anger is there, you become identified with the anger. You for- get that anger is something ofter than you. You become one with it, and you start acting through it,

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you slart doing something through ir. Two things can be done. In anger you will be violent to someone, to the object of your anger. Then you have moved t0 the other. Anger is just in between you and the other. Here I am, therc is ange4 and there you arc – the object of my anger. From anger I can tnavel in two di- mensions. Either I can travel to you: then you become my center of consciousness, the object of my anger. Then my mind becomes fo- cused on you, the one who has in- sulted me. This is one way that you can travel fiom anger. There is another way: you can !rav- el o yourself. You dont move to the penon whom you feel has caused the anger. You move to the person who feels to be angry; you move lo the subject and not ro the object. Ordinarily, we go on moving to the object” If you move to the object, the dust part of your mind is dis- tubed, and you will feel, disturbed.” If you move within to the cenier of your own being, you will be able to witness the dust paru you will be able o see that the dust part of the mind is dishrbed, but “I am not disturbed”. And you can ex- periment upon this with any desire, any disnubance. A sexual desire comes to your

mind; your whole body is taken by iu you can move to the sexual ob- ject, the object of your desire. The object may be there, it may not be there. You can move to the object in imagination also, but then you will get morc and more disturbed. The further away you go fiom your cen- teq the more you will be disturbed. Really, the distance and disturbance are always in goportion. The more distant you arc frrom your cente4 the more you ale disturbed; the nearer you arc to the centeq the less you are disturbed. If you are just at the cente4 there is no disturbance. In a cyclone, there is a center which is undisturbed – in the cyclone of anger, the cyclone of sex, the cy- clone of any desire. Just in the cen- ter therc is no cyclone, and a cy- clone cannot exist without a silent center. The anger also cannot exist without something within you which is beyond anger. Remember this: nothing can exist without is opposite. The opposite is needed therc. Without it, there is no possibility of it existing. If there werc no center within you which re- mains unmoved, no movement would be possible there. If there were no center within you which re- mains undisturbed, no disturbance could happen to you. Analyze this and observe this. If there were no center of absolute undisnrbance in

you, how could you feel that you are disturbed? You need a compari- son. You need two points o com- pare. Suppose a person is ill: he feels ill- ness because somewhere within him, a point, a center of absolute health exiss. That is why he can comparc. You say that your head is aching: how is it that you know about this ache, this headache? If you were the headache, you could not know it. You must be someone else, something else – the observer, tlp witness, who can say, “My head is aching.” This sutra says, “In moods of ex- treme desirc, be undisnubed.” What can you do? This technique is not for suppression. This tech- nique is not saying that when there is anger, supprcss it and remain undisturbed – no! If you supprcss, you will crcate more disturbance. If the anger is there and an effort o suppress is there, it will double the disturbance. When anger is there, close your doors, meditate on the angetr allow the anger to be. You remain undisturbed, and dont sup press it” It is easy to supgess; it is easy to exprcss. We do both. We express if the situation allows, and if it is con- venient and not dangemus for you. If you can harm the other and the other cannot harm you, you will

 

 

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exprcss the anger. If it is dangerous, if tfte otlrer can harm you more, if your boss or whoever you are angry at is more strong, you will supprcss ir- Expression and sup’pression are easy: witnessing is difficult Wit- nessing is neither It is not supprcss- ing, it is not expressing. It is not ex- pressing because you arc not ex- pressing it o the object of anger. It is not being suppressed either. You are allowing il o be expresed – ex- pressed in a vacuum. You are medi- tating on it. Stand before a mirror and express your anger – and be a witrress fo iL You are alone, so you can meditate on it. Do whatsoever you want to do, but in a vacuum. If you want to beat someone, beat, $rc empty sky. If you want to be angry, be angry; if you want to scr€arn, scream. But do it alone, and remember yourself as a point which is seeing all this, this drama. Then it becomes a psy- chodrama, and you can laugh at it and it will be a deep catharsis for you. Afterwards you will feel re- lieved of it – and not only relieved of ic you will have gained some- thing tfuough it. You will have ma- tured; a growth will have come to you. And now you will know that even while you werc in anger there was a centrer within you which was undisturbed. Now fy to uncover

this center more and more, and it is easy to uncover it in desfue. This technique can be very useful, and much benefit can happen to you tfuough it. But it will be diffi- cult because when you become dis- turbed, you forget everything. You may forget that you have to medi- tate. Then ry ft in this way: don’t wait for the moment when anger happens to you. Dont wait for ttrat moment! Just close tle door O your room, and think of some past experience ofanger when you went mad. Remember it, and re€nact iL That will be easy for you. Re-enact it again; do it again; relive it. Dont just remember ir relive it. Remem- ber that someone had insulted you and what was said and how you re- acted to him. React again; replay it. This re-enacting something from the past will do much. Everyone has scars in his mind, unhealed wounds. If you re-enact them, you will be unburdened. If you can go to your pst and do something which has rcmained incomplete, you will be unburdened ftom your past Your mind will become fiesh- er; the dust will be thrown away. Remember in your past something which you feel has remained sus- pended. You wanted lo kill some- one, you wanted to love someone, you wanted this and that” and that has remained incomplete. That in-

complete thing goes on hovering anund the mind like a cloud. “In m@ds of extreme desire, be undisturbed”: Gurdjieff used this technique a great deal. He created situations, but to create situations a school is needed. You cannot do ftat alone. Gurdjieff had a small school in Fontainebleau, and he was a taskmaster. He knew how to create situations. You would enter the room where a group was sit- ting, and something would be done so that you would get angry. And it would be done so natually that you would never imagine ttut some situation was being created for you. But it was a device. Someone would insult you by say- ing something, and you would get disturbed. Then everyone would help the disturbance and you would become mad. And when you werc right at the point where you could explode, Gurdjieff would shout, “Remember! Remain undisturbed!” You can help. Your family can be- come a schml; you can help each other. Friends can become a schml and they can help each ofter. You can decide with your family. The whole family can decide that now a sinration has o be created for tre father or for the motheq and then the whole family works to create the sinnion. When the fatlrcr or

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mofter goes completely mad, then everyone stafls laughing and says, “Remain completely undisturbed.” You can help each otheg and the ex- perience is simply wonderful. Once you know a cool center within you in a hot situation, you cannot forget iL And then in any hot sinndon you can remember it, rcclaim it, regain ir In the West now one technique, a therapeutic technique, is used: it is called “psychodrama.” It helps, and it is also based on techniques like this. In psychodrama you just enact, you just play a game. In the beginning it is a game, but sooner or later you become pos- sessed. And when you become pos- sessed your mind starts functioning, because your mind and your body function automatically. They furrc- tion auomatically! So if you se€ an actor acting in a psychodrama who, in a situation of ange4 rcally becomes angry, you may think that he is simply acting, but it is not so. He might have real- ly become anry; it may not be act- ing at all now. He is possessed by the desire, by tlrc disturbance, by the feeling, by the mood, and if he is rcally possesed, only tlrcn does his acting look real. Your body cannot know whether you are playing or whether you arc doing it for real. You may have ob-

served yourself at some time in your life that you were just playing at being angry, and you didnt know when the anger became rcal. Or, you werc just playing and you were not feeling sexual: you were play- ing witlt your wife or with your girlfriend, or with your husband, and then suddenly it became rcal. The body took over. The body can be deceived. The body cannot know whether it is real or urueal, particularly with sex. If you imagine it, your body thinks it is rcal. Once you start do- ing something, the body thinls it is real and it sarts behaving in a real way. Psychodrama is a techniqrc based on such methods. You are not an- gry: you are simply acting angry – and then you get into it. But psy- chodrama is beautiful because you know that you are simply acting. And then on the periphery anger becomes real, and just behind it you are hidden and looking at it. Now you know that you are not dis- turbed, but the anger is there, tle disturbance is there. The distur- bance is there, and yet the distur- bance is nol This feeling of two forces working simultaneously gives you a Ean- scendence, and then in real anger also you can feel it. Once you know how to feel it, you can feel it in rcal

Case Study Space Race

/in /by

Required Resources
Read/review the following resources for this activity:

  • Textbook: Chapter 9, 10
  • Lesson
  • Minimum of 2 scholarly sources (in addition to the textbook)

Instructions
For this assignment, analyze the space race.

  • What did it mean for the U.S. and USSR during the Cold War?
  • Is the space program still relevant?
  • Is it worth the cost, considering the growing debt?
  • How does the space program benefit the U.S. national economy in general?
  • How does it benefit the world?
  • Is space exploration the domain of the world’s leading nations?

Writing Requirements (APA format)

  • Length: 2-3 pages (not including title page or references page)
  • 1-inch margins
  • Double spaced
  • 12-point Times New Roman font
  • Title page
  • References page